#1 dwarf planet this side of the kuiper belt

occasional funnyperson, name-haver of ceres or luna, consumer of media, user of she/her pronouns, user of a banner from raindancer protocol, owner of https://plutooonium.neocities.org/, one or two other things

[plutooonium]

“i collect coins” isn’t that called saving

[agnes-nielsens]

[agnes-nielsens]

[mariaangels]

Bárbara Bezina

[stephdudette]

So idk if you guys know of a game called Undertale. Its by Toby Radiation Fox, the guy who does homestuck music.

Well i started playing the demo, and that part with the flower, I thought it was gonna be all cute and nice.

BOY WAS I HELL WRONG. THAT FLOWER FREAKED THE HELL OUT OF ME. IM STILL SHAKING NOW.

someone calm me down. im not even 10 seconds and this is freaky. its like OFF  but idk. sdjgklsdjg;lksdjg

imma keep playing though, hopefully it gets better

[apjvff]

Remember the Golden Rule: Treat others the way you want to treat them.

[bunnygirljesus]

Black nerds just wanna enjoy their hobbies without dealing with fuckers general antiblack behavior or just straight up being racist towards us for existing and minding our own business.that is literally it.

No black fan deserves to deal with fandoms and creators racist bs or to be painted as "toxic aggressive bullies" when they rightful criticize or get mad and disappointed bc of said creator antiblackness, YES even if it was an old incident or if it as "small" it don't matter it still racism and it deserves to get called out and criticized all the same

[theradioghost]

an incomplete list of iconique Sam Vimes Moments™:

arresting a dragon

running through the streets of ankh-morpork naked

running through the woods of uberwald naked and fighting off werewolves with his bare fucking hands

telling the ancient personification of darkness and vengeance to fuck off

“Well, Reg, tomorrow the sun will come up again, and I’m pretty sure that whatever happens we won’t have found Freedom, and there won’t be a whole lot of Justice, and I’m damn sure we won’t have found Truth. But it’s just possible that I might get a hard-boiled egg.”

arresting an entire war

the ginger beer trick

reluctantly acquiring yet more titles, being embarassed

responds to being told the watch can’t interfere with the aforementioned war by handing in his badge and raising a militia

just no fucking clue how boats work

That! Is!! Not!!! My!!!! Cow!!!!!

giving up all hope of returning to a future with his wife and child to stay in the past and fight in a revolution he knows he can’t win because failing to try to help people is utterly antithetical to the fundamental state of being Sam Vimes

“when the shouting started she knew Sam was alive and well, because only Sam made people that angry”

if anyone’s setting fire to this city it’s going to be me (ankh-morpork has burned down at least twice already at this point)

arresting fucking Havelock Vetinari

“I’ll teach him to walk! I’m good at teaching people to walk!”

getting annoyed at the idea that the assassins are no longer willing to accept any amount of money to kill him

defusing a riot with a cigar and a mug of cocoa

throwing fucking Havelock Vetinari over his shoulder

all of the international incidents because he’s fundamentally incapable of not being salty to The Man

despite being The Man

telling Vetinari to shut up

Vetinari shutting up when Vimes told him to

stopping all of ankh-morpork’s traffic because reading to his son before bed is infinitely more important

getting obscenely rich, hating all of it except the bubble baths

“Who are you, pray?” “The law, you sons of bitches!”

“How dare you? How dare you! At this time! In this place! They did the job they didn’t have to do, and they died doing it, and you can’t give them anything. Do you understand?”

arresting himself

every single fucking noir and western and cop movie one-liner

having so many near-death experiences that Death calls them “near-Vimes experiences” and brings a book along

fistfight on a ship being hit by a river tidal wave in the middle of a storm

“a watchman is a civilian you inbred streak of piss”

gleefully pointing out to the assassins that he does in fact technically own the place

ordering rebels to take down their barricades and rebuild them properly

[sillyjimjam]

“on whose authority?” “Mr Burleigh and Mr Stronginthearm” (five years too early)

the sam vimes “boots” theory of economic unfairness

fisticuffs on the ROOF of a SPEEDING TRAIN

SHIRTLESS

he TORE HIS SHIRT OFF

TO FIGHT DWARFS

on the ROOF of a SPEEDING TRAIN

having the entirety of the police force across the world named after him - “sammies”

having a tiny policeman inside his own head because he doesn’t trust himself

eXTREMELY PROTECTIVE OF HIS WATCH FAMILY

knowing beforehand what the treacle mine road lads were going to do to him and turning it back on them by stealing the inkwell back - and making them all wonder who he’d frame for it

“it’s a half brick in a sack, sarge” “i’m saving up for a house”

constantly striving against his own ingrained prejudices!! even when he really struggles, he tries to always be inclusive!! 

raised on the Mean Streets but secretly Soft

loves! cushions! the more pillows the better!

every time his alcoholism is addressed

literally becomes his own mentor

can’t do anything without being extra as fuck

is most hated and feared by his enemies for being - not a lord, not a copper - but a blackboard monitor

[charl0ttan]

fmk air water food

fuck food marry air kill food fuck water

[sylph-of-gender]

that's not how this works. that's not how this works at all.

[charl0ttan]

awww wehwehwehweh weh googajjagaff mm goodagaba mazoozoo

[plutooonium]

patrick schneeweis if he was born a couple decades later: vampirism is for larpers in junior high

[ot3]

i think out of disrespect we should just start using "spamtenna moment" as shorthand for when a nothing tier yaoi ships between side characters somehow manages to eclipse in fandom popularity all of the central character relations of both the main cast and the rest of the side characters that aren't men. i think this should become such a widespread and entrenched form of fandom lingo for insulting ships that the next generation of teens will grow up understanding its meaning and not its origins in the same way teens of my generation used adjective!character parlance long before ever learning what bang paths were.

[plutooonium]

i really need to sit down and learn vim because i just know writing code in nano is slowing me down a lot

[lunaeregia]

[paulandersonxo]

jirachi cookies with white chocolate ganache and a salted caramel centre (plus roasted hazelnuts in the shiny ones)

[liquidcrystalsky]

two mouse cursors one desktop using Weston compositor, found out this was possible on this fedi thread

[plutooonium]

laptop was doing this thing for a bit where it would occasionally freeze and/or the screen would go black for a few seconds before waking up again and it stopped doing that eventually without me trying to fix anything. my tried-and-true method of "just live with it until it works itself out" wins again

[plutooonium]

"none of our actions mean anything because we're all gonna die anyway" is OUT. "everything we do means all the more because, if we're all gonna die, that means we only have so many things we can do and we'd best make the most of all of them" is IN

[lascitasdelashoras]

Marcel Duchamp for MINOTAURE N° 6