Do you have a theory on whats going on with Roman to make him almost snap??
I have some thoughts: He is Thomasās ego, he was literally bruised in an episode. I think he is afraid that he is unable to help Thomas, to be the hero he thinks he needs to be. He also in the span of this episode was basically told that his selfless act of leaving Thomasās dreams behind to go to the wedding was basically pointless because ultimately they should have talked to Lee and Mary-Lee which he was obviously upset that they didnāt because he sounded very bitter when he brought it up that the idea was shut down. Now Thomas is listening to Deceit, a villain in his eyes, and he is supposed to be a hero, someone who fihts the villains! On top of that, Deceit compares him to Remus, the very person he never wants to be because Remus is everything Thomas despises.Ā
Thereās a LOT happening with Roman right now, a lot of internal struggles. He already has canonical self esteem issues and has been bringing up the fact that heās worried he might not be useful or needed. Way back he talked about how maybe Thomas has no need for princes or heroes and now here he is much later definitely feeling the same way? And through the wholeĀ āargumentāĀ ādiscussionā thing, he was trying VERY hard to phrase things nicely. He literally sugar coated his nicknames if you go back and listen he stops himself from saying a thing is stupid so when it slips out and he makes fun of Janusās name? When his careful work trying to do good slips and heās called as bad as or worse than Remus, of course he;s upset.Ā
There was a LOT at stake in not going to the callback. Roman gave up something that it is his job and in his core functions to do and gave it up in the hopes thatĀ ādoing the right thing for othersā would make them feel better.Ā
And then even though Thomas says how he was feeling was one of the dumbest things he has ever said, Roman still came to the conclusion that all of this is his fault. Thereās a guilt inside him thatās really really deep and I donāt know if this is something thatās Pattonās fault. I think itās because Roman is part of the Ego. As someone who gives and gives and has trouble taking for myself, you get this idea into your head that your own desires are less valuableĀ than other peopleās wants. Thatā¦ your own dreams are second. Romanās self-esteem issues I think tie into this. He wants to be needed, craves to be heard and listened to and Thomasās dreams followed and desires met.Ā
But how often has he backed down? Like all the freaking time. Heās constantly TRYING to compromise for Logan and Virgil and Thomas and Patton. The one time he tries to express his desires, they shoot him down and Thomas admits he is a liar and that this decision to want his desires are WRONG.Ā
But even more so he was praised for this choice. Not only did Patton think he made the right decision but Thomas did too and Roman accepted and intuited that his self-sacrifice of his very functions was not only good but necessary. Deceit literally told him it was the bravest most selfless thing he;s ever seen but that this action was wrong.Ā
He must be so conflicted, so confused as to what heās supposed to do, who he;s supposed to be, why he does and thinks what he does and now on top of it heās told heās indistinguishable from the evil twin? The one person thatās literally everything he doesnāt want to be? What a slap in the face especially because he IS trying.Ā
Iām so worried about Roman, so so worried about whatās going on in his head. Patton used to hide how he feels (and he;s afraid to open up but he;s trying) but Roman buries it, scoops it all under the rug and tries to move on, tries to compromise, tries to give give give give and what the heck is he getting in return? Right now it feels like a whole lotta nothing and I WANT HIM TO BE OK.Ā
Someone go help him, go tell him he;s needed and that his contributions are valued and his wants are important dammit!Ā
Ok Iāll get off my soap box.
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amandla
stormborns
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