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will byers stan first human second
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@praoubl
Intro
Hello, I'm praoubl aka voidstar of the gray system.
pronouns: it/they/star/bit/fox
neurotype: autistic
gender: no
orientation: aroace
kintypes: fox, robot, cloudcat, and black hole
interests: math, science, philosophy, anarchism, identity, geology, space, mechanical engineering, modded minecraft, classpects, undertale, deltarune, paranatural
I am on my paws and knees begging folks to realize they don't have to be the world's most amazing writer ever to write! The alterhuman tags have been feeling really devoid and empty of a lot of the usual interesting essays lately and that makes me really sad! I love it when you all write! I love reading about the experiences of people! You also don't have to be interesting to write about yourself. Most people, I find, view themselves to be quite boring and are more fascinated with the lives of others. The reality of this is that you think you're boring because you've lived with yourself/selves your entire life! Of course you're going to seem mundane to yourself. But the secret is, nobody else is you. And no matter how utterly boring you find yourself or your thoughts or your particular relation to the alterhuman community I can assure you, you are interesting to others out there. Your voice DOES matter. Your thoughts and experiences DO have value. You ARE valuable. So please, please write. Please draw. Please share your experiences through literally whatever form you possibly can! I LOVE to read about everyone's unique experiences. Some of my favourite essays and writings out there have been from people who are so entirely and vastly different from myself that I could never have even conceived of the way they viewed things and how they experienced the world around them until I read about their experiences. Some of my favourite artworks are from people who's styles and preferences are wholly different from my own. I promise you, you do not have to be talented or skilled or amazing or perfect to create something of meaning and worth that revolves around your experience. Whether that be a handful of sentences attempting to verbalize a way you felt during a shift, or a several thousand word essay on your particular experience as a spiritual therian. Whether that be a simple pen scribble or a 16+ hour finished piece of work. Whatever it may be. It has meaning because you made it with your own digits with your own hands with your own claws and its yours. Please write.
What do you do once the Hype is over?
Something that is a constant point of talk in the Alterhuman community is "Where are the Elders at?" "Why don't Elders post as much anymore?"
And as someone who's been in the community for over 10 years now, I distinctly remember thinking "Hah, that'll never be me. I love posting about my alterhumanity" But low and behold, I've kinda fallen off from posting daily. Heck its a miracle if I make a post once a month! Sure I lurk around the tags and forums. I'm active in the comments at least. But I've definitely noticed my presence in the community falling to the back burner.
So I'm calling all "Elders" and "Greymuzzles"
Go ahead and pick a couple of questions from the following and answer them (or answer them all, I'm not a cop) vvvvvv
What are some ways that you still struggle with Alterhumanity?
What are some Alterhuman Success stories you have? (Whether it be finding a neat hack for dealing with species dysphoria or a fun affirming encounter you had such as coming out to a friend)
What are some lessons that you've learned after all these years?
What are some writings that you've done that you think are still relevant now? (feel free to link to them!)
What are some major differences in what the community was like when you discovered it vs how it is now?
How did you deal with the "Hype" of discovering your Alterhumanity wearing off?
What have you learned from the newest generation of Alterhumans? Feel free to tag people, respond directly to this post, or to make your own post!
Hello! Haven't been in the actual online community very long but I've been aware of and actively engaging with my alterhumanity for 10 years at this point. To answer some questions!
1. I still struggle a lot with my alterhumanity namely in that I feel like I'm acting too human a lot of times! While I believe myself to be nonhuman down to a physical level, the fact that I still have to walk around mimicking a human routine and doing human actions can be pretty distressing. I catch myself feeling and thinking "I'm not even a human I shouldn't have to do this I could just run away right now." quite often, but less so than I did when I was in my teens. Especially early teens.
There is also an ever present worry that I've made it all up even though I've been reminded again and again by everything about my life that I absolutely am not. I don't know if it will go away, but it's gotten much easier to ignore.
2. This is more of an Adult Money Can Be Used For Goods And Services type deal but I got a human sized dog bed and set myself up a den with a nest inside of it beneath my bed so that I have a comfortable, dark, and cozy place to relax and hide away when I'm feeling stressed out and unable to function around others. My roommate very much so understands as he is a dog in some way, and so he's very supportive overall of my lack of human behavior and need for space.
3. Don't worry about it. It's very basic advice but it's the one I stick to the most closely. Constant worry and examination of your own identity will only lead to more doubt and distress in the long run. While I do participate in a bit of discourse from time to time and generally encourage people to use the correct definitions and terminology, I am not the identity and microlabel police. If that's what works for you, good on you, but please don't feel pressured to attempt to label and explain away every aspect of your identity. Also, Write. Please write. I already have a whole post detailing this but please write about your experiences. We lose out on hearing the voices of our whole community if they refuse to speak.
4. My neocities holds all my essays I think are relevant and some that are outdated but I keep up for posterity and archival reasons. I actively encourage anyone who may read this to keep a Neocities, Dreamwidth, Strawpage, Carrd.co, etc. About themselves.
5. In a way I feel the community now is both more open and less policed/harshly restrictive towards new members. I remember the 2000-2010s Period in which every new member was holding up Thorn of Therian Territory as their primary source of advice and the older community had reactively closed off in response to the very unflattering and rude portrayal of Naia Ōkami in the documentary she featured in as well as the rise of "therian" documentaries that depicted our community as being weird and cringe which in turn encouraged folks on tumblr to begin making otherkin and therian cringe posts. (Take this with a grain of salt. I was born in the early 2000s. I mostly experienced the 2010s aspect of this which had a huge uptick in bullying over youtube.)
We were policing the community out of a need to protect our own. And while there is certainly less now, I think we may fall back into a level of gatekeeping with the uptick of bullying on tiktok and us being present in the news now. I don't think we'll ever be allowed the same level of privacy and secrecy that we once had again, but I fear we may repeat ourselves out of perceived necessity.
I enjoy, genuinely, how open this community is. But between the misuse of terminology that's been around for ages, the attempted re-coining of some terms by certain individuals or the coining of new terms for experiences we already have words for (ie. The whole "Faunaluna" situation that went down on Tiktok late last year/earlier this year.) or the rise in folks claiming others are "larping" their alterhumanity, I think we may backslide into restrictive attitudes again if we cannot handle these with grace.
6. All that was exciting will eventually become mundane. I did feel disappointment and disconnect after the "wow" of discovering my alterhumanity wore off, but through keeping up with myself(selves) and engaging with my nonhumanity in little ways each day I've been able to keep that connection. Through how I dress, speak, act, eat, make art, etc. This is how I stay connected.
I also remind myself (and others) that it is well ant truly ok to feel disconnected some days. It will happen. Be gentle and kind to yourself.
7. I think from our newest generation I've rediscovered a bit of the spark I used to have back around when I was a similar age. Which again, not very long ago, but so much has changed. The emphasis on gear and masks and quads especially, and I do love the crafty part of our community.
My biggest takeaway really has been freedom of self expression. I think the newest generation of alterhumans is spectacular at being individuals and displaying that through everything they do and every space they occupy. And I really do think we can take their propensity towards individuality and adopt it for ourselves.
If you've never seen someone write about their experiences with a species or character or entity or object or concept that you identify as, or if you've never found traces of other people who have identified as the specific nonhuman or fictional thing that you identify as, consider this a sign for you to write about your experiences!
Leave tracks! Show that you were here! Share what you experience and how you feel and understand it! If not for your own future benefit, then for the benefit of those who come after and wonder if someone like you existed!
Transfemmasc and transmascfem alterhumans, you're great. Your identities are amazing and unique and valid. Don't change yourself for the sake of others. You're great as you are.
What kinds of posts trigger moral & checking OCD (and psychosis)?
[PT: What kinds of posts trigger moral & checking OCD (and psychosis)? /End PT]
So many people write and reblog posts that have very direct triggers towards folks with moral & checking OCD. Here are posts NOT to make/reblog.
To get the terminology out of the way - moral OCD is a condition in which a person becomes obsessed about doing something "morally wrong", and develops compulsive behaviors over it. Checking OCD is a condition in which a person becomes obsessed over checking over their own (or others) actions, as to avoid a perceived disaster, and develops compulsions around it.
Do NOT make/reblog posts with phrases such as:
"Reblog/donate/share or else you are letting me/someone I know die/suffer." "Reblog or else you're [insert bad thing]"/"Reblog if you're not [insert bad thing]"
^If it is an urgent donation post that you feel deserves to be shared, at the very least, add "tw reblog bait" and "tw OCD trigger."
"Reblog/like/comment/share or else [insert creature] will find you/stalk you/come into your house/etc" "[Insert thing] is coming to your location. You cannot stop it. It will be outside your window soon"/"[Insert thing] is in your walls."
^These ones can also trigger hallucinations, delusions, and paranoia in people with schizospec disorders/psychosis! It may seem like a "haha funny meme" to you, but to people with OCD or psychosis, they could fret heavily over this, and wonder if they are going to be in danger if they don't reblog/like/comment/share.
"It is illegal to be/have [insert thing here]." (Example: "It is illegal to be nonqueer during pride month", "it is illegal to have internalized ableism during disability pride month", etc.)
^Once again, this may seem like a funny meme to you, but instead, it just tells people with moral OCD that their existence is wrong, or that their intrusive thoughts are a crime (thought crimes are not real!)
my firsts post... this is some of the methods my system uses to tell me they're real. we've mulled it over and felt like sharing it because the community on tumblr has helped us a lot with understanding and accepting things. <3
you deserve a life you aren’t constantly recovering from
reblog if you're ok with your singlet friends asking you questions about plurality and/or your system
If anyone says you can’t be a system in any way, don’t listen to them. There is no wrong way to be a system. If you feel and/or identify as plural, then you are plural. There is no limit to alters. There is not a required amount. You do not have to be 100% plural or 100% singlet with no in between, there are a lot of in betweens. You can present yourself however you wish. You can be as open or close about your plurality as you wish. You can have any sort of headspace, or no headspace. You can have lots of roles, a few roles, or no roles. You can have all introjects, or all brainmades, or anything else.
The function of your system cannot be determined by others. They are not you. You know how you work. In a time with a lot of negativity and hatred and policing, be proud of who you are and be as loud as you can, or let others be loud for you if you cannot be. We are all allowed to exist as we are.
alternate narrative: it’s actually fine if someone found me a little weird or even off-putting. i am a little weird and it’s no big deal
@unofficial-autism-post
Me: "Damn people are REALLY BAD at knowing when to tag their eyestrain art/images...either that or they just don't care about photosenitive epileptic people like me. I feel really sad now." Person: "But Allison, what if they just don't know or understand what qualifies as eyestrain and what doesn't?" Me: "You know what? That could be a factor...While it is always better to be safe rather than sorry (so YES people should always tag eyestrain even if they're unsure if it "counts" or not) maybe you've got a point?"
Anyways! HERE'S YOUR HANDY GUIDE TO WHAT CAN COUNT AS EYESTRAIN! I'm pulling this straight from the Artfight rules page about what needs to be labeled and filtered as eyestrain because it's VERY helpful and VERY accurate! I also know not everybody has an AF account and might not always have access to this handy guide, and this is an important resource; That's why I'm sharing it here! (under the cut)
PLEASE TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY!!! THIS IS ABOUT THE HEALTH AND SAFETY OF OTHERS!!!
You all need to understand that autonomy and especially bodily autonomy NEEDS to include being allowed to do things that are bad for you. True bodily autonomy includes being allowed to do things that are risky, drugs, cosmetic procedures and the like. Bodily autonomy needs to include being allowed to get high or smoke or get a BBL. The important part is education about the risks
The reason why so many of y'all's feminism sucks is because you still believe deep down in your hearts that there are only two kinds of people in the world: precious, ethereal, fragile dollthings called "women", and violent, lustful, rage-fueled apes called "men". Until you throw that idea away, 3rd-grade-tier "girls rule boys drool, girls are princesses and boys are stinky :(" is as feminist as we'll ever get-- and I hope it's obvious that that's lightyears away from the bare minimum of where we need to be.
I need mentally ill trans girls out there to know they're loved, I need physically disabled trans girls out there to know they're loved. I know every day can feel like you're a burden and terrible, but you're loved and wanted, you are not a burden and even if you were we want to carry that burden.
Genuine question what use do bedbugs in particular serve to the general ecosystem? I cant think of anything that eats them. (They're the only thing i want fully eradicated but if they help literally anything aside from terrorizing people I'd probably change my mind. Like how lots of things eat ticks and mosquitos pollinate)
Spiders, roaches, and centipedes as well as several other insect species feed on them frequently. Virtually all parasitic creatures are means of distributing nutrients, even if by a small margin.
Frankly, you really need to kill this idea that a living creature needs to serve a purpose to you to have the right to exist. If an organism's purpose is merely to survive (which is almost never true) that should be enough. This flagrant human-centric view on life needs to be stomped out. You have a right to rid your home of infestations, but deeming any creature deserving of eradication entirely is selfish and extremist beyond belief
