trying on a metaphor
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
dirt enthusiast
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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#extradirty
Mike Driver
KIROKAZE
祝日 / Permanent Vacation
taylor price
DEAR READER
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I'd rather be in outer space 🛸
Claire Keane
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sheepfilms
Sweet Seals For You, Always
$LAYYYTER
d e v o n
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@psychsmart
# psychsmart . is a highly privately independent rp blog for burton 'gus' guster from psych. this blog has a mature rating, is mutuals only, and is highly private.
exploring themes such as . . . friendship that changes you, self - preservation, being the mature idiot, trying to keep your 401k intact.
regular headaches : @psychnot .
ABBOTT ELEMENTARY Barbara Howard and Jacob Hill -> 4x13 Science Fair
@psychnot
@psychnot
repping my boy fr
radio show host gus my beloved idiot
starter call !
is he drunk? yes. is he embarrassed? absolutely not. whatever alcohol aliens drink, it's fucking fantastic. gus whoops as he slings an arm around @cr1chton's shoulders. " come on john, it'll be fun! " he's been trying to convince the other man to join him in karaoke for the past... hour, probably. " don't make me make chicken noises. " he'll do it too, he's had plenty of practice making them at shawn.
one of the moya crew hands him another drink, earning a high pitched cheer from him. " do it, do it or i'll never let you live it down. or are you scared i sing better than you? " words are slightly slurred, and he's only 43% sure he's pointing at john. it could also just be a john shaped pillar off to the side.
he's doubled over, hands on knees, panting. this is his worst nightmare, actually. it's like he's stuck on a treadmill and there's no way off, just more track to run in every direction. at least for now he's allowed a breather, straightening up to point an accusing finger at @timedten. " you could have told me there'd be running! i'm not in shape enough for this. "
he can excuse almost being murdered, that happens to him at least twice a month at this point, but exercise with no warning? absolutely not. at least with the sbpd he knows it's a risk. " do you even give your companions hazard pay? this feels like an osha violation. "
he's in full fanboy mode, grin wide, hands stimming in pure joy. " oh my god, you're ted lasso. dude, i love you. " it's then that he remembers to be cool, clearing his throat, holding out a hand for @belasso to shake.
" burton guster, your biggest fan. "
portrayal note: i write gus as a non-binary he/him lesbian btw.
" oh my god. oh my god, oh my god, what the fuck ? is that what i fucking think it is ? " / from psychsmart
❛ it's a two headed guzzark , gus , & yes , they can hear you. ❜ remind me why i was permanently sanctioned to babysitting duty ? wrangling a toddler was one thing , keeping shawn & gus in line was something else entirely. at least this particular offworld market was entertaining enough to keep them busy , though i'd already lost shawn in the crowd. hopefully mina had an eye on him , or maybe even a leash.
those leashed children in theme parks didn't really make sense to me until now. i threw the other human a glance , a small grin curling at the edges of my jaws. ❛ honestly , it's nice having you guys around , awkwardness with meens aside. i can't really remember the last time i spent time with another human without it being weird. you two just make it funny. ❜ taking gus by the shoulder , i steered him carefully away from the stall we were standing at , leaving the duel headed creature to peer after us as we continued to walk.
@psychsmart
" dude, it's an alien. a proper alien ! " mina doesn't count when she's on land in gus' book, and yes, he's said that exact sentence about 6 times today, but he keeps seeing proper aliens. " how are you so chill about this? this is amazing! " he allows john to lead him away, vaguely aware gawking might get him in trouble, which would probably not lead to an invite to hang out again. sure, the doctor will still be there, but those trips usually involve too many near death experiences for gus' comfort.
the reminder of the awkwardness between john and mina is minorly sobering. he remembers the loneliness she clearly felt when they first met, the way she had kept him and shawn at arms length. not entirely john's fault, obviously, but still, bros before pretty boy space vigilantes. " hey! we are serious and seasoned detectives! " he can't help the immediate defense, too used to years of everyone dismissing them as clowns, too childish to take seriously. " i bet you freaked out about aliens constantly at first, besides, travelling with the doctor usually means aliens trying to kill me, let me live a little. "
lips close around the straw of the drink in his hand, a pointed look on his face. " so, what did you even do before you ended up in space? were you like a secret agent? we might as well get to know each other better while mina and shawn are off making out or something equally disgusting. " the last part wasn't necessary, he knows, but he's got shawn's back, so he's practically contractually obligated to mention that those two can't keep their hands off of each other.
ROMAN ROY & SHIV ROY (and TOM WAMBSGANS) 1.02 — Sh*t Show at the F*ck Factory
@psychnot
starter call !
" shawn... why is there a dismembered furby on my desk? " / from psychsmart
❛ gus ! don't be the lesser half of a loaded burrito with no guacamole. i'm working on something big here , check this out. ❜ i leaned back on my heels , gesturing out my arms at the whiteboard set between the two of our desks. what appeared to be illegible scrawl & mishappen squares were etched across the surface , though with a trained eye , someone might've been able to riddle out the police file notes i'd side eyed on our way out of the station.
how was it my fault jules had the thing tucked under her arm , so i memorized it sideways ? i clicked my tongue , then gestured the purple marker toward the furby strewn across gus's desk. ❛ so ! body was dismembered , all limbs pulled off exactly at the sockets .. almost like it was pulled apart by some torture device , or .. oh my god. gus ! do you realize what this means ? this poor guy was pulled apart by horses. it's killer horses ! ❜ well , people who tied him to multiple horses , but still.
@psychsmart
he'd been planning on telling shawn he was like 60% sure he'd seen lassie on the verge of tears after turning on his car radio to be greeted with smashmouth, still. he still wanted to know how mina managed that. and now, instead, he's staring at a mock crime scene comprised of components from one of the most cursed toys known to man. just a day ending in a y then. he's seen weirder. " killer horses don't exist, shawn. if they did, i'd be living in a place where horses are illegal, you know they scare the crap out of me. "
he has to admit, as per usual, the attention to detail in the crime scene is meticulous. shawn is like that, he knows, gets lost in his own world of thoughts and some kind of mind palace that other people would kill for the keys too. all genius masked with humour and jokes. " have you got anything more for us to go on? i don't think the sbpd is gonna pay us for questioning horses. "
❛ are you wearing my shirt? ❜ / from psychsmart
❛ am i ? oh yeah , would you look at that. huh. ❜ my chin tipped to glance down at the front of my shirt , well , his shirt , wiping a finger pointedly across the new chocolate pudding stain etched along the fabric , popping the sugary goodness between my lips before throwing another quick glance back toward my friend , brows inched toward my hairline.
❛ i look good , right ? i got a date tonight. all my clothes were dirty , & i knew you'd have one that fit me , you beautiful , cocoa headed fashion savant ! ❜ i knew gus would hate that i was wearing this shirt , especially since this was his favorite one , so to soften the blow i stretched forward in my seat with a fresh bowl of chocolate pudding , wiggling it in front of him with a beaming smile.
@psychsmart
sometimes, just sometimes, gus' happy place involves picturing hitting shawn with a rolled up newspaper. repeatedly. every day, shawn gets a little closer to unwittingly making that happy place a happy reality. " that shirt cost me $68, and it was limited edition. " hands find their place on hips, expression unamused. " and you got pudding on it. you better pray that stain comes out, and that your date likes guys with pudding stains on their shirts. you look like an overgrown gerber baby. "
the pudding, however, drives gus away from his happy place... momentarily. make no mistake, he will get revenge for this and it will be equal parts sweet and swift.
They were made for this meme format. I made a LOT more of these.
@psychnot
