\(-.•)z

I'm not great at the advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?

[thebootydiaries]

not 2 be ungrapefruit but……why i look like that……

[ammit420]

in order to lead a happy life im gonna have to disappoint my parents a bit

[untexting]

Michelle Obama, eloquent as alway!

[meme4u]

[superbatmance]

[impulsivegiraffe]

i want to play this game

[tallestsilver]

I would gain so much weight playing this game and I wouldn’t even care

[kargrub]

IVE FUCKING PLAYED THIS GAME AND LET ME TELL YOU WHAT

SO ME AND THREE OTHER FRIENDS PLAYED IT THINKING THAT OH HEY ITS JUST GONNA BE A WHOLE PEPPER INSIDE AND WE WOULDNT ACTUALLY HAVE TO EAT IT

BUT NOOOOOOOOHOHOHO HELL THEY TOOK PEPPERS THE SAME HOTNESS OF SATANS ASSCRACK AND INTEGRATED THEM INTO THE CHOCOLATE ITSELF LIKE SOME EVIL CONCOCTION OF FLAVORS AND MADE IT INTO THE DREADED BULLET YOU DONT WANT TO GET

THE PERSON WHO GOT IT WAS IN TEARS OVER THE HEAT WITHIN SECONDS AND HAD ONLY EATEN THE VERY TINY TIP OF IT

SO WHAT DO THE REST OF US DO, AS THE (QUESTIONABLY) SANE HUMANS WE ARE?

WE TRIED IT AS WELL

SO HERE WE HAVE A CAR FULL OF CRYING, PANTING TEENAGERS AND ONE DAD IN A CONFUSED PANIC, SO HE BROUGHT US ALL TO BEN AND JERRY’S AND WE ALL STUMBLE IN LIKE “GIVE US ICE CREAM NOW” AND THE PEOPLE AT THE COUNTER WERE SCARED AND CONFUSED TRYING TO ASK WHAT FUCKING FLAVOR WE WANTED AND THE DAD WAS SITTING THERE TRYING TO GET AN ANSWER AND SOME RANDOM KID WAS CRYING BECAUSE OF US AND IT WAS GENERALLY JUST A VERY SHITTY SITUATION

SO WE GOT OUR ICE CREAM AND FINALLY CALMED DOWN AFTER A WHILE ENOUGH TO TALK LIKE NORMAL HUMAN BEINGS

AND THEN WE MADE THE DAD TRY IT WHICH WAS A VERY FUCKING BAD IDEA AS HE WAS BROUGHT TO THE SAME STATE AND HAD TO GET ICE CREAM AS WELL

SO ALL IN ALL DONT PLAY THIS GAME UNLESS YOU EAT HOT THINGS LIKE MOTHERFUCKING CANDY OR YOU’LL REGRET IT

the rest of the bullets tasted quite swell and we enjoyed them later once our taste buds started working again bUT DONT PLAY THIS GAME OR AT LEAST DONT FUCKING TRY IT ONCE SOMEONE ELSE GETS THE DEATH BULLET

[jadeitemaster-deactivated201612]

Fire can not kill a dragon

[fuks]

He fell down the stairs from excitement

[averagefairy]

cool girls are everywhere but its such a challenge to find one guy thats like mildly interesting to talk to……. it’s like they all have the personality of an actual adidas sandal

[rudiecantfailtomakeyoucum-deact]

Maybe you’re a bitch

[averagefairy]

i mean i definitely am but youre still boring

[acridthoughts]

[4a0000-deactivated20170115]

Who wants to love me back

[cantdisguise]

[herdreadsrock-deactivated202401]

Reblog. This could really help someone out.

[briswayze]

Reblogging because I remember the days I had to do this so my baby girl could eat

[carry-on-my-wayward-butt]

[v-a-l-e-p-h-a-r-deactivated2022]

…

[heavenknowsffs]

oh boy do i got some news for ya

[specta-a-deactivated20180419]

[hanukkahlewinsky]

parents: “let’s talk about your future" 

[guy]

i’m actually pretty cool just give me like 5 tries to get it right

[best-of-memes]

What they don’t show you in ‘The Incredibles’

[but-deans-back-tho]

It’s slightly less horrifying when you remember that she’s Elastigirl so her body is allowed to stretch like that. 

[delusion-of-negation]

The comment that saved the comic

[donidarkowitz]

If this was any other candidate this would be on every news outlet. It would be a scandal, and that person wouldn’t be candidate for long. The fact that he’s still the presumptive nominee is fucking RIDICULOUS.

[donidarkowitz]

Here are the articles on it 

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/rape-lawsuit-donald-trump-resurfaces-new-york-court-article-1.2681196

http://jezebel.com/heres-how-that-wild-lawsuit-accusing-trump-of-raping-a-1782447083

http://www.morningnewsusa.com/donald-trump-rape-jane-doe-real-identity-revealed-2385315.html

https://www.rt.com/usa/347804-trump-accused-rape-epstein/

http://gothamist.com/2016/06/20/trump_rape_lawsuit.php

http://heavy.com/news/2016/04/donald-trump-jeffrey-epstein-katie-johnson-lawsuit-accused-rape-teen-girl-sex-slave-documents-pdf/

http://www.nationalreview.com/corner/436890/did-donald-trump-and-jeffrey-epstein-rape-13-year-old-girl

[uglyassprettyboy]

yo…..

[karpetshark]

i’m an angry person and i want to let it out and be an asshole but i’m also a nice person and i don’t want to actually hurt anyone’s feelings do u feel me

[uncletarby]

Holy hell do I feel you