Bitches Be Writing Poetry It’s Me, I’m Bitches

Physically I’m here, mentally I’m in the library.

[solavei]

today at work a coworker warned me that my patient’s owner let us know her cat is homophobic, meaning he tends to attack gay people violently on sight, which I thought was a joke. but that cat saw me and may have been the angriest cat I’ve ever worked with and DID in fact bite me through Kevlar gloves because he hated me so much

[solavei]

I want to emphasize that the cat was wearing a pride flag collar, which the owner gave him as exposure therapy

[solavei]

[solavei]

@butwhyduh I can confidently say this is not an issue that we’ve had before! He got a special sign made just for him.

[sydneymack]

“If I offer you the moon on a string, will you give me a kiss, too?”

Lucien Vanserra - A Court of Thorns and Roses

Artist: @carraert

[scurviesdisneyblog]

Cinderella and Prince Charming dancing in the clouds in these early explorations of the song sequence "So This Is Love" by Mary Blair

[raptorific]

Suzanne Collins really has the protocol down. On average twice a decade she writes a press release that's like "in one year there will be a new book and in two years there will be a movie based on said book. Here is the one philosopher I'll be referencing, and here is what upset me this time on the news enough to write another book. Enjoy!" and then she collects her millions, drops another banger, and doesn't go on twitter ever

[bi-accident]

Texas sheet cake - 1976

[bobbyfagbright]

one of the chocolate guys videos appears on your dash. you pause your scrolling to watch it, trying to guess what he’s making because this doesn’t seem to be one you’ve seen before. as the video goes on you get more unnerved and impressed — he seems to be making a whole human being this time, and it’s uncannily realistic. it’s even filled with candied fruit and sweet pastries in place of organs, red velvet cake and a cherry reduction making up flesh and blood beneath the chocolate. but something feels off. the person he’s making seems strangely familiar. upon the final reveal, you know why. amaury guichon has created a perfect replica of you

[flareboi]

[shinraalpha]

i love how Gandalf invested in Hobbits in year one and has been pushing them ever since. Thorin, i hear you need help with a breaking and entering. Can I recommend one of these little cunts? Silent as fuck, trust me. Elrond my dude i know you're skeptical but these four chucklefucks just transported a weapon of mass destruction all the way here. Theoden, you've gotta get yourself a hobbit man, I've got a spare one here. Denathor you big prick, take a hobbit - literally this is the bottom of the range but listen to him sing. Beautiful little bastard.

[dailynarnia]

is jake gyllenhaal gay??

why would you ask us, a narnia blog, this

[helloitsbees]

happy pride month to this post specifically

[prinnay]

Stroll in the Rain

[katsigian]

Changing my belief system from "this is the hill I'll die on" to "this is the hill I'll kill you on" has done absolute wonders for me 10/10 do recommend

[estrogenesis-evangelion]

"you really gonna die on that hill?"

"someone is."

[iamthedukeofurl]

Everybody acts like each new Game Changer is a new level of betrayal and psychological torture from Sam towards his friends. Did we forget that the very first game changer was "Sam wheels out a strange machine and asks the contestants embarrassing personal questions, the veracity of their responses is judged by the Machine. The machine is actually controlled by the contestant's significant others who have been made accomplices. Forcing their loved ones into revealing shameful truths for internet broadcast." And sure, he's gotten a bit more personalized with these, constructing a variety of torture chambers for Brennan Lee Mulligan specifically, putting Grant O'Brien in various situations and then bringing his mother onto the set. But deception and betrayal were part of Game Changer from the beginning. So, when I hear people say "I can't believe Sam WENT THERE" about something all I can do is think to myself He went nowhere He's been there the whole time

[unbfacts]

[2spirit-1spoon]

Disabled people get in free. He offers a free wheelchair valet so ppl who can't get their own wheelchair wet can still play in the water park.

The entire park is accessible, including the carousel which is designed for wheelchair users. There's a sensory village and playground as well.

🥹🥹🥹

[holdingpatternthings]

It's been open since 2010!!

[autie-j]

Bugs Bunny could have simply walked into Mordor. He would have shown up at the gates of Mordor in a disguise and been like “Evil volcano inspection unit” and flashed a fake ID badge to the confused orc.

[themodernmaccabee]

Love the implication here that the one ring would have little to no effect on Bugs

[tyrantisterror]

To be fair, it’s canonically established in Lord of the Rings that Tom Bombadil, an inexplicable magical trickster, is unaffected by the ring, and the only reason they don’t give the job to him is because Tom Bombadil is a silly little man who’s easily distracted and just wants to spend time with his hot wife.

Bugs Bunny, on the other hand, loves nothing more than fucking over self-important dickheads, and is also an inexplicable magical trickster, so he would in fact be perfect for this mission.

[unassimilatedsoul]

The One Ring may not tempt Bugs, but he’d have other problems with the mission: he’d get lost halfway there (”I knew I should’ve made a left turn at Albuquerque”) and get distracted enough to hand the One RIng to Elmer Fudd or Yosemite Sam as a prank, only for it to be stolen by Daffy Duck, leading to an ever-increasing number of characters on an increasingly-destructive chase across Middle Earth as everyone keeps stealing it from each other, (Bugs would definitely pull the “evil volcano inspector” gag to get into Mordor, and he’d then immediately turn around and pose as a customs agent stopping whoever currently has the ring at the border and relieving them of it as “contraband”) culminating in an all-out brawl at Mount Doom.  Bugs manages to reclaim the ring one last time as everyone else is busy fighting each other, only for Daffy to come out of nowhere and grab it out of his hands.  Laughing maniacally, Daffy doesn’t realize that his victory dance has taken him right off the edge off a cliff - until Bugs points it out, at which point gravity reasserts itself, and Daffy and the ring both plunge to the fiery depths below

[eastofthemoon]

Daffy would just be crawling out of the volcano, feathers completely gone and he’s brunt to a crisp while Bugs is eating a carrot and just says:

“Got a good tan, doc?” “YOU’RE DESPICABLE!”

[southfarthing]

remember when éowyn first met faramir and immediately thought "ah yes. this is a guy who could wipe the floor with any soldier of rohan." bc I think about it a lot

[southfarthing]

this is their first meeting im about to chew on mithril

[southfarthing]

faramir: she's so sad and pretty and sad 😍🥵

éowyn: he's so tender and a killing machine

[marci1900]

[pronouncingitwang]

[ID: a photo of 19 birds in silhouette sitting on 4 telephone wires. Two of these birds are leaning into each other and backlit by the moon so that it looks like there’s a circle of light encapsulating them. /end ID]

[doctorrwby]

[kindofapieceofshit]

absofuckinlutely not

[hamletteprinceofdenmark]

You’re just continuing a long line of retail tradition babey

[02]

dr doofenschmirtz would have done this but for like some totally different reason he’d be like you see perry the platypus im sick of all the four-armed four-legged people buying up all the good mittens for winter. now when i have to go out and shovel the snow off the sidewalk in front of my evil building i have to use my old mittens and they’re not waterproof and my hands get wet and its very uncomfortable. now if i split these people in half they’ll be so busy looking for their other half they won’t even remember to go to the annual summer tri state area mitten sale!! and they’ll have less hands to buy mittens for too. and then perry would kick him in the face and knock the human splitter inator remote out of his hand and it would accidentally fire a beam all the way across town and candace would be like YOULL SEE MOM PHINEAS AND FERB MERGED THEMSELVES AND THEIR FRIENDS INTO A HORRIFIC HUMAN CONGLOMERATE but the inator beam would hit them and unfuse them right as candace brought her mom to the yard and her mom would be like hi kids do you want a snack and they’d all be laying in the grass like haha sure mrs flynn fletcher! and candace would be like WUH. BUT MOM O_O and then dr doofenschmirtz would be like ah well. at least i can still beat the four-armed four-legged people to the annual summer tri state area winter boots sale. but then he gets trampled by a mob of the four-armed four-legged people in big boots and theyre all like IM SO GLAD WE GOT TO THE ANNUAL SUMMER TRI STATE AREA WINTER BOOTS SALE EARLY AND BOUGHT ALL THE GOOD BOOTS! and doctor doofenschmirtz is lying on the ground all crumpled and goes CURSE YOU PERRY THE PLATYPUUUUUUUS!!!!!