Dumbledore: harrydidyouputyournameinthegobletofcum
Harry: what
Dumbledore: i was drinking snapes cum in a goblet and i nearly choked on this piece of paper with your name on it
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$LAYYYTER

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@one-hellish-std
Dumbledore: harrydidyouputyournameinthegobletofcum
Harry: what
Dumbledore: i was drinking snapes cum in a goblet and i nearly choked on this piece of paper with your name on it
they're saying these new Epstein emails are worse than Watergate and I am patiently waiting for this moment again
in case you were curious, this is the current state of NFT crypto bros on twitter
"my kids know me as this ape"
scientists wont tell you this! (because it's not true)
experts don't want you to know this! (because it's made up)
doctors HATE this one trick! (because it's dangerous and unhealthy)
All these woke liberals and their “i need my food every day to function”
Do you realize how much money you would save if you just didn’t eat?
that hotel california comic makes me lose my shit every single time & i’m so thankful for it honestly
there we go
every single person who reblogs this
every
single
person
will get “doot doot" in their ask box
I WANT TO KNOW YOUR SECRET
SERIOUSLY THOUGH WHAT ARE YOU
I love how scientific research just used to be:
Inside the Mind of the Homosexual by Wolfgang von Wandschrank
The homosexual is an odd creature. After skinning 17 of them alive, we have ascertained that they are attracted to the same sex.
like to charge reblog to cast obviously
my new awesome trick
Ngl i always get confused when dentists talk about the bad effects of soda on your teeth. Like im not using it as mouthwash lmao
It barely touches my teeth. My tongue is a water slide going straight into my throat for maximum flavor and chugging efficiency