Shitpost Central

I hate my life.

[prescioussoles-deactivated20181]

[plutonium2003-blog]

i don’t know why i reblogged this but either way it’s hot, unlike me.

[plutonium2003-blog]

A dream I had

The entire Sausage Party movie but every curse word every episode of Drawn Together plays but every frame with Captain Hero the entire Bee Movie plays but every bee the Nutshack theme plays but every nutshack We Are Number One plays but every one all of Leafy’s videos play but every “Keemstar” “literally” or reference to suicide Biggie Cheese sings Mr. Boombastic but every rhyming word (this includes “boombastic”) the nations of the world song from Animaniacs plays but every nation starting with a vowel (i.e. Albania, Ethiopia) a let’s play of the FNAF 4/20 mode plays but every jumpscare every episode of SpongeBob plays but every time they say a character’s name Mr. Enter’s Newborn Cuties review plays but every curse word, yell, or cut to raw footage it cuts back to Sausage Party.

If you want it to be quicker, instead play the red band Sausage Party trailer instead of the full movie, play the season 1 DT episodes instead of all of them play the Bee Movie trailer instead of the full movie, play all of Leafy’s golden age (January-May 2016) videos instead of every single one of them, just use season 4 episodes of SpongeBob instead of the full series, and instead cut back to Sausage Party every time a SpongeBob character’s name is said instead of cutting to Mr. Enter.

[plutonium2003-blog]

it’s

the

[plutonium2003-blog]

Happy New Years, niggas! We personally had a good year. We had some good laughs, we did things somewhat productive, and, of course, this year is when all of us met. Except for Wily and Michael, they knew each other since they were babies. We’re looking forward to a good 2017, as that’s when everything about us will change. Hopefully we’ll have more wild sex parties, this time, with Almazbek.

[plutonium2003-blog]

i

ain’t the sharpest

[plutonium2003-blog]

the

world is

[plutonium2003-blog]

some

body once

[plutonium2003-blog]

minecraft is the first game ever your jst a jelous hater who only plays call of duty you dont no what real video games are all you play is call of duty you jelous hater call of duty ripped off minecraft because call of duty is just like you a jelous hater do call of dety riped oof minecraft like how you riped of myshaft your a hater and call of duty is a hater i love haters tho i hav a thousand gay hats that say i heart my haters on them but i dont like you tho you ripped off minecraft the first game in the world how dould u do such a thing your gust as bad as call of duty i hate call of duty because call of duty ripd of minespace u probaly play call of duty so much that you rip off minecraft to minecraft is the beset game ever what is wrong with you

[staggot]

honestly she is serving looks

[rippingupthedisco]

we seriously are not giving this enough attention like you just cannot take the Chanel Hysteria lipstick, the 100% authentic Tiffany & Co.™ pearl necklace WITH the matching set of earrings. got the 2016 Fall/Winter blood orange Yves Saint Laurent fitted evening gown. and the hair is laid. to. rest. finally you see that drink? thats most definitely a large and you know she got this all with her own munty h u n t y

[krabby-kronicle]

YAASSS GIRL

[plutonium2003-blog]

Please note that the email address is not the one for the G+ profile that fully runs it. The email address belongs to the G+/YouTube account “The Dork Knight,” while the profile that this should be associated with is named “Gehen ficken sich.” You can use any of the two profiles to contact us through YouTube or Google+, but “Gehen ficken sich” is recommended, as it’s more active that The Dork Knight. The reason for this is because “Gehen ficken sich” is associated through email with another tumblr that we will only mention as cringe comparisons. To avoid confusion, the only reason we answer emails to The Dork Knight is because it’s just easier.

[plutonium2003-blog]

NEW RULE

I forgot to mention this the rules, but sinposting, the act of using (often sexual) religious disobedience stories to derail intelligent conversation, is allowed. Hopefully it recreates threadjacking and dearest friend Michael can be credited to forcing a meme.

[plutonium2003-blog]

MODS AND RULES

Rule Mod Wily: Head honcho, rules the group like the Uruguayan government. Gets to enforce all rules except the Almazbek rule. 

Mod Michael: The hatred monitor, very similar to Spanky from Drawn Together. He patrols the comments, exterminating hate and bad shitposting.

Mod Sabina: Arabic faggot, she enforces the “no SJWs” rule and also secretly launches attacks on cringe and special snowflake tumblrs.

Mod Grace: Asian goddess, fixes technical problems like glitches and DDoSes. Do not disrespect the person who keeps this community alive.

Mod Almazbek: This account’s shitty ripoff of Mod Silver, hopefully he doesn’t get kicked.

Rules:

Rule Blue: Never dox people, or else Grace will put chopsticks into your urethra/pussyhole.

Rule Yellow: Shitpost and art submissions are to be open at all times.

Rule White: Never attack someone for race, orientation, gender, etc., or else Michael will shove his black dick into your anus. Slurs are allowed, however.

Rule Green: If an offensive comment is seen, please notify us at Shitpost Central’s email, [email protected].

Rule Red: Botposting, libertarianism, and Mauritanians are not allowed here. And while we’re on the subject, no bleach-kill yourself crap.

Rule Orange: If you’re an SJW or special snowflake, then Sabina will sneak into your account and 9/11 it.

Rule Purple: Be nice to Almazbek. This is the only rule Wily doesn’t enforce, and it’s also the only rule Almazbek gets to enforce.

Thanks for choosing Shitpost Central, have fun.

[plutonium2003-blog]

Hwat the hell did you just freaking say about me, you little bobby? I'll have you know I graduated at the top of my class in the sales of propane and propane acessories, and I've been involved in numerous secret propane raids on Thatherton Fuels, and I have over 300 confirmed sales. I am trained in grilla warfare and I'm the top salesman in the entire Strickland Propane company. I will wipe you the hell out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in arlen, mark my god danged words. You think you can get away with saying that crap to me over the phone? Think again, boy. As we speak I am contacting my group of redneck friends across the street and your number is being traced right now so you better prepare for hell, hippie. The hell that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your charcoal grill. You're freaking dead, boy. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can sell to you in over 700 different ways. and thats just with my grill catalog. Not only am I extensively trained in the sales of propane and propane acessories, but I have access to the entire propane and grill stock of Strickland Propane and I will use it to its full extent to sell you a grill thats off the face of the great USA, you little democrat. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little "clever" charcoal grill was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your freaking money. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price you god danged idiot. I will spill propane all over you and you will drown in it. You're freaking buying, customer.

[plutonium2003-blog]

I'll have two number 9's, a number 9 large, a number 6 with extra dip, a number 7, two number 45's, one with cheese, and a large soda.

[plutonium2003-blog]

y tho

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