save the bees

im a witch

[seravph]

“what’s the worst fruit” i hope you fucking die im strangling you what the hell is wrong with you. ‘the worst fruit’… has god not made all of these fruits in the same light???? cunt

[rottenlittlefink]

Red Delicious Apples

[punk-rocking-nerd]

[parakeet]

5th from the bottom on applerankings.com

[voidsentprinces]

May I someday gain the same level of succinct cutting vitriol criticism as the applerankings.

[3000s]

we are in truble

[edwad]

describe nyc in 3 words

new york city

[3000s]

last night was talking to my dad about career plans and he goes "i dont know if you should do a trade, you should print tshirts and sell them at the oceanfront"

[3000s]

👆👆👆 literally how it is

[literallyjustaspider-deactivate]

[nyctosaurid]

I didn’t watch supernatural because it’s a monster hunting show but I never saw a single person talk about the monsters. bad sign

[nyctosaurid]

I’m opening a charity to reimburse anyone who watched more than 5 episodes of this show

[greelin]

“you’re allowed to relax, you know” unfortunately i cannot do that. Otherwise they will get me

[fairycosmos]

for about a month in the early 2010s people used to say things like climate change is real and gay people deserve rights. does anyone remember this

[freakoutgirl]

the internet seems like a distant dream

[freakoutgirl]

whatever we are on rn is not the internet. It's ads

[teaboot]

I wasn’t gonna talk about it but one of my parents died the other day and the weirdest part has been not talking about it, specifically because they sucked and I kind of don’t care and that’s not a very hashtag relateable thing to bring up around the office so I’m just walking around at work rn like “nah not much going on hbu”

[teaboot]

As a “dark humour is my coping mechanism” person I would describe this feeling as “children’s birthday clown with a flashbang grenade” and I gotta say, the deeply fucked up power is intoxicating

[teaboot]

Man with the power to end any conversation

[katjohnadams]

[lurks-no-more]

As the saying goes, the difference between having nothing and having a billion dollars is a billion dollars.

The difference between having a million dollars and having a billion dollars is also a billion dollars.

That million is 0.1% of the billion dollars; it's a literal rounding error.

[prismatic-bell]

That person with a million dollars is one cancer diagnosis from broke.

That person with a billion dollars doesn't understand why the rest of us get so mad about healthcare, because we should just put it on a credit card and pay it off next month like they do.

And lest you think that's me being hyperbolic:

The late Rush Limbaugh, net worth $600 million (so a little over half a billion), actually said this on his radio show. This is not a hypothetical example I made up.

[dogpuppy]

[auxphono]

Please please please don't click those phishing texts

[auxphono]

[isawken]

love when you go to an aquarium and you really hit it off with one of the fish

[mercurialmilk]

New reaction image for ‘posting something on the internet and having it be wildly misinterpreted’

[human-pet-they]

Your therapist asks you "Who in this image do you see yourself as?" and then shows you a drawing of two shirtless skinny anime catboys with a thread of saliva going between their lips

[sour-charity]

It was actually just an ink blot but thank you, this gives me a lot to work with

[ciqqy]

I will lock in tomorrow like nobody has ever locked in before

[ciqqy]