I'VE - RETURNED @printingerror - Tumblr Blog

i wanna see someone fight in media the way scythes are designed to be used.

AGGRESSIVE LAWNMOWER

So by now we all know that washing feet in the bible alludes to having sex, but does it mean to bottom or top? Cause technically, if it means to top then Jesus fucked the sin out of Judas, and if it means to bottom, then it implies that to be relieved of your sins, you need to give Jesus a good dickin' (or peggin if you're so inclined)

#important questions for the common queer #shitpost

thinkin bout how Christians be worshipping the image of Da Vinci's gay lover but are against homosexuality???

#the disrespect smh #cocks out for jesus #do you know how many homophobic dudes have told me that the only man they love is Jesus???#got some bad news for you bud

do I really NEED therapy?

#why not just die 🥴#I'm crazy? more like the PRICE FOR THERAPY IS CRAZY #my depression ain't shit compared to my bills🥴#also i know its not cool to describe people with mental illness as CRAZY #i have diagnosed depression oki? so its all poggers

wakes up an hour before my assigments due

points at the mirror.

laughs.

repeat.

#me: 🤡🤡🤡#i am my own worst enemy #i bully myself for that spicey personality

why is that when we gays (umbrella term) have a mental breakdown, it always comes back to white bread?

#its the wonder bread for me #its the cut crust for me #its the dino cutters for me #its the lack of seasoning yet flavourful taste for me #its the need for fluffiness for me #gay gay gay gay #gay #we gays #gay culture

I dreamt about buying white bread and felt joy.

MY LIFE IS IN SHAMBLES.

#my life is in shambles #white people culture is buying bread #im not white but that dream should technically be allowed to be exchanged for white privilege #white bread

OMG NEILLLLL CIcEREGAAAAAAAA

#lemon demon #omg neil cicerega #give me your fucking credit card information

fuck you, algorithm.

#i am not miserable #i am fine #fuck you dude #the skynet is getting a little too personal #i dont care if you want my personal data #just dont be a dick about it

Ooooooo I wanna gaslight Jeff Bezos so bad.

#call it a sexual kink if you must but i wanna make jeff bezos question his basic actions #further addition to my girlboss gatekeep gaslight series of thought #jeffybezos

Supernanny but instead of letting the parents stay together in a toxic relationship, the mom just divorces the dad and marries Supernanny Jo Frost.

#helpin the heteros one Supernanny at a time #shitpost #gay gay gay gay

becoming god is such girl boss energy.

#girlboss #shitpost #humor #blasphemy #jack chick #Wow Anything goes! I can lie cheat...Whats to keep me from becoming a god?

Quarantine be giving others a whole new skill or some good character development, meanwhile I've just grown more twisted :,) Enjoy the playlist I made.

#if i have to hear my neighbors fight i might as well make it fun #god i need to go outside and touch grass #but its funny

Somebody, THAT ISN'T MY THERAPIST, tell me why I'm sexually attracted to the concept of having a nemesis.

#shitpost #nemesiscore #GuessWhichAngstyJRPGVillianImTalkingAbout

I just want somebody to platonically stab me. IS THAT TO MUCH TO ASK FOR????

#friendshipgoals #shitpost #funwithfriends #ResponsibleKnifeOwner

printingerror

just woke myself by laughing. I had a dream in which a told a bunch of british people that the royal gamily has an allelle that makes them bald. I don't know why I found this funny, but I fully woke up chortling.

printingerror

Turns out that was a prophetic dream and the allele wasn't balding but RACISM

#royal family #shitpost

YALL, HERE ME OUT, THIS IS HOW PEOPLE COULDVE STOPPED THE OPIODS CRISIS

"Fellas is it kinda gay to use opiods?"

OPIOD CRISIS PREVENTED.

#fellas is it gay #shitpost

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I'VE - RETURNED