[candyredterezii]

people should just reply to anon hate with this

[gnusnoteunuchs]

damn dude thats brutal

[gaminginthescorseseyears]

[cynicgovernor-deactivated201605]

paininspades started following you

[cynicgovernor-deactivated201605]

I’M KARKAT VANTAS, HEIR TO THE THRONE.

PLEASE STATE YOUR NAME, PURPOSE AND BLOOD COLOR.

[paininspades]

Heh.  Cute.

Spades Slick, eh, and I ain't like ya trolls with yer blood color fetish so I don't think that's necessary information.

[paininspades]

azulinezonure said: DO YOU H4V3 4NY 4DV1C3 ON HOW TO C1V1LLY D34L W1TH DRUNK P3OPL3?

  Depends on what yer definition of civil is.

[paininspades]

Hello ta th' new people

What can I help ya with?

[paininspades]

HEY THERE, SLICK. <3<

Th’ fick have ya been?

[paininspades]

"Then ya have no one ta blame but yerself for this," Slick replied before reaching down and giving the underside of Karkat’s pants and underwear a firm grip and tear, ripping the cloth and exposing his nook as well as a good deal of his rear end.  "There we go."  Not wanting to give the emperor time to react the carapacian quickly plunged his middle and ring fingers into the troll’s nook right to the knuckle, thrusting the digits in and out at a vigorous pace.

"How’s this?" Slick growled, arm wrapped around Karkat’s neck getting a tighter grip as he did so.

[biolumiking-blog]

Oh, fuck! He gasped and took a sharp breath at the way his fingers were moving so perfectly inside of him. Shit, why did it have to feel this fucking good? Karkat arched his back, trying his best not to moan so loudly like he wanted to. He couldn’t let Slick win, but god, it was getting harder and harder to resist him. His bulge was already fully unsheated and slithering about, wanting contact. It didn’t help that Slick found out his biggest kink: asphyxiation.

He closed his eyes and shuddered, letting out shaky breaths and whimpers, biting so hard down on his lip that a little tyrian blood slipped out and dribbled down his chin. “…harder.. I..” He couldn’t say it. That he wanted more. “I-I can.. barely… f-feel a thing~” That should coax him further. His voice was soft at the tightening. Thank god he couldn’t see his face from this angle. Karkat’s face was a bright tyrian, eyes closed in pleasure and pain.

[paininspades]

"That so?" Slick asked, gripping tighter around the troll's neck while slipping another finger inside Karkat's nook.  At the same time his thumb began to squeeze and tease the base of the emperor's bulge.  "I wonder how lon' it'll take ya ta tell me ta EASE UP on ya... hm..."  A few quick, sudden squeezes to Karkat's bulge followed his statement, chuckling as he did so.

[madmothmiko-deactivated20151126]

Tegaki: TKKI

[paininspades]

Question for all of you Tumblr artists

This is how most of you guys tend to act, right?  XD

http://art.penny-arcade.com/photos/i-gL7sBZg/0/1050x10000/i-gL7sBZg-1050x10000.jpg

[paininspades]

HEY THERE, SLICK. <3<

Th’ fick have ya been?

[paininspades]

"Well I ain’t gonna repeat that," Slick replied, growling pleasurably as he felt the troll’s nails down his neck.  "It ain’t fun doin’ it when ya expect it… what ta do what ta do…"  He pondered for a few moments, looking off into space as he continued to draw shallow fuchsia lines on the emperor’s skin in a somewhat absent-minded fashion.  Finally his face lit up and he gave Karkat a grin comparable to his own.  "I think I got an idea…"  With that said he pulled his hands out from under Karkat’s shirt and immediately pushed the troll onto his stomach, laying down on top of him and wrapping his arm around the front of the other’s neck.  "I think yer gonna enjoy this," Slick murmured softly, his voice a gruff whisper as he began to give Karkat’s left fin teasing nibbles.

[biolumiking-blog]

He could only gasp, shaking in Slick’s hands as he was pushed to his stomach. Karkat shuddered and arched his back to him, hands clawing at the ground. His ass pressed back against Slick’s crotch. With the hands on his throat, he gasped, coughing a little bit before smirking, his fin wiggling slightly. “Then get on with it. I don’t like having to wait, peasant~” he whispered, wiggling his ass backwards.

[paininspades]

"Then ya have no one ta blame but yerself for this," Slick replied before reaching down and giving the underside of Karkat's pants and underwear a firm grip and tear, ripping the cloth and exposing his nook as well as a good deal of his rear end.  "There we go."  Not wanting to give the emperor time to react the carapacian quickly plunged his middle and ring fingers into the troll's nook right to the knuckle, thrusting the digits in and out at a vigorous pace.

"How's this?" Slick growled, arm wrapped around Karkat's neck getting a tighter grip as he did so.

[kururuyakku]

A little moan escapes your mouth, your back arching. You take a few seconds to get used, your breathing gradually getting faster, at last parting your shaking legs a little more and delicately putting them on his shoulders.

[paininspades]

He dragged his sharpened fingertips gently down her thighs as she put her legs on his shoulders, humming happily at how much fun he was having.  ”Lovely… now lets put this little guy somewhere that’ll keep him in one place, yeah?”  With that he reached down to the ground with his right hand and pulled up a small roll of clear tape, tearing off and little and proceeding to tape the vibrating bullet directly to her clit.  ”There - how’s that?”

[kururuyakku]

Your wings twitch in pleasure before spreading, a loud and long groan crawling up your throat. Your legs are shaking against his shoulders, and you’re not quite able to give him an answer, your mind kind of drifting off.

[paininspades]

"Still with me darlin'?" Slick asked, looking up to give her a slightly confused look.  "Oh, this gettin' th' better of ya already?"  He chuckled a little at that before reaching up to give her left nipple a pinch to try and get her more focused.  "This ain't gonna ruin ya or nothin', will it?  That'd be bad."

[paininspades]

Catching Up

[kururuyakku]

You chuckle as you slide your hand in his, a rather joyful but calm expression on her face.

Oh, you’ll know everything when I tell you.

[paininspades]

"And when will ya tell me?" Slick asked as he led her to a seat at the dining room table, a plate filled with a wide assortment of veggies with small containers of various dips lined up along its side.  "That’s for ya - want anythin’ ta drink in particular?"

[kururuyakku]

I could tell you now.

Your smile widens a little when you see the vegetables, and you sit down at the seat he led you to, and you look up at him as you think.

Hm well, I could take water, simply.

[paininspades]

"I'm all ears then," Slick replied, walking back into the kitchen to fetch a pitcher and glass and fill them each with water and ice.  He came back in without his suit coat - he wouldn't be doing anymore work that day so there was no need to be so well-dressed for the time being - and set the pitcher and glass beside her plate.  He took a seat beside her and gestured to the food and drink.  "Help yerself, and fill me in when yer good and ready."

[paininspades]

"Yer body and YER damned fool," Slick replied cheekily, hands now travelling up and down her sides delicately.  After a few moments of this passed he moved his hands down further and cupped her behind in them, gently lifting her off the chair and then turning around to set her down on the desktop under which he had been hiding previously.  "Now…" he began to say as he slid up her skirt to give her bare ass a firm but affectionate squeezing.  "What shall I do ta ya?  Or what shall ya do ta me?"  He smirked and leaned forward to press a few more quick kisses to her lips.

"I’m always open for suggestions… and ya certainly do deserve SOME kinda reward for puttin’ up with me that entire meetin’, yeah?  So come on love - direct th’ director and see where this little scene of ours goes."

[hasnowmoved-deactivated20141019]

Damara huffed at his cheeky comment to her, her eyes narrowing slightly despite the small smirk that resided on her lips at his wandering hands. His fingertips seemed to ghost over her pale grey flesh, making a slight shiver ripple through her; she always was a tad bit ticklish when his fingers drifted over her body. She huffed again when he lifted her up, moving her to where she was now sitting on the conference table, a pout taking the place of her lips. “How very unorthodox…” She mumbled, a finely manicured hand pushing a strand of hair from her face, her crimson eyes watching him as he was to her. “Do to me?” She repeated, grasping the arm that dared to squeeze her behind with no restraint or decency, only to smirk at the rest of his words, her fingers sliding up the arm she had held teasingly. “I like the sound of that. You were naughty after all for abandoning me in this hellish meeting only to have turned up anyway…How cruel.” She feigned hurt, welcoming his quick kiss.

"You are damned right I do, you are a menace!" She chuckled when he claimed that she did deserve a reward, soon tilting her head when he gave the control over to her. This had only occurred a few times in the past since their little affair had begun, though it wasn’t as if either party didn’t enjoy because they did. She flicked her gaze around the room, absent-mindedly stroking her heeled foot up and down his leg, leaning back on her hands alluringly; she would take her sweet time as she thought of things to do. "Anything I like?" She questioned, her voice a lusty purr, her eyes shining in delight, "absolutely anything?”

[paininspades]

"I'm YER menace," Slick teased right back, his gruff chuckle joining her own.  "And don't try ta act like ya don't love it."  He was fairly amused by just how much thought she was putting into his offer, soft smile curling up as she gave off all of her little mannerisms - the lean, the micro-managing of her hair, and especially the stroking heel going up and down his leg.

He gave her a coy look as her tone and complexion shifted again, cocking a brow as he moved to sit beside her on top of the table.  "I know that look of yers," he pointed out cheekily, resting a hand on her thigh and giving it an affectionate rub.  "If ya got somethin' in mind, tell me darlin' - I'm prolly inclined ta agree ta whatever plan ya've got."

[andykluthe]

This comic was rearranged and reduced to better fit Tumblr’s strict image size restrictions.  I’d personally suggest reading it on my website.

——

The One Who Skreeonks Godzilla and Bryan Cranston is the best combination since chocolate met peanut butter. Like what you read? Visit Nerd Rage for more! Comic updated weekly. And don’t forget to like Nerd Rage on Facebook and follow us on Twitter.

[cascadianstuntman-deactivated20]

My friend just texted me this and I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard.

[preppin-asian]

Kayla’s reaction to OUAT S3 Finale

[paininspades]

HEY THERE, SLICK. <3<

Th’ fick have ya been?

[paininspades]

"Fair enough," Slick said, shrugging lightly before suddenly hooking his left lower leg behind Karkat’s own and giving his chest a hard back and then down towards the ground.  Once the ruler was on his back Slick immediately took a seat on his stomach, slipping his hands under the young troll’s shirt and dragging light fuchsia lines up his stomach with his sharp fingertips.  "So that didn’t hurt ya too much, yeah?"

[biolumiking-blog]

Of course it hurt. He shuddered and hissed, trying to get up, but soon there was Slick.. sitting on his stomach and his back arched away from his fingers at first before he gave Slick a grin, grabbing his shoulders and moving them up to his neck before pushing him back, nails dragging down the sides of his neck. “I didn’t even.. f-feel a think.” His voice was soft. “Try again.” A large grin was on his face as his fins wiggled, excited for what Slick would do.

[paininspades]

"Well I ain't gonna repeat that," Slick replied, growling pleasurably as he felt the troll's nails down his neck.  "It ain't fun doin' it when ya expect it... what ta do what ta do..."  He pondered for a few moments, looking off into space as he continued to draw shallow fuchsia lines on the emperor's skin in a somewhat absent-minded fashion.  Finally his face lit up and he gave Karkat a grin comparable to his own.  "I think I got an idea..."  With that said he pulled his hands out from under Karkat's shirt and immediately pushed the troll onto his stomach, laying down on top of him and wrapping his arm around the front of the other's neck.  "I think yer gonna enjoy this," Slick murmured softly, his voice a gruff whisper as he began to give Karkat's left fin teasing nibbles.

[paininspades]

HEY THERE, SLICK. <3<

Th’ fick have ya been?

[paininspades]

Slick grunted a little at the bite before chuckling a bit and roughly gripping the troll’s hair in his fist.  ”Don’t go puttin’ any marks on me boy - shells take some time ta get rid of marks like that.  Now tell me - just how tough are ya?  In terms of gettin’ manhandled and th’ like.”

[biolumiking-blog]

Having his hair pulled, he let out a shaky moan, not used to being treated so roughly.. But fucking christ, he loved it. He loved it better than anything. With a small smirk that wideend with each word, he said “I think I can handle it way better than you think I can. I’m the emperor. I deal with tough shit all the time. I didn’t just get here. I worked my place here. And I’ll be damned if a peasant like you can rough me up.”

[paininspades]

"Fair enough," Slick said, shrugging lightly before suddenly hooking his left lower leg behind Karkat's own and giving his chest a hard back and then down towards the ground.  Once the ruler was on his back Slick immediately took a seat on his stomach, slipping his hands under the young troll's shirt and dragging light fuchsia lines up his stomach with his sharp fingertips.  "So that didn't hurt ya too much, yeah?"