
Discoholic 🪩

PR's Tumblrdome
Game of Thrones Daily

bliss lane
Cosmic Funnies

pixel skylines
𓃗
Misplaced Lens Cap
KIROKAZE

No title available
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

tannertan36

Product Placement

Origami Around
The Stonewall Inn
Sweet Seals For You, Always
taylor price
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
hello vonnie

gracie abrams
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Bulgaria
seen from China

seen from Türkiye
seen from Bangladesh

seen from United States
seen from U.S. Virgin Islands
seen from Latvia
seen from Türkiye
seen from Jordan
@porij
you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for a nuanced reason
my cherios spelled out my exact address this morning but like what the gudge ever i gobbled those honey nut freaks up and licked the bowl too
someone contact my fucking lawyers
So I had a hysterectomy today (hooray!) and I brought along my stuffed orca, Shamu, as a comfort object. And everyone i interacted with during my pre-op was like "Oh! Who's this?" so I was telling them all about him, how he's been with me since I was 9 and gone on every single vacation and road trip, and they were telling me about their own stuffed buddies (one lady said she still has hers after 40 years!) and all of this while I was signing consent forms and providing a list of the things I'd brought with me, you know, small talk.
So then a nurse comes over and goes "Okay, I've got some stickers I'll put on your things so we know they're yours" and I'm like "OK cool" so she puts a sticker on my coat and stickers on my bags of clothes and then she turns to Shamu and I'm like "oh I guess he gets a sticker too"
But no. She pulls out a hospital bracelet that's an exact copy of mine and slaps it on his tail, like so:
And i was delighted by this, so I took a picture to send to my friends, who were equally delighted, and were cracking me up with their reactions (like so:)
Anyway, they take me back and put me under, and when I awake groggily a few hours later it takes me a minute to get my bearings, so I don't notice Shamu at first. But then I realize he's tucked up next to me in the gurney, so I grab him, and my hand touches gauze.
And I'm like "huh?" so I look at him and I realize
They gave my fucking orca a hysterectomy
[steals your baby immediately after his birth][raises him][trains him in the ways of an ancient martial art invented by cormorant fishers in 700 ad for 13 years][enters him in a tournament][he loses in 4 rounds] ok whatever. you can have him back
*street shot of zohran mamdani clad in nasty lil suit and hard hat* five months ago i was elected mayor of new york city. in that time, we have managed to COMPLETELY defeat the Staten Island Minotaur at no additional cost to the new york taxpayer
I love when desire leads to disappointment. It’s a classic
sorry man, i just looked that movie up on doestheantdie.com and...let's just watch something else, ok?
wait i just found out you can be nice to people and be their friend i thought we had to kill them all cause i was raised in a lab to be a living weapon
randomly remembered this tweet and had to stop myself from bursting out laughing
honestly one of the all time tweets of all time tbh
have you noticed that everything depends on various factors
we've received reports of gagobears off the ageric sea
Wait lowkey I’m goated