🐈🏳️‍⚧️🐈‍⬛

Austin. 29. Orlando. 29. Orlando.🐈🏳️‍⚧️

[cruellesummer]

meet me at midnight

[assiraphales]

I love that heidi klum, international super model and tv personality, was like “I’m going to be a worm for halloween” and went for the most horrifying hyper realistic version possible and was quoted saying (in said worm outfit) ‘I want to put a smile on peoples faces’. ma’am I am gagging but I love that for u

[assiraphales]

she embodied it

[xaveria]

noticed my coworker was on tumblr so i told them “i like your shoelaces” and they said “never say that out loud to me”

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

*me reaping* i know i for sure did not sow this much no way all this was me

[onmidnights]

Taylor Swift | Capital One

[reputayswift]

hIiiIiigh infide-lit-y put on your re-cords and re-gret meet-ing-me I bent the truth too fAaar to-night I was dancin’ around dancin’ around it

[caesarsaladinn]

every morning i wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made

[bgm05]

[despite-everything]

just found the funniest stickers to put on my car

[gay-irl]

gay_irl

[unclefather]

cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

old people: let me speak to your manager. This never would have happened in my day. And yet you all want the minimum wage raised. I’m going to kill you.

cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

millennials: okay, my apologies. I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sorry I’m here.

[chasing-asterion]

me, walking into a store: are you guys busy? i can come back later. please don’t push yourselves on my account. things happen

[heatherleigh02-deactivated20230]

Had a baby boomer in front of me at the Dairy Queen. She INSISTED she was a Blizzard EXPERT and there was simply NOT ENOUGH chocolate pieces in her blizzard and she wanted to complain to "whoever is in charge". She's going on and on with this teenager. The teenager is calmly explaining they make them all the same etc etc procedure etc etc. But this woman is now yelling at the teen.

So I walk past the woman and put money in teen's tip jar. Haven't even gotten ice cream yet.

Woman looks at me. Turns back and yells some more with the teen. I put more money in the tip jar.

The teen smiles at me. The woman can't think of what to say to me and stops yelling, because I'm looking at her dead in the eye like "atm is over there, I can go all night. The more you yell at her, the more money she makes."

[aplatonicjacuzzi]

Aggressive generosity to combat boomer selfishness is so punk

[badjokesbyjeff]

What happens when you put a lot of LGBT people in a long line?

You get a LGBTQ.

[ozzten57]

It’s been three years but I’m back?

[cutekittensarefun]

plonk

[kittiesatemypronouns]

<3 <3 <3 !!

[catsuggest]

short tutorial how to plonk

[hydro-homies]

A Good Old-Fashioned Midwestern Apocalypse

[porterr-robinson]

[culturecafe-moved]

[laharl-sama]

[honeyycurl]

This is very important if you’re ever in a situation similar this pretend that you’re dead don’t scream and @#!*%

[twevara]

my dad told us this if someone shoots up our school

SUPER IMPORTANT

BEST TIP

PLEASE REMEMBER THIS

[shrinking-ulzzang-deactivated20]

not even a joke we learned this in Police Explorers and put it on your clothing as well but go quickly because you don’t know where the person is.

[bootleg-firework-deactivated201]

This is what school children in America are taught. That is so wrong on so many fucking levels and there are still people who believe gun control in any form is a bad thing.

let me reiterate SCHOOL CHILDREN IN A SUPPOSEDLY FIRST WORLD COUNTRY ARE TAUGHT THE SAME THINGS AS PEOPLE IN ACTIVE WAR ZONES BECAUSE THE THREAT OF BEING KILLED IN A SHOOTING IS SO HIGH.

[starcrossedcherik-deactivated20]

the bit in caps here is making me rethink my stance on gun control 

shit

[appropriately-inappropriate]

I’m reblogging this because as my follower count goes up, the odds of this saving a life do too.

[bronzewitchhazel]

My elementary school had drills telling us what to do in such an emergency. This is exactly what they told us. AND NOW FOR A FACT: IN CALIFORNIA YOU DO NOT HAVE TO REGISTER A SHOTGUN!