Quit Asking When

Fertility #struggleisreal - documenting every modern couple’s journey to conceiving a heathy child, while keeping up with the Joneses, Kardashians and living life on the fast lane. X Header image: Unsplash

[quitaskingwhen]

Pills and Needles

7 months in “Actively trying” / TTC-ing or trying to conceive and no one’s mentioned that part of the prep involved this much needles, or pills that requires needles.

Doing a quick log of the medical reviews thus far:

1) Bloodwork - Battery of hormonal level screens to rule out abnormalities

- Came out clean, save for some booster shots I needed to have for Hepatitis B and Cervical Cancer prevention

2) Radiology - Fluoroscopy’s fun! Said no one ever.

- Had a team of 2 nurses and a radiographer Dr inject dye and watched the beautiful fluid display live on the monitor and suffered mad cramps for a day.

- Turned out well: My fallopian tubes aren’t blocked.

3) Needles... 4 jabs in 2 visits!

- Hep B and Gardasil 9 are administered in 2 doses, it seems.

Also, I really gotta say the discomfort of the ow-ie is one thing, but the fatigue that follows the day after is really shite.

Oh and because I’m somewhat dedicated to my work, I opted for a jab on Saturday morning so I can spend Sunday being in a horrid shape. And back to normal on Monday, for work! Yippee.

4) Pills and Liquids - Ovamit and Revosit are interesting add-ons to help with the baby dance.

The former’s apparently ovulation medicine, which usually is followed by a Day 21 Progesterone screen (which the office kinda overlooked - so it’s quite remiss of them to miss that - I have no clue if I had indeed ovulated after that 1 dose, and don’t have an embryo to show for it either.)

The latter’s something which is reminiscent of an effervescent Vitamin C drink - that’s gone flat and leaves a little residue on the tongue when drunk. No bonus points for the added sugars or artificial sweeteners, IMHO.

After all that’s said and done, I feel that it’s really a delicate dance between Nature and Science, this fertilty thing.

A month from my 30th birthday and I’ve come to this realisation that it may or may not happen in the next 2 years - and have our options and mind open towards alternate parenting.

Watch this space.

[quitaskingwhen]

#QuitAskingWhen

#MaybeBabyWoes

Guys, it’s been rough.

I suspect we lost a mini bean at < 4 weeks.

PM me if you want to see the evidence of suspected pregnancy - images are gory but you can see and know.

#QUITASKINGWHEN is something I’m wildly passionate about. Link in bio

From a place of grief and loss, comes this idea that we should step away from the shame of fertility struggles to a position of strength: knowledge empowers.

Instead of asking *when* newlyweds would be parents, and looking out for the next IG ultrasound pregnancy announcement, here’re some questions I’d like to ask the next newlywed wife:

Let’s have a conversation about women’s health - shift the attention a little away from #obstetrics to #gynecology.

Often, people look so much at the littles and forget that Mamas also need to be in good health.

I didn’t have a great experience as a first-time would-be Mom seeking medical attention. The first instance I had a weird bleed, I headed straight for the ER.

I didn’t look for a gynae - and didn’t know where to begin. Singapore’s lovely and we have a glut of options.

... And that was what made it so confusing!

A healthy, full pregnancy remains one of the least discussed topic - it’s almost taboo to talk about PCOS, miscarriages, ovarian cysts, cystic fibrosis...

And yet: when I announced on FB that we might’ve had lost our little bean, there was an outpouring of emotions from private messages - of other women who’ve been through worse circumstances of multiple miscarriages.

Fertility #struggleisreal - let’s have a conversation about informed choices and options.

[quitaskingwhen]

“Are you guys trying?”

.

“Any good news yet?”

.

“When’s the baby coming?”

- Every person who’s not paying for nor preparing for the baby.