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Tumblr Sexyman Contest 2026 Round 1 Part 59

Ted Shackleford (Curious George)

Sans (Undertale)

Remaining time: 7 hours 51 minutes

pettycrafter

I was entirely obsessed with Curious George as a kid. How is this the first time I’m hearing that the Man in the Yellow Hat had a last name?!? Here?!? From the Tumblr Sexyman Contest?!?

#what the hell

shimamitsu

some of my favorite replies to this tweet. happy lesbian visibility week!

djinnkala

Happy pride month, statement!! 🏳️‍🌈

iheartvelma

via

aroace-ryland-grace

I took this video at like 3 am last night and I can't stop laughing at it...whatever. go my rocky

aroace-ryland-grace

@itsjustmebluesilly your wish is my command. woe ! rocky be upon ye

Quick WIP update, I finally finished the foxes! I’m still uncertain on whether they are totally identifiable or not, but they’re growing on me. It took SO LONG to do these last 14 rows, Organic Chemistry has been eating up my summer!

#knitting #wip wednesday #phm movie #ryland grace #project hail mary #organic chemistry

raffa-taff

Headcanon that Grace loves grossing Rocky out for the funniest

clarenecessities

there’s something endlessly hilarious to me about the phrase “hotly debated” in an academic context. like i just picture a bunch of nerds at podiums & one’s like “of course there was a paleolithic bear cult in Northern Eurasia” and another one just looks him in the eye and says “i’l kill you in real life, kevin”

crockpotcauldron

ossacordis

I heard a story once about two microbiologists at a conference who took it out into the parking lot to have a literal fistfight over taxonomy.

winchysteria

have i told this story yet? idk but it’s good. The Orangutan Story:

my american lit professor went to this poe conference. like to be clear this is a man who has a doctorate in being a book nerd. he reads moby dick to his four-year-old son. and poe is one of the cornerstones of american literature, right, so this should be right up his alley?

wrong. apparently poe scholars are like, advanced. there is a branch of edgar allen poe scholarship that specifically looks for coded messages based on the number of words per line and letters per word poe uses. my professor, who has a phd in american literature, realizes he is totally out of his depth. but he already committed his day to this so he thinks fuck it! and goes to a panel on racism in poe’s works, because that’s relevant to his interests.

background info: edgar allen poe was a broke white alcoholic from virginia who wrote horror in the first half of the 19th century. rule 1 of Horror Academia is that horror reflects the cultural anxieties of its time (see: my other professor’s sermon abt how zombie stories are popular when people are scared of immigrants, or that purge movie that was literally abt the election). since poe’s shit is a product of 1800s white southern culture, you can safely assume it’s at least a little about race. but the racial subtext is very open to interpretation, and scholars believe all kinds of different things about what poe says about race (if he says anything), and the poe stans get extremely tense about it.

so my professor sits down to watch this panel and within like five minutes a bunch of crusty academics get super heated about poe’s theoretical racism. because it’s academia, though, this is limited to poorly concealed passive aggression and forceful tones of inside voice. one professor is like “this isn’t even about race!” and another professor is like “this proves he’s a racist!” people are interrupting each other. tensions are rising. a panelist starts saying that poe is like writing a critique of how racist society was, and the racist stuff is there to prove that racism is stupid, and that on a metaphorical level the racist philosophy always loses—

then my professor, perhaps in a bid to prove that he too is a smart literature person, loudly calls: “BUT WHAT ABOUT THE ORANGUTAN?”

some more background: in poe’s well-known short story “the murder in the rue morgue,” two single ladies—a lovely old woman and her lovely daughter who takes care of her, aka super vulnerable and respectable people—are violently killed. the murderer turns out to be not a person, but an orangutan brought back by a sailor who went to like burma or something. and it’s pretty goddamn racially coded, like they reeeeally focus on all this stuff about coarse hairs and big hands and superhuman strength and chattering that sounds like people talking but isn’t actually. if that’s intentional, then he’s literally written an analogy about how black people are a threat to vulnerable white women, which is classic white supremacist shit. BUT if he really only meant for it to be an orangutan, then it’s a whole other metaphor about how colonialism pillages other countries and brings their wealth back to europe and that’s REALLY gonna bite them in the ass one day. klansman or komrade? it all hangs on this.

much later, when my professor told this story to a poe nerd friend, the guy said the orangutan thing was a one of the biggest landmines in their field. he said it was a reliable discussion ruiner that had started so many shouting matches that some conferences had an actual ban on bringing it up.

so the place goes dead fucking silent as every giant ass poe stan in the room is immediately thrust into a series of war flashbacks: the orangutan argument, violently carried out over seminar tables, in literary journals, at graduate student house parties, the spittle flying, the wine and coffee spilled, the friendships torn—the red faces and bulging veins—curses thrown and teaching posts abandoned—panels just like this one fallen into chaos—distant sirens, skies falling, the dog-eared norton critical editions slicing through the air like sabres—the textual support! o, the quotes! they gaze at this madman in numb disbelief, but he could not have known. nay, he was a literary theorist, a 17th-century man, only a visitor to their haunted land. he had never heard the whistle of the mortars overhead. he had never felt the cold earth under his cheek as he prayed for god’s deliverance. and yet he would have broken their fragile peace and brought them all back into the trenches.

my professor sits there for a second, still totally clueless. the panel moderator suddenly stands up in his tweed jacket and yells, with the raw panic of a once-broken man:

WE! DO NOT! TALK ABOUT! THE ORANGUTAN!

forochel

forever reblog

t00thpasteface

involuntarily going where no man has gone before

Progress on my Project Hail Mary sweater! This is the first project that I’ve designed from scratch, so I’m a little anxious. I loved the sweater in the movie, but I figured I needed to clear out my stash :|

Seriously, this movie is consuming my every waking moment….at least now I have a creative outlet for it!

#wip wednesday #project hail mary #phm movie #knitting #ryland grace

3000s

tumblr giveaway

reblog to win one of that

orphelia4

Alone together

sermna

trying to figure out how many times I can bring this movie up in conversation before people start avoiding me

existencebringsonlypain

i need data for a statistics project for school, so be my sample data, worms. i need thirty people minimum so if there aren't enough voters yet i'd love if you could help. thank you very much. worms.

take this test (https://www.keithcirkel.co.uk/whats-my-jnd/), then come back here:

what's your JND?

.00030-.00099

.0010-.0017

.0017-.0024

.0024-.0031

.0031-.0038

.0038-.0045

.0045-.0052

.0052-.0059

.0059-.0066

.0066-.0073

.0073-.0080

.0080 or greater

Voting ended onMay 13

it doesnt have to be a good score, you dont have to take it multiple times, you dont have to get on a good screen, etcetera. just gimme your score please this is my final project grade :)

i'd love if you could reblog for reach

daysleftofsecondterm

Beautiful, you don’t HAVE to forgive them. You just can’t ridicule them after leaving for being “tainted” or “evil” or whatever the acceptable word is now. Do not punish the behaviour you want to see.

“But they should’ve known sooner” and we should’ve known sooner that Destiel was never gonna meaningfully happen outside of queerbaiting, what’s your point?

“I never want them near me” that’s fine, but you do realize to insult them, YOU have to get near THEM, right? Wouldn’t it be more conducive to what you want to just leave each other alone?

“What if one of them tries to approach me?” Then you block them online, or you keep the conversation clinical and polite irl. You do NOT take time out of your day to berate them for their old views. Your mother raised you better than that.

jame-dumb

Preserving these tags, they're very correct

llamaking

I would reblog this one million times if I could

daysleftofsecondterm

As a matter of fact you can!

ink-in-hand

This is fundamentally how cults WORK, btw

Villainize outsiders, which can look different depending on the cult, make everything an us vs them situation. And then when those outsiders show themselves to be hostile (doesn't matter why) the cult is proven right all along on one of their foundational messages