[queer-trashmouth]

So uh I made a uquiz for which of my OCs u are

🥺

👉🏻👈🏻

[thoodleoo]

i know i said i did not want to talk about the nolan odyssey but i do have one more nodyssey post in me. i actually think the idea of odysseus understanding his story as existing both in and out of a historic timeframe is a fun way to handle the liminality caused by the story being part of an extensive oral tradition. however having him say "our age of bronze is collapsing" is perhaps not the way i would have done that

[treecitysessions]

[thetursithan]

Ah these children who always create problems for poor mothers....

[king-shit-thembo]

It is incredibly important that everyone knows All Star by Smash Mouth is playing on the radio for the person filming this. 11/10, perfect soundtrack for these shenanigans

[geckyjuno]

my bedsheet is pregnant and it's. the rest of my laundry

[muppetyaoi]

another one for the collection, gang.

[crimeronan]

sometimes i have strong opinions but they're also so inane that halfway through writing a post i'll be like "yeah, this is Absolutely not worth the energy it's taking" and delete everything. but then the opinion is still in my head. and i still want to share it. so within five minutes i go "you know, i bet i can phrase it more succinctly this time" and anyway. you all see where this is going. sometimes i do this four times in a row before i give up on the specific inane opinion and instead write a vague post about the concept of opinions as if that'll satisfy the urge to post the entirety of my inner monologue online. may or may not be relevant to what you're reading right now. and now all our lives have been enriched. you're welcome

[triangleguy]

this should be illegal im so serious

[spellinwaiting]

not many people know this but when talking about your multiple pronoun-using friend you build up a combo meter for every subsequent unique pronoun you use

[okthatsgreat]

anybody out there hiring gay losers. ideally a 100k/year salary and i work for one hour every day when i feel like it. thanks

[smeared1992]

you used to be able to get a job just by circling a listing in a newspaper in red pen

[ratica]

[dahlia-molinas]

if christopher nolan was really the visionary and ground-breaking director everyone claims he is he would have cast ben affleck as penelope

[skinks]

I love that thing when people get a little bit tongue-tied and garble what they’re trying to say so they make a little “blegh” 👅 noise and start over. verbal reset button. hitting the top of the tv to unscramble the signal

[meezer]

haters will see you going to therapy and be like he cant afford sixpenceee heals

[transgenderer]

every spelunker should go in with a cyanide tooth capsule so if they get stuck they can take the gentle way out instead of being tortured by the earth for 72 hours and then dying anyway

[transgenderer]

@kropotkindersurprise said:

it should be an explosive device, so they widen that part of the cave at the same time and no other spelunkers will get stuck there

beautiful vision. i love the idea of a minecraft-style world where if you explode underground it just clears a radius

[videolottery]

Minecraft caves are so dark bro…

[videolottery]

Minecraft Bangladesh

[videolottery]

You got me yeah I steal most of my posts from Minecraft Bangladesh

[mumblesplash]

it's such bs that the whole guilt-ridden stoic self-sacrificing martyr thing doesn't work outside of fiction. repressing all your emotions and neglecting your physical wellbeing should make you god's most tragically beautiful morally unassailable little soldier of righteousness but all it does is give you bad skin and gastrointestinal problems

[mumblesplash]

like what do you MEAN the number 1 sexiest character trait of all time is just kind of offputting and bad for you in real life. next you'll tell me smoking has consequences other than looking like a mysterious badass

[whatdoesthevixensay]

correct

[iliothermia]

Given their presence in my childhood I really thought I'd run into one of these by now

[spinecutter-archive]

my writing gland is purple and swollen

[spinecutter-archive]

my friendship gland is black and shriveled