astrolo-JEEZ

This chill astrology blog is brought to you by Morgan (virgo/libra) and Zoë (gemini II). We think we're cool, but who are we kidding, so don't take anything too seriously. You're an individual, not just a sign.For questions such as 'Are ___ and ___ compatible?' and 'What does ___ in ___ mean?' or 'Sexuality?' please refer to our FAQ. We will no longer answer these.

[punkrockzodiac]

why you're problematic

aries: ur so fucking adorable when ur passionate

taurus: u stick up for what u believe in

gemini: u encourage everyone to be their best

cancer: u allow urself to feel ur emotions

leo: ur hair is really smooth wtf

virgo: ur blog is the bomb.com

libra: style so sharp it could cut a bitch

scorpio: ur so smooth when u talk even tho u say ur awk

sagittarius: ur little poems and drawings are so cute

capricorn: ur ability to understand others is legendary

aquarius: u always kno just what to say

pisces: u give out the best compliments

[punkrockzodiac]

The Signs as Game Grumps Quotes

Aries:

Danny:You've got twenty nuts.

Arin:Some say...

Arin:

Arin:...I'm nuts.

Danny:You make another joke like that, and I'm gonna have to beat you to death with your own shoes.

Taurus:

Arin:When it says player two, that's you.

Danny:Is it because I'm twice as cool as you?

Gemini: We are so smart, Brian. With your Phd and my also being here, we can solve any problem.

Cancer: ‘Bonfire’ is made up of two words: ‘bonf’ and 'ire.’

Leo:

Arin:Who the hell is tryin' to call me?

Danny:I am.

Danny:

Danny:*whispering* Pick up. It's love on the line.

Virgo: Does anyone have a paper bag I can hyperventilate into?

Libra: Water is just… air juice.

Scorpio: Like I would kill a friend… without watching.

Sagittarius: And I missed. So I fired again. And I missed. And then I missed again. And I fired again, and then I missed. And then I fired, then I fired again, I missed both times. And then I fired and I missed. This went on for several hours. And then I fired, and then I missed. And then I was out of bullets, and then I got sad. I had a popsicle, and then I passed out in the snow. And then I woke up, and then I reloaded and I fired, and then I missed. I missed again, then I fired and I hit something, but it wasn’t what I was going for, so I guess I missed. I passed out again. Had another popsicle. I had a dream that I was firing at something. I missed. I threw up a snowball at em’, and I missed. I packed another snowball into my gun, that’s my secret weapon. I missed. Yeah, she’s really somethin’, I threw a snowball at her, I missed. I passed out. I woke up with a popsicle stick in my mouth. Don’t give me sass woman, I’ll take a swing at ya, I’ll miss though, I guarantee ya. I’ll take another swing, and I’ll miss. Then I’ll have myself a popsicle. Would ya care for a popsicle? Just don’t bring it into the sauna. Yeah. I reached into the fridge for another popsicle, I missed. I got the package, I put it back, but I missed. I dropped it on the floor. Long story short? Missed.

Capricorn:

Arin:Running through a tunnel is my middle name

Danny:It is not. It is Joseph.

Aquarius:Is this whole game a Christian allegory for redemption?

Pisces: Who wears pants anymore? So 2015.

[punkrockzodiac]

signs when camping

the ones who really enjoy the nature: taurus, pisces, cancer, virgo

the ones who complain about mosquitos: aquarius, leo, aries, libra

the ones who stay in the tent the whole day: gemini, scorpio, sagittarius, capricorn

[lilhippiedreamer]

10 Reasons to Hate Donald Trump

1. His ex wife admitted that he forced her into sexual situations.

2. He wants to spend billions of dollars of our already dwindling budget to build a wall to stop Mexicans from coming into the country.

3. When asked hard hitting and relevant questions by a female he avoided them and went on to blame it on her period.

4. He gave out a senators private number out of spite.

5. If he can’t fix his hair how can we expect him to fix our economy?

6. He accused all immigrants of being rapists.

7. He believes immigrants stealing jobs is actually a thing.

8. He believes that sexual assault is to be expected when men and women are put together.

9. He’s disgusted by breast feeding.

10. He’s overall just a sexist, racist bully who uses his money in order to push people around. 

[punkrock-astrology]

I’m not even american but oh my god don’t let this scumbag be your fucking president

[sagethedinosaur]

11. He wants to shut down all mosques, though he knows that it may be illegal

12. He wants to make all Muslims wear a badge and carry an ID that says that they’re Muslim

Remind you of anything?

[borenii-deactivated20160609]

Reblogging again for that^

[polkadot-cookie]

13. He said that autistic children just need to be properly disciplined and that people suffering through depression and PTSD are acting as though they’re the first generation to struggle with these issues.

[bogbitchthings]

everyone needs to see this

[e123-omga]

14. He wanted to set up a “humane deportation force” That would rid America of Illegal immigrants.    

Eerily enough, the Nazis had proposed a similar idea of wanting the Jews out of Europe; to set up a deportation force to exile the Jews from Europe. (source)

Wake up America.You are literally voting for the modern Adolf Hitler

[just-the-way-youre-not-blog]

15. He made fun of a NY Times reporter’s disability.

[bushra-aa]

16. He said that if he would date Ivanka if she wasnt his daughter.

[teacupstudies]

i’m not american but seriously how did that guy even become relevant in the first place??!? IF YOU CAN VOTE GO VOTE FOR ANYONE BUT HIM NOBODY IS GOING TO DO IT FOR YOU YOU HAVE TO DO IT FOR YOURSELF AND YOUR COUNTRY

[venusknife-deactivated20230323]

straight people are so fucking wild today my coworker informed me that cafés are for women and bars are for men and her husband refuses to enter starbucks in case they think hes gay ?? whats up next in Incredibly Unnecessary Gendering

[punkrockzodiac]

Lmao one time my 2 best friends and I were chillin in a Starbucks and a group of like 4 college age guys were like GIGGLING at the table next to us and then out of nowhere one comes and takes the seat next to my friend and he was like "how's it going?" "Where do you go to school?" And we were just like wtf who r u. Long story short, those guys seemed to be enjoying THEIR Starbucks @modsunflower - mo

[vangoghgurl-blog]

i would like to blame tumblr for my horrible language and heredity for my anger issues because today i screamed “WHAT THE FUCK, GEORGE?!” to my gym teacher in soccer

[punkrockzodiac]

What he say

[otaku-astrology-deactivated2016]

The Signs Doing Homework

Cries: Cancer, Pisces Burns It: Aries ,Sagittarius , Gemini, Scorpio Actually Does It: Libra, Virgo, Capricorn Procrastinates Until Last Minute: Taurus, Aquarius, Leo

[punkrockzodiac]

The signs as Halloween decorations

Aries:Creepy clown

Taurus:Jack-o-lanterns

Gemini:Fake bats and crows

Cancer:Fake spiderwebs

Leo:Damaged porcelain dolls

Virgo:Hanging ghost

Libra:Coffin with animated vampire

Scorpio:Skeletons

Sagittarius:Recording of diabolical laughter

Capricorn:Tombstones

Aquarius:A giant candy corn

Pisces:Fog with ominous lighting

[catinued-deactivated20190902]

i just wanna say from the bottom of my heart yikes

[punkrockzodiac]

Bands explained

My Chemical Romance: I suck

Green Day: You suck

Twenty One Pilots: We all suck

Panic! At the Disco: We all suck... dick

[dark-astrology-deactivated20180]

genuinely surprised that today has been a hate free day. amazing

[biphoenix]

[astrokisses]

The dad: taurus, pisces, cancer, leo, aquarius, gemini

The girl/guy: virgo, aries, capricorn, sagittarius, scorpio, libra

[punkrockzodiac]

Secretly or obviously mean?

Secretly: Taurus, Cancer, LIBRA, Aquarius, Pisces, Gemini

Obviously: Aries, Leo, Virgo, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn

[punkrockzodiac]

I'm literally sitting in my room, while scrolling through nine thousand pages of information about Stanford and crying because I want to go so bad. What is my life? -mo

[fawun]

unfollowing me wont help you lose your virginity

[punkrockzodiac]

Oh shit

[punkrockzodiac]

Most To Least Likely To Give You The Cold Shoulder When Angry

Virgo

Scorpio

Cancer

Capricorn

Libra

Pisces

Gemini

Aquarius

Taurus

Leo

Sagittarius

Aries

*Check Mars

[punkrockzodiac]

what Amortentia smells like to the signs

Aries: smoke

Taurus: doughnuts

Gemini: bacon frying

Cancer: flowers

Leo: new book

Virgo: ocean water

Libra: rain

Scorpio: pine tree

Sagittarius: chocolate

Capricorn: a coffee shop

Aquarius: honey and spices

Pisces: the person you love