(Im still making a cool decor to put here aswell T-T)
Basic Info:
Hi there :3 This is a jirai/spam/shitpost/diary/vent/complaining about my chud life wtv blog. You can call me Opeli, Dawn but my favourite name is Peli (She/he/any) This blog contains sensetive/triggering topics such as: SH, unhealthy eating habits (ed ig, not really tho), insecurities, general vents, relationship issues and other stuff I will try to tag/put tw infront of but if you dont like any of these topics then BLOCK and dont report...
Im a yumeshipper. idc about doubles and I share, but if youre the one who isnt cool with doubles I will block you so dw <3
Idk if anyone else has lil runmo as their theme but probably not so Im technically the little runmo of jiraiblr hehe
I'm a minor (under 16) and I live in germany
I got mood swings like crazy so dont worry too much about me. I do not claim to have any disorder/mental illness!!
Fandoms: hsr, jjk, nso/ngo, wuwa, Genshin, zzz, rdr2, Minecraft, Arcane, blue eye samurai, tdp, cod, cyberpunk edgerunners, persona, castlevania (nocturne), apothecary diaries, Death Note and more!! (not any in order)
Why am I just finding out NOW that terry is trans. Why do I lowk love the queer representation. 1 (technically 2) yuri, 1 yaoi, 1 nb character and now terry this is just peak
ALSO I SEARCHED IT UP ASTRID IS ALSO TRANS?? MY QUEEN HUHH WHY AM I ONLY FINDING OUT ABOUT THESE NOW ?!?!??
My thoughts feel like that one relative who keeps talking about your insecurities. like when I see people eat my mind goes like "damn, thats atleast x calories and they already ate x before. If I ate that I would feel guilty af..."
I LITERALLY CANT CONTROL IT. Even when I see people prepare or make food my first thought is how much calories does that actually have?? This is probably cuz I have a really bad relationship with food or whatever I literally don't say anything ever because Im not that big of an asshole. Idrc about other peoples bodies and how much they should or shouldnt eat its just none of my business so WHY DO I ALWAYS THINK THAT!!!
"Damn I could never eat that, thats like SO many calories!! " CAN MY MIND STFU??! SRSLY
Lowk is it wierd to say now that I watch mugbanks just so I get these thoughts on purpose when Im hungry? I feel like such an asshole rn omfg
Everytime I (try) to stay clean wether because Im too lazy to harm myself or because Im actually trying to get better for once I always get suicide thoughts/urges. When I relapse or give up they usually go away or get way less.
I kinda get why I feel like this cuz self harm is a coping mechanism and without it I feel anxious and irritated,, but I dont even feel guilty when I relapse because I felt even worse and more guilty when I was clean. I just hate it so much
Ig being clean makes me suicidal?? Not that I never have these thoughts when Im not clean, but they are just very rare and mild tbh
I hope you can get bandages for your legs, yeah jeans don't mix well with injuries cuz of the roughness...! Wearing leggings could work too but if it's summer time where you live and it's getting warmer, yeah no.
So I hope you get bandages!! Okie see ya take care 🤞
WOAH MY FIRST ANON ASK I EVER GOT!!!
I do have bandages, altough I dont really use them... I only have a few bandaids I sometimes use when my wounds arent really healing well or properly. I just wear leggings most of the times including when its like 20 something celsius outside, but they also get uncomfortable especially when I move around + the sweat occasionally gets in my wounds which makes them irritated...
I have some bandages from a old medikit and nothing more. I might buy some more soon tho!! Thank you for reminding me! Take care aswell, anon <33
Wearing jeans over your cvts is SO FUCKING UNCOMFORTABLE. ITS LITERALLY TORTURE. AND I THOUGHT I WOULD BE FINE BUT ONE OF THEM REOPENED FOR NO REASON... 🙁
NVM chat do NOT try this it looks like a unborn fetus or something you shit out during your period ngl. (and also smells like that) it got a nice consistency tho. a bit like bubblegum yk
