wish i was a bot

[snakeater-deactivated20260130]

yeah i couldn’t be trusted with a penis id get hard from the way the sun shines through the leaves and everyone would hate me

[0fficelady]

Collection

[ratfuck]

I put a smell on you

[markingatlightspeed]

cats when they headbutt you

[zackisontumblr]

and now you’re mine

[ubercharge]

[memewhore]

[cannibalchicken]

[fruityyamenrunner]

something charmingly twentieth century about this

[ieg]

literally all of these r me. im wikipedia bf

[olt-deactivated20180224]

[akaiiros]

this actually is rewiring my brain as we speak

[lilacandladybugs]

my friend told me that her boyfriend got her a super cool rock while they were on vacation together and you would not BELIEVE my disappointment when i realized she was talking about her engagement ring

[lilacandladybugs]

*holds your head in my hands* im sorry i let you down

[tchaikovskaya]

[were--ralph]

Tweet of the year

[shitacademicswrite]

[somarysueme]

[wishuponastarion]

"oh sorry, i guess i was infodumping again" - sad, shy, apologetic

"you sly dog, you got me monologuing" - cool, strong, confident

[caats]

As she should ♡

[selfhealingmoments]