Quite Vexing™

Like one of those cymbal monkeys but deadlier.

[sailormoonsub]

Oh well if I *HAVE* to continue to make a ton of beautiful girls fall in love with me then I suppose I will manage to live with it

[comebackbehere]

BYE KSKDLAMDKDSM

[pathological-people-pleaser]

I cannot tell you guys how much I’ve laughed at this yesterday, the comments on the willow mv are PRICELESS! 😂😂

For those of you wondering what the Swift rule is, every time Taylor releases an album, Corinthians (one of the big soccer teams in Brazil) doesn’t lose the previous and upcoming game. Like, never. And this weekend they were going to play the currently best team in Brazil, and regional rival. The other team was on a winning streak, but the swift rule is unbeatable.

But it doesn’t stop there!! People really believe taylor is some kind of patron saint of Corinthians, not only the Swift rule is definitely a thing, but Corinthians had never won a national championship while Taylor wasn’t born, first time was in 1990. And there is more, back in the day we still had playoffs for the main championship, and guess when was the final that crowned Corinthians champion? December 13th.

[karmaismybf]

SOME GEMS ON THE WILLOW MV COMMENTS:

“saint george in heaven (patreon saint of Corinthians) and taylor swift on earth. go miss corinthiana”

“it was never luck it was always taylor swift. go corinthians!”

“I was always prejudiced to hear taylor songs but since she blessed Corinthias i have started to listen and they are good. thank you taylor. go corinthias”

[birbliophile]

"Taylor Swift is the patron saint of a Brazilian soccer team" is not something I expected to learn today

[teatraysandtypewriters]

When Harry becomes the DADA professor, kids constantly ask him for an autograph, but he refuses, saying the only thing he’ll autograph is a detention slip. Eventually, though, he starts carrying around a stack of autographed pictures of Ginny, which he gives out when people ask for an autograph. It gets really popular, so he starts mixing it up with autographs from other people, mostly Ron and Hermione. But the students love it, so he adds more. Soon he’s giving out autographs from like fifty different people, including all the teachers at Hogwarts, and a bunch of other random people like Luna, Lee Jordan, Oliver Wood, etc. He even has some fairly rare ones from Krum and Fleur. It becomes a game in Hogwarts to collect all the autographs, like chocolate frog cards. Some of them are more limited edition than others, like signatures from all the ghosts (though Harry won’t reveal how he managed to get those). George starts to offer a discount at Weasleys’ Wizard Wheezes (and a prize autograph from Peeves, who will only sign Bertie Bott’s scratch-and-sniff cards) to anyone who can prove they’ve collected the whole set. Harry provides him with up-to-date lists of autographs to check against. Every Hogsmeade weekend there’s a line of Hogwarts students in WWW’s Hogsmeade branch trying to get the discount.

At some point a seventh year comes up to Harry and asks for his autograph, but not as the Savior of the Wizarding World, but because they now have the autograph of every other Hogwarts teacher and want Professor Potter’s to go with them. Harry–trying not to tear up–agrees, but only in exchange for the student’s signature. He begins offering this deal to all departing seventh years, his autograph in exchange for theirs. He tells them it’s in case they ever get famous, so he can add it as a limited edition autograph, but really he keeps them all in a big binder just for himself, to remember all his students. (A couple times, though, when a students does become famous, he will contact them and ask if they’d like to be added to the game. So far no one has said no.)

When Teddy starts at Hogwarts he begins a black market autograph trade because he has access to a lot of the people Harry gets autographs from. Harry’s other three children proudly continue the trade when they get to Hogwarts. They’re all secretly aided by Ginny.

[bixgirl1]

I love this incredibly much.

[quinntessentialharley]

Dragonborn should have darkvision that's all I'm saying

[captainkirkk]

Ok but Zuko using the knowledge he acquired during his banishment to help him as the Fire Lord. Like making small talk with Earth Kingdom dignitaries about their local foods that he enjoyed and even misses. Like having in-depth conversations with his captains about sea currents and navigation. Like, in the middle of a meeting with several high-ranking naval officials, pointing out flails in security, like how a person can cling to a Fire Nation ship for hours at a time, or climb aboard using hatches on the upper decks, or disguise themselves as a lower ranking guard with easily accessible spare armour….

Though none of his experiences can prepare Zuko for the long, awkward silence that comes after he admits to doing or at least knowing something illegal and/or completely buck wild

[cinthi-lante]

fire lord zuko: you should maybe revisit the security measures around the water ducts that the sealturtles use

northern water tribe leader: that’s not necessary, no one can survive submerged in the artic ocean for so many minutes

zuko:

zuko: remember that time the fire nation attacked you

[chucktaylorupset]

Zuko: okay first you have to promise not to get mad

[funnelcloudd]

How come semi trucks in Europe look like “toot toot :)” and in North America they look like “HONK HOOOOOOOONK >:|”

[funnelcloudd]

“Henlo I am big twuck pwease give me wots of woom tank u :)”

“I WILL FUCKING PANCAKE YOUR CUCK ASS”

[rat-knife]

[gala-xytoffee]

Speaking as a truck driver, do you guys wanna know the real reason???

[kholden83]

yes please, I'm very curious.

[gala-xytoffee]

The top pic is a day cab, basically anyone who drives that regularly most likely goes home at the end of their shift, its probably not going through any particuarly dangerous terrain, which makes sense cause, well iys england, its not very large

The second one however probably takes loads from california to new york (or any of the mainland states actually, most produce loads come from california) it can pull most any load depending (i pull refers so i only know those loads) and tgose drivers dont go home for weeks or months at a time, we live in those trucks

Anythong from the pink line and back is living space, usually just a bed and mini fridge, and since it runs almost nonstop, expecially if its being driven by a team, the engine needs to be able to handle it, thats why the front isnt as large with the first one

Also the top one is smaller since it spends more time on city streets and needs to be able to do tighter turns

[aseriouscomedian]

[adoring-suggestion]

When your dad tries to guilt trip you into visiting him: “well I guess I’ll just spend the weekend all by myself...”

You say “glad to know we’re on the same page.” Slowly, he will have to adapt to just outright telling you what he thinks instead of playing mind games.

When your friend tries to hint that they’re mad at you without saying anything: “Oh, I’m fine, clearly you don’t need to worry about me,”

You say: “I’m glad you’re doing well. Call me if you want to talk, though!” Soon enough, they will accept that they can’t be passive aggressive with you.

When your boyfriend says: “All your friends are great, I really love *insert male friend* especially.”

You say: “I’m so glad you like my friends! I should invite them back soon.” He needs to understand that if he has a problem with your friends, he needs to just voice his concerns instead of being sarcastic and accusatory.

As someone who has lived through several toxic relationships and has an abusive father, I think one of the most important manipulation tools a toxic person has is excessive subtext and hidden meanings in their conversation. It hides all of the actual fighting from the eyes of onlookers while still hurting you, which is scary and makes you feel like you’re making it all up. Don’t put up with this bs. Make them stop hiding.

Make. Them. Say. What. They. Mean.

[fluent-in-lesbianism]

So a few months ago I asked this girl out. She said she couldn't because she was bisexual and I of course said that this doesn't matter to me. Then she clarified that she means that she is attracted to girls only from July to December and if I wanted to we could meet up in July. I thought she was messing with me but she did call me two weeks ago and we have been dating ever since. And I checked her social media and yeah she only dates girls for half an year. I am baffled. Have you heard of this?

[fluent-in-lesbianism]

But why only date women 6 months out of the year? And has she said what she’s gonna do if y’all continue to date up to her cut off point in December? Is all this linked to her Tarot work?

Honestly, is she willing to hold a panel? Because I have so many questions…

[fluent-in-lesbianism]

The stunning conclusion to the Bisephone Saga that somehow manages to raise more questions than it answers:

[anistarrose]

TAZ Balance is very good, because in what other world would:

the character spoken of in prophecy and identified only as “the Lover”

the crimson red, immensely powerful specter who created one of the most dangerous magical items in the universe and rasps out cryptic messages whenever he appears

and Jeans Dad, The World’s Worst Bodyguard

all turn out to be the same person?

[thejonymyster]

i thot the beatles died

[bedeliadumaurier]

I just want everyone to know my wife has been laughing at this post for like three full minutes, she’s literally in tears and in three years together I’ve never seen her laugh this hard????

[thejonymyster]

my wife now

[braidedlily]

< THIS USER IS MAD AT SYFY FOR CANCELLING DARK MATTER

.

[raniatsaran]

PEPPER, a girl, has a wooden sword and is battling BRIAN, a grubby boy with a toy crown.

WENSLEYDALE, a thoughtful, bespectavled boy, has a battered book of 1001 Scientific Things a Boy Can Do. He is weighing a potato against a stone on an improvised scales, adding stones to the pan to get them to balance…

[deactivated-blog]

Jasmine x Tiana

[hometcwn]

[lithiumbarbiedoll]

SAY IT AS LOUD AS YOU CAN

WRITE THIS ON EVERYTHING

PUT THIS ON A FUCKING PLAQUE IN EVER LAW OFFICE, MILITARY BASE, AND ORGANIZATIONAL HALLS.

[ohevoyev]

thor was the funniest avenger. all he did was pretend to be dumb and clown them constantly

[ohevoyev]

thor: good morning idiots

tony: you know idiot isn’t like.. something you just walk in and call people

thor: it’s a term of endearment on asgard, rat man

[boingmann]

ok but imagine a roomba that’s programmed to react positively when being scratched or petted 

[boingmann]

#or a roomba that’s programmed to recognize their owner and drive up to them for no other reason than to be petted

[boingmann]

roomba company, please make this happen

[fire-is-her-water]

I have a Neato Botvac that has an optical sensor to find its way around (Roombas just bump into things and derps off in a random direction) and yesterday it did its “dee-dummm” sad noise while under the couch, stopped what it was doing, and hummed over to me and stopped beside my chair, with its error message saying, “Please dust me off so I can see.” I wiped it off and sent it on its way, and it did its “doo doo do doooo!” of happiness and finished the living room. It’s never done that before, but I like to think that I’ve gained its trust over the past few months, and it knows it can come to me for help.

[sushinfood]

baby boomers: we don’t need robots

everyone else: we don’t deserve robots

[trustlup]

Visit Original Link

This message is for Griffin, it’s from Angus McDonald, boy detective! 

[pbandjaam]

This is adorable I’m gonna cry