𝑣𝑖𝑣𝑖

my friends say my wisdom needs to be public

[princess-with-a-disorder]

every time winter ends I convince myself I want summer and then it's august and I realize I just wanted spring with free time. and so the cycle continues, but I always end up finding the truth, which is that Autumn is Perfect.

[princess-with-a-disorder]

ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to work minimum wage, have a hate love relationship with my manager and end up with mysterious bruises and cuts

[princess-with-a-disorder]

i have this duck couple which always hangs out near my work, manager complained about them today and had to stop myself from telling her that peter and patricia are actually everything to me and my main source of serotonin and my reason to keep going and my idea of a perfect relationship

[princess-with-a-disorder]

noooooo diva don't kill yourself, the art of serving cunt has to be spread to prevent it from going extinct, don't die you have big responsibilities

[princess-with-a-disorder]

i don't compliment people very often because there are a lot of cool people and i would just have to compliment everyone i see all the time and that sounds scary

[princess-with-a-disorder]

me talking to any girl/gay barista:

yes iced coffee with vanilla syrup please (mentally: and can you also tell me who your hair dresser is and what you used as your reference photo and what makeup you use and how your eyeliner looks so perfect and where you got your shirt and why are u so cool and how does it feel to be you and to be able to operate such a sexy coffee machine and are you happy?) continues to smile awkwardly

[princess-with-a-disorder]

idk which older lady needs to hear this but that little blue line on your eye looks lovely and not unsettling in any way! you do you! gorgeous diva!!!

[princess-with-a-disorder]

had a work dinner and walked home after, my manager asked me if i got home safe, i said i got barked at but yeah

she says 'ah but barking dogs don't bite so you're lucky'

i had to clarify i got barked at by boys💀

[charl0ttan]

[princess-with-a-disorder]

'what happened to true romance' 'born in the wrong generation' 'men used to go to war'

actually true romance was never found in a different generation because it is not a man bringing you flowers and kissing your hand, and its also not found in ur fuckass colleen hoover book

true romance is found in ignoring eachother while in the same room but occasionally showing eachother ur animal crossing island. and also in pigeons. ur provider husband is not gonna safe u bcs he's not a pigeon and he can't bring u branches.

[princess-with-a-disorder]

receiving criticism when you have adhd is so funny its like 'ah yes the script™️.' legends say these ancient words were said before i was even born, the doctor saw me pop out of womb and said 'she tries hard but she lacks focus' and then the folk repeated it every few business days for the rest of my life but now they when the script™️ is repeated once more it's overexplained like im hearing it for the first time, ma'am i've seen this film before, im playing bingo in my head.

[princess-with-a-disorder]

i love when women gently criticize u and then say I Dont want to be Mean. like LADY, do you know how the people treat me? have u ever seen a middle aged man after HE messed up HIMself? u are an angel send from the heavens and U do Not upset me, god bless

[princess-with-a-disorder]

genuinely how do i interact with children??? im a cashier and a kid asked me whats that lolly and i said thats a lolly, like god help me was i supposed to do a little dance maybe?

[princess-with-a-disorder]

i cant imagine having a stressful day where everything is bad but then also having a stomach ache because u have a fear of pooping in public, could never be me!!

[princess-with-a-disorder]

genuinely get so sad when people doomscroll in my company, like i can give u brainrot too!! talk to me pls!! pls!! i can perform for u!! give me a chance!!

[martindykewood]

im barely exaggerating when i say i think of this every single day

[princess-with-a-disorder]

translated: i'm insanely happy that i wasn't born in germany bro i can't even speak german how would i survive

there's another one with 'im so happy i didnt have to build an underwater tunnel because i wouldnt know how to do that

[princess-with-a-disorder]

update: employment did not kill me, everyone is very nice to me even though i am stupid, i suggest we all get jobs it is safe i promise. i am saying this voluntary. get a job. now.