The only time Leorio ever dreamed was when Kurapika stayed over. As an overworked med student, all he usually had to do was fall onto his mattress and close his eyes before darkness would envelop him until the next morning, when the whole cycle of class, clinicals, and home would repeat. No time for dreaming when every minute of your day was a struggle. Sleep was actually for sleep. If anything, Kurapika was the one who would dream. Nightmares really. He’d gently shake him awake from his soft cries, and after the third or fourth time this happened, Leorio asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” was his quick response.
He’d tried again after the sixth time and received a troubled gaze, followed by a sigh. “My past. Sometimes I dream about … my clan.”
Leorio didn’t push. That was a wound too deep for him to heal. He nodded and kissed his forehead. They went back to sleep.
But one evening, after Kurapika showed up on his doorstep, looking exhausted, with blood coloring his blond strands, Leorio had his first dream. After leading him inside, he’d washed the red from his hair and guided him into bed. They fell asleep, but hours later, he woke panting, with Kurapika staring at him wide-eyed. “What? Where am I?” Leorio asked, hair disheveled, with slick sweat dripping down his chest.
“You're in your apartment … with me,” Kurapika answered, pressing a cool hand against his hot cheek.
Vague puzzle pieces were scattered inside his mind, ones full of fear, longing, and dismay, without him being able to snap them all into place to form a picture. It kept happening each time he stayed over, with Kurapika offering him the same stunned expression. If only he could remember.
One evening, after yet another sleep disturbance forced them both awake, Kurapika offered a clue that, once given, made Leorio realize the other had known the dreams' true contents all along. “Perhaps I can help.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I know you’re worried about me, about …” Kurapika hesitated, biting his lip, “about what I do. And … if anything should ever happen to me, well, I feel like you should know that I … I love you too, Leorio.”
“Love me … too?” He’d never dared speak those words to him before. Leorio just knew he’d race for the door in an instant. Never see him again. This weird situationship of theirs over in an instant.
But no, here he was, saying it first.
In the dark room, Kurapika’s irises shifted to a light pink, his eyes softening with a knowing look before he leaned over and gently kissed Leorio’s lips. “Try and get some rest.”
It was difficult, but he eventually found peace again with Kurapika in his arms, and when early morning light streamed through his window blinds, drawing him from bed, Leorio finally understood the truth.
And after that night, he neither dreamed nor spoke in his sleep again when Kurapika stayed over.
Also for anyone who likes Severance I think Pantheon on Netflix does equally as amazing a job with a topic that is similar. (this would go both ways, both should be watched)
It's same level tension with a bit more horror and it's animated and it's exactly up the alley of Severance fans. (namely, me)
Instead of Severance however, it asks the question: what if we could put people into technology?
Media workings on technology horror is my favorite genre.
ill never forget the dream i had about this show on nickelodeon that was kind of like malcom in the middle and even stevens and it was called Bitchboy Naughty and like every time they went to a commercial it would fade out w/ kids singing “Bitchboy naughtyyyyyy’ i wish u could hear this tune bc its been stuck in my head for months
I've been meaning to make a post talking about my stroke because y'all got bits and pieces of the recovery but I never actually told the story of HOW it went down and the thing is the type of stroke I had is usually the type young people have and since having mine i've now heard multiple stories of people under 40 having very similar strokes and the scary thing is, is that they didn't get help right away. Because you're young and healthy and sure you feel weird but it'll pass right? but it doesn't, and it gets worse, and by the time you get to the hospital (some people literally take days to go) the deficits are worse and recovery is harder.
so here's a super long post about strokes in general, and mine in particular/what I went through.
So for strokes the signs are abbreviated BE FAST. Balance loss, Eyesight changes, Face drooping, Arm weakness, Speech difficulty, -> Time to call 911.
Had I known those MAYBE I would have figured it out but my symptoms were a little mixed. I was reading (fanfic!) in bed because it was a sunday morning and i had nothing pressing to do and suddenly got dizzy. I put my laptop aside because my eyes were blurring (Eyesight changes - symptom #1), and laid down, thinking it would pass, it didn't, it's a little vague how it progressed because I'd been having headaches and neckpain for about 3 weeks leading up to it so I was like 'idk is this a migraine?' (headaches can be a stroke symptom so symptom #2) but i got nauseous and eventually got up and to my utmost surprise I immediately fell over as if I was the drunkest of frat bros. The room literally spun before my eyes as I fell to the floor (Balance loss - symptom #3). I have had some Nights and I had never been that unsteady before. I crawled my way to the bathroom, threw up (nausea - not a common stroke symptom) , took 800mg of ibuprofen, and crawled back to bed.
if you know anything about ibuprofen you might know it's a mild blood thinner and that's a high dose. I may have inadvertently helped myself with that one. I was just feeling like shit and thinking 'idk this might help'
At this point I still thought we were still in Normal Land. Sure, it was a weird morning, but Surely There Was A Reason. (Yes There Was) Anyway, as I'm lying there willing my body to stop suffering I realize my arm is going numb (stroke symptom #4) and I switch positions, because weird, but it doesn't go away, and I gave it a good little while. I'm on a medication that can make my limbs tingle but it usually just does it to my fingers and it dissipates quickly but this wasn't dissipating, and then I realized one of my legs was also going numb. Then one side of my face is going numb.
(at the time I did not look in the mirror but I had a drooping eyelid - symptom #5)
Those all seem bad. I grab my computer and google 'when to go to the hospital for dizzyness' as that felt like the worst of my problems. and indeed the list I found highlighted that if you are also experiencing loss of balance, blurred vision, nausea, and limb numbness, you should see a doctor. That seems like far too many symptoms to be having all to be listed. I grab my phone (thankfully plugged in and by my bed), and start layering on more clothing because it's about 10 degrees out and i'm in a pajama dress. The very nice man at 911 talks with me and sends an ambulance, I tell him I don't think I can get out the front door of my building on my own and he asks if I can get to MY apartment door to which I say yes and he assures me that's fine they will have keys to my building.
(I have been since informed they love to chop down doors but no, I could get that far)
I wait by my door laying down on the ground and they arrive pretty quickly. They see to me in the hallway, which is more of a lobby in my building and the only place with room for me to lie down (I cannot stand unassisted at this point) they ask me a bunch of questions, take vitals, and ask me where I would like to be taken. Me, having never had to go to the fucking hospital in an emergency before, simply go 'wherever is close' because I again, I am having a stroke and do not have the wherewithal to think through these things.
A big firefighter helps me down the stairs (it's only a half flight and I still almost did not make it) and we get underway.
At the hospital they wheel me into triage and I mostly lie there gratefully and answer some questions and respond to some tests (grip strength, following a pen with my eyes, that sort of thing) and then I hear what is great when you've been at urgent care for two hours but what is Very Bad when you just arrived in an ambulance and that's 'She's next'. I jumped the line for a CT scan and an MRI. I was there less than ten minutes before I was actively being scanned. honestly closer to five.
my active symptoms seem to have been worse than some of the stories I've heard, not being able to walk AT ALL in particular, although some other are pretty equal (Footless Jo on youtube had a stroke around the same time I did of the same type and has discussed hers, she delayed going in despite the severity for a variety of reasons and it sounds like her recovery has been difficult) My recovery was pretty easy because i was actively being cared for and on blood thinners right away. My stroke was caused by an vertebral arterial tear, aka the inner part of an artery tore which can cause a clot. This tends to be the type of stroke young people have although I'm sure it's possible to have a different type.
I was pretty out of it in the beginning, but I was only in the hospital for 6 days and then in a rehab for another 4 to relearn how to walk and balance, then i was released unto the world and just spent time going to physical therapy and recovering for awhile. I was out of work for about 8 weeks total. I basically had the best outcome for a stroke. I recovered almost fully back to 100% (I'm about 2% less sure footed than I used to be, but it's rarely noticeable), my face still feels a little weird but has markedly improved so I live in hope it will eventually get back to normal. It massively sucked. But strokes can fuck you up for life and I came out a weird medical story to tell and have to take some extra medication now/precautions to take (i cannot do certain types of yoga, no weightlifting, no push ups, no going on rollercoasters.... things that could strain my neck essentially) but overall I escaped very lucky.
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