prnf

words, words, words

[imsobadatnicknames2]

Does anyone else get pissed off when you wake up just as you were making significant progress in some bullshit task you had to do in a dream? Like great now I did all that shit for nothing

[legallybrunettedotcom]

[inbabylontheywept]

Until death, all defeat is psychological.

[seat-safety-switch]

For most of your neighbours, "smoking crack behind the bowling alley" is all that they can aspire to. Not you, though. You're different. You're ready to take life by the reins and start a business. In only a short time, you'll be doing whatever the fuck you want on your own jet-powered hover-yacht. As long as you do exactly what I say, and pay me money every month for my new secrets to success book.

Our glorious culture was built on the dream that you can achieve success for yourself, even with what is clearly a thick, Jello-like layer of classist/sexist/racist/ableist/homophobic horseshit covering everything. Only our books can cut through all that disgusting pudding-esque substrate, and never not paying us money will help you become rich as we become rich.

Now, I know a lot of you commies out there don't believe that a single person can get a great idea, start a new business, and become turbo-rich. I'm here to tell you that it's absolutely possible, if your dad is turbo-rich. No dad, or just a poor one, which might as well be the same thing? Then you need my books.

Inside my books, we'll tell you the secrets to getting rich. Hard work, gumption, networking, and the precise movement pattern of the security guard for the bank near your house. It's not free for us to research this, you know, with high-powered night-vision binoculars and a team of potentially ex-con-but-who-wants-to-be-a-narc security experts.

Haters will say that information is valuable only for a short period of time, and that banks hardly keep any money at all in the vault. That's why you can't stop ordering our books. This here is a commitment. Can I get you to commit? Save me a seat on your jet-yacht, friend.

[quasi-normalcy]

Concept: You have magical powers, but all of your spells need to be cast in rhyme. If the metre is wrong, it won't work. If the rhyme almost rhymes but not quite, it won't work. You can reuse the same constructions and just substitute in new names as needed, but the more you do this, the less powerful it will be. Simple cantrips can be basic rhyming couplets, but the more complicated your spell, the more elaborate your poetical structure needs to be.

[quasi-normalcy]

Wizard duels, obviously, are just rap battles.

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

Parents trying to give their children magical immunity by giving them long names that don't rhyme with anything.

[literallymechanical]

This is not in any sort of principled stance or hot take or anything, because I honestly am baffled by my own reaction here! But when I heard that there was going to be a movie adaptation of the odyssey my entire reaction was just, "why?"

I read the Odyssey in high school and I liked it! But I feel absolutely zero emotions about seeing it on screen. Just a big "why would somebody take the time to do that?" Which is weird!! Because I have been excited for movie adaptations of books before! But not this one???

Somebody needs to help me process my feelings around this, I fired my therapist when he got a little too supportive of my ambitions

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

Your 8th grade English teacher didn't force you to watch the 1997 adaptation?

[gatheringbones]

tbh a lot of my advice boils down to “hey you know that terrible horrible looming thing you’re doing your best to avoid and distract and escape as much as possible but no matter what you do it just keeps looming and looming and ruining your life”

“just, fuckign, run straight at it screaming.”

[quasarkisses]

i needed this as a background

[spectrexviiii]

[thisisalovestry]

file -> phrases that are going to shift something in me forever

[insomniparty]

[thememedaddy]

[geniusoflove]

texting my coworker “hey! how are you feeling” and reading it 40 times to make sure i didn’t accidentally type how are you sex cum penis ass cum porn 1080p hot cock

[lovingjoana]

i actually can’t relate but LMAO this is hilarious

[geniusoflove]

thanks for laughing anyway

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

So people who use MS Teams are mostly doing so for work, right? How come every emoji is one I have to worry will get me sent to HR? I want to respond to a message from a co-worker, my options are heart, winky face, blushing face with hearts, kissy face, face with tongue sticking out, face with grabby hands, then if you scroll way down they're like okaaaaay here's a normal smiley.

[quasi-normalcy]

It's funny how these guys, who have been trumpeting how AI will reduce payroll and make everyone obsolete for years, are suddenly turning around and promising that "no, no, actually it will create jobs!" as it becomes clear that they're burning through public licence for the technology.

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

Jobs aren't going away - they're just getting shittier! Your new job is "checking" the AI that's doing your old job, which is harder but pays half as much.

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

Oh, or "going to jail if the AI model fucks up", I bet that's a real up-and-coming field.

[quasi-normalcy]

It's funny how these guys, who have been trumpeting how AI will reduce payroll and make everyone obsolete for years, are suddenly turning around and promising that "no, no, actually it will create jobs!" as it becomes clear that they're burning through public licence for the technology.

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

Jobs aren't going away - they're just getting shittier! Your new job is "checking" the AI that's doing your old job, which is harder but pays half as much.

[fandom-man]

[trochaic-mutant-ninja-tetrameter]

🎶Doesn't seem it's working! Undeterred geese!🎵

[soaringsearingphoenix]

well the geese can see the sign too

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

[singing-bowl]

thinking about how ursula k leguin said "what goes too long unchanged destroys itself. The forest is forever because it dies and dies and so lives" and how everyday i wake up slightly different and i can feel myself shed the skin of who i used to be slowly, slowly, until i look back and can scarcely recognise who i was... but also she is still a part of me, part of the leaf litter and the humus, supporting me as i send new roots down and new leaves stretching up to the sunlight

[tlirsgender]

"You know what's harder than Getting Better? Living Like That" is just the thesis for my whole shit going on right now honestly. You know what's harder than doing my physical therapy? Hurting All The Time. You know what's harder than addressing my gender dysphoria? Hurting All The Time

[tlirsgender]

I'm Doing The Hard Thing and it's *easier* than how I was living before. If you make yourself feel better you will have more energy to spend on Getting Better. Nice inch nails - the upward spiral. Crawl out of your grave Thursday

[seat-safety-switch]

Budgeting is really easy. You figure out how much money you need to spend in order to have a reasonable existence. Then, you realize you don't actually have that much money, so you go and buy little plastic model kits of robots instead. Throughout history, people have been attempting to cover this gap between weensie cartoon androids and functional adulthood with a tactical application of debt.

Debt's a simple concept. By getting what the experts are refusing to call un-money, you can cover these little holes in your spending habits. Of course, you can't do this for long, because eventually the lenders will break your knees if you can't pay them back. Unfortunately, it turns out "almost" breaking your knees over and over is very profitable. As a result, a lot of people are forced to get on the un-money treadmill, constantly being offered easy, live-saving debt that they then have to suffer greatly to sorta repay.

Thing is, collecting that debt is costly. People that borrow a bunch of money often don't have any money to pay you back. Chasing them into the courts can take a long time. Hired goons to break their knees? Never been more expensive. And if they simply move houses? That can become a big hassle tracking them down. So, often, lenders will simply sell the debt to some other sucker. Here, it's worth $1000, but you can give me $50 right now, and then you can collect it. A loss, certainly, but less than you'd spend on hired goons (which, you should recall, have never been more expensive.)

Well-intentioned folks have been setting up groups just to buy that debt and throw it out. It makes sense: if it's only $50 to get $1000 worth of debt, then spending $1000 will get you a whole lot of people off the hook. With that new beginning, folks who had a bad couple of months will get a chance to finally stop getting hounded, a bank somewhere loses some money, and everyone gets to feel good about themselves. That's why I've been doing my part, and taking out loans under fictitious names in order to buy little plastic model kits of robots. Screw you, banks! Just try to repossess my Ultra Honeybee Murder-Spree RX-77 Real Grade.

[bebsi-cola]

they really don't respect the time of disabled people. your application can take up to 12 weeks. the specialist waitlist is 3 years. your assessment will be any time within the next 6 months. let us know if you cannot attend this appointment you waited 7 weeks for and we'll reschedule next year. we've decided to assess you at this time and day and you have to be available or any support you dared to apply for is not going to happen. and in between these long bouts of waiting you have to survive the everyday

[elwoodallimann]

Explaining Artemis Fowl to someone is so unserious, like, what do you mean I'm supposed to stand here with a straight face while saying :

"Yes, yes the villain is 12. Yes he is also the protagonist. And a billionaire. He does have parents, yes. And a therapist. The fairy ? She's 70. Yes, yes he kidnapped her. And robbed half her people's money, thank you very much. She has a gun, yes. See that 16 y/o over there ? The one with glittery makeup ? She also has a gun. And that bald guy that's built like a fridge ? Thats her brother; he too has a gun, expect he doesn't need it. Yes, he's the villain's right hand. Please don't look in that direction, that's the Russian Mafia. The centaur ? He's a conspiracy theorist who's afraid of aliens."

[pseudo-random-neuron-firings]

I read it when I was 8, and thought "well, I'll probably be a billionaire by the time I'm 12, this checks out."