Ottomanfife @ottomanfife - Tumblr Blog

People who think sheep are killed for their wool are so hilarious to me. Does your barber slit your throat whenever you get a haircut?? Are you a returning customer to Sweeney Todd? Lmao it grows back, fools.

squareallworthy

This is completely ignoring the fact that the sheep's soul is stored in its wool. So sure, the body remains, but the spirit, the essence of the sheep, that's gone forever, and then as the wool regrows a new soul moves in.

storm-of-feathers

What

shadow-banned-the-hedgehog

Same for me, I get a new soul with every haircut. That's why my personality changes so much.

ovenroastedtwerkey

Tumblr citizenship means being completely unsure if the person posting about sheep souls is being 100% serious or is just taking the piss.

karalora

how dare you say we piss on those poor sheep, haven't they suffered enough

the-haiku-bot

how dare you say we

piss on those poor sheep, haven’t

they suffered enough

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

beardedmrbean

Original blog post

Le important day in meme history has arrived

alamuts-lair-of-madness

And Internet history was made.

ms-demeanor

Here she is in November 2023 celebrating her 18th birthday and being a very good doge.

lizluvscupcakes

p4nishers

"This Jannart - the man you loved," she said, looking him dead in the eye. "Do you think he would want you to give up, or carry on?"

"I don't want to carry on! Do you not understand? Does nobody in this world understand, damn you? Is no one else haunted?" A quiver of wrath entered his voice. "Everything I did - everything I was – everything I am, is because of him. He was someone before me. I am no one without him. I am tired of living without him at my side. He left me for that book and, by the Saint, I resent him for it. I resent him every minute of every day."

damn.

finisnihil

I’m tired of people acting like Zhongli is a serious and chill guy who would never cause problems on purpose as if he isn’t one of the biggest menaces out of the Seven. He used to throw mountains at Venti for annoying him. He, the god of history, starts fights among historians for shits and giggles. He tried to gaslight the Traveler into thinking he was totally not at the Chasm guys really Aether/Lumine you must be seeing things maybe you should go see Baizhu. When Qiqi wanted “Cocogoat” milk he was like “Oh yeah sure totally let’s go look for it” knowing damn well it was a wild goose chase. He made the Traveler sing to a flower and then was like “Oh would you look at that” when a Whooperflower jumped out to maul them. I love him. He’s like a cat pushing things off the counter to see how people react. I would pay to see him interact directly with Neuvillette because I know for a fact he’d get on that man’s nerves and argue about water tasting just to feel something. Furina used freedom from godhood to take a nap and Zhongli used it to give psychic damage to anyone who talks to him longer than 5 minutes. Iconic.

kenm4vhs

johnvenus

Super Antics by Kerry Callen (link to FB):

thevirus-19

Homosexuality in the Batman franchise

I don't know what shocked me more. The fact that a Wikipedia page exists for it, or what I discovered while reading it. Honestly, it feels like a fever dream.

Anyway, here are some things I read which I found very memorable.

Don't know why I was shocked that there have been academic studies about Batman.

Three lovely quotes by Batman writers, which will live in my head rent free till the end of time.

Bat-nipples are domtext, not subtext.

George Clooney made Batman gay.

Denying that Batman is silly and campy as a concept is denying his homoerotecism.

raphfish

Something that annoys me when people discuss venat is when they debate whether or not the Sundering was justified when to me that's not the point

Her decision was flawed yes and that's the point. She needed to find a way for mankind to go forward instead of giving up in search of a past they couldn't have reclaimed, and she needed to do it before more people were sacrificed to Zodiark.

She isn't and never was the perfect god that would end mankind's suffering. And she never wanted to be that. And that's what makes her such a compelling character.

dawntrailing

spiribia: "hermes was a sad and lonely man and whenever he asked questions everyone would just laugh him off. he just wanted to know what gives life meaning. and venat was like i’ll think about your question. i’ll walk to the edge of the universe for 12000 years to answer. none else can understand the bizarre bond of kinship between them in my mind. for 10+ real life years hydaelyn’s big song was called ‘answers.’ and then they were finally like here is the guy who asked a question."

birdlord5000

next year james patterson is slapping his name on a book called "the secret lives of booksellers and librarians," which is real bold considering that every bookseller and librarian that i've met in my time as a bookseller and librarian absolutely loathes him. including me.

birdlord5000

"rowan if you hate james patterson how come you know about a book of his that's coming out seven months from now?"

I Must Keep The Scope Of My Sniper Rifle Trained On The Beast At All Times

foxofninetales

Okay, I feel the need to explain just why James Patterson is so hated by librarians.

See, it's not just that he writes mediocre, churned-out thrillers; there are many, many authors of mediocre, churned-out thrillers out there, he ain't special.

It's also not that he "writes" them with "coauthors" and slaps his name on them - again, this is not unique.

It's not even - though this is starting to get there- that he chases every publishing trend and creates His Version of everything from Diary of a Wimpy Kid to Nicholas Sparks, which nobody likes as well as they like his thrillers but still buy because they have His Name on them like a summoning charm.

No, what makes James Patterson uniquely loathed is the combination of the frequency of publication and his popularity. Because, to be honest, I'm not sure that anyone even likes his books anymore, but it doesn't matter, because if they have the James Patterson name on them then readers will be queuing up like zombies desperate for a fix of decaying cerebral matter. Which would be tolerable if he had the decency to only write one book a year like most other bestselling authors, but "James Patterson" (quotes VERY intentional) puts out roughly two books per month. So as a librarian, not only do you have to buy every new book James Patterson puts out, you have to buy multiple copies in order to fulfill demand. Somewhere around 5% of my fiction budget is spent ENTIRELY ON JAMES PATTERSON. Every new James Patterson that comes out means a dozen or more queer romances, inventive sci-fi novellas, unique cultural viewpoints, etc, etc that you can't buy because YOU HAVE TO BUY JAMES PATTERSON INSTEAD. (See also, you just weeded and shifted the Ps in fiction to make room and now it's full again oh god why.)

And the clincher - the absolute clincher - is the knowledge that the publishers will be "finding" "unfinished manuscripts" by "James Patterson" for a minimum of fifty years after his death, so even if some right-minded bibliophile with a claymore takes one for the team, we will never, ever be free.

And that is why we hate James Patterson.

iheartallthethings

I was wondering about this when i saw the first version of this post

coolxatu

can we get this guy 1 million notes

jawless-lads

Drepanaspis = peak waterproof gaming mouse

lauren-draws-things

“Often [Legolas] took Gimli with him when he went abroad in the land, and the others wondered at this change”

rainie-is-seasonchange

Sea of clouds in the morning sun.

Hiroshima, Japan.

three-atoms

Japanese paperback covers of His Dark Materials and La Belle Sauvage

Source

sleepy-bebby

Bandicoot. 🍓

bunnyalope

derinthescarletpescatarian

“If I had time travel I’d kill Hitler” “If I had time travel I’d stop my favourite politician getting assassinated” you’re all thinking way too small. If I had time travel I’d stop Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin from dying on the moon due to Soviet sabotage, kicking off the Great Nuclear War and devastating half of the planet.