[catneep]

[cutekittensarefun]

Cats are programmed to get UP IN YOUR FACE between 4am and 6am. We may never know why

[uwiguwi]

if you’re reading this

a lump sum of money is on the way to you

[uwiguwi]

it happened today, damn that was like 3 days maybe?

It Works the money is on its way!

[goodluckrob-deactivated20221110]

Need this.

[mindyourbusinessitsfree]

Of course

[sauvamente]

It worked tho

[writing-reigns-deactivated20200]

Hit me, universe

[zzdigital]

What if someone got bitten by a vampire, but didn’t realize it. So then they go around and keep misidentifying all the symptoms, like

“Dude, you haven’t gone outside in a while.” “Yeah, last time I went out I got this wicked sunburn.”

“Are you still up?” “Yeah, I started bing watching this show on Netflix.”

“Dude, I’m seriously craving something right now.” “Like what?” “I dunno. Pizza rolls?”

[adriofthedead]

“Why is it that you never come into my house unless I invite you?” “Um, it’s called ‘being polite’…?”

[paulichu]

“I tried cooking with garlic the other night and got this serious burn on my hand. I think I’m allergic, but all I’m getting on Google is vampire bullshit.”

[samarajournal]

“Dude can a mirror like… stop working or something?”

[espeoradar]

“Dude, why do you keep posting pictures of the floor?” “…Those are meant to be selfies, I guess my camera must be broken.”

“Dude, I am all for you expressing your religious beliefs, but could you not wear your crucifix when I’m around? It really bugs me for some reason.”

[recondite-room]

“Have you ever noticed how cute bats are? like really noticed? sweet lil balls of fluff with wings man.”

[nickthepigeon]

“I want to sleep in a coffin…ya kno, for like… aesthetic”

[therightprometheanfire]

“What’s with your thing about necks lately?”

“MUST YOU KINKSHAME ME IN MY OWN HOME”

[hopetimistic]

“I looked up my symptoms on WebMD, and it says I have cancer.”

[samwise-the-true-hero-deactivat]

This last addition made the reblog obligatory. This one wins.

[cloacacarnage]

i know its the mets, but this is the coolest shit i’ve ever seen a human being do

[futureblackwakandan-deactivated]

Wtf????

[theryanproject]

Smoove with it too 

[meqabitch-deactivated20200901]

This is the kind of shit you see in anime that shows that a certain character is stronger than other characters. 

[bankuei]

“Pathetic.  You can’t even hold the bat you dare step to the plate? Have you no respect for the sport?”

[pardonmewhileipanic]

reminds me of this gif

[sueanoi]

[batter-sempai]

Baseball players are to be feared

[cynosurecosplay]

[thenamesdede]

Reblogging for the last one

[saito-91]

^Same for me

[nat-20s]

Honestly I really wish instead of losing all her memories post season 4 Donna had been like temporarily displaced or some other handwavey scifi bullshit so that she could've been a River Song or Master type character where she just shows up sometimes and The Doctor is like DONNA MY BEST FRIEND DONNA and their current companion(s) is like "Whomst??? The fuck????" while Donna is just like "ey oh what's POPPIN"

[greytune]

#god this #can you imagine catherine tate #just showing up in a fucking nebula #doctor's all like DONNA SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! #HOW'S IT GOING #same old same old seeing the wonders of the universe through involuntary and unpredictable time-space travel #you? #oh you know seeing the wonders of the universe through voluntary but still unpredictable time-space travel #new companion's like *what are you* #Donna: I'm a temp

[justhereforthespn]

I would kill for this. Donna’s ending fucking ripped my heart out.

[driflloon]

What she says: I’m fine

What she means: In Legally Blonde, Elle only gets accepted because she’s hot and sent a video, but she had a 4.0 and got a 179 (out of 180) on her LSATS. Sure, her major was in Fashion Merchandising but that’s a business major, and the fake school she was at was supposed to be UCLA so she had a business degree from a major college, probably went to a great high school, had a 4.0, and a 179 on the LSATS and at that point she would have been automatically accepted so why did they make it sound like she was such a bad risk? She even had leadership experience as president of a major chapter of what is apparently a huge sorority, since Delta Nus are shown as everything from cheerleaders to senators. Harvard should have been desperate to take her. She should have been able to get in if she turned in a cocktail napkin with her name written on it. So why make up the bullshit excuse of “multiculturalism” to justify letting in an extremely qualified and highly driven candidate just for laughs? Elle Woods deserved to go to Harvard and she earned that place with academic excellence and not by being hot.

[dragonprincessmew]

In my defense, your honor, I really am the dumbest bitch alive

[parkchanwoohoo]

a little kid came up to the desk (it came up to his like, collarbone) and very seriously asked me about baby name books, because he wanted to help name his new sibling. i guided him to the shelf (there were only two book of names) and pointed out the differences between them, and after some serious contemplation he went, “I think I should take both, just in case.” So I gave him both and he thanked me and went on his way.

And I went back to my desk and screamed into my arm for like 45 years because HE WAS SO FUCKING ADORABLE AAAAA

[parkchanwoohoo]

i love when little kids come to the reference desk alone because they want to be perceived as an adult and so they come up to you and very seriously inquire “Where are your books about dolphins? ò__ó”

and of course you have to very seriously show them your collection of dolphin books while they nod carefully at your explanations and it’s SO CUTE!!! THEY’RE SO CUTE AAAH

[lavellanlove]

So is it just me, or does every new owner of Tumblr getting announced feel like we’re getting a new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher?

[anxietyproblem]

[jupiterlicivciv]

[squided]

this is my favorite flagged post at the moment 

[pglang]

due to personal reasons i need a hug

[retrogamingblog]

Pokemon Balloon Pins made by HelloDawnCo

[4444555666777888999]

Um no offense but why doesn’t anyone memorize passages from books and then recite them aloud for everyone at parties anymore.

[mynameismeowmeow]

We memorize vines, the office, and John mulaney segments instead, war has changes but humanity has not

[charlesoberonn]

The myth of Achilles, but instead of holding him by the heel, Thetis sumberges him fully so that Achilles is completely invulnerable and Thetis has one invulnerable hand.

[charlesoberonn]

She only needs one oven mitt when taking cookies out of the oven.

[aphony-cree]

But there would still be two small parts of him that are vulnerable because they were covered by her fingertips at the time, stopping the water from touching them. Which means those fingertips are also vulnerable on her hand 

Achilles *putting those little round band-aids on two parts of his ankle before battle*

Thetis *knitting fingertip oven mitts for her thumb and forefinger*

This is a Greek comedy I could get behind 

[obaewankenope]

What if she put him in a sack and dunked him in? The water would saturate the sack and soak him and so long as she pulled him out quick, he wouldn't drown. Then they'd have a sack that's invulnerable too and can be used as the most unexpected shield ever.

Imagine Achilles storming Troy with one (1) invulnerable sack for a shield

[adspexi]

thetis just sticks him in one of these bad boys

and swirls him around like a batch of chicken nuggets until he’s invulnerable all over.