Quality Crayon

A blog of random craziness

[geekoftv]

It's been said ain't nobody got big balls than Dean Ambrose"

[dangered]

She is half human and half hurricane, a half that’s living to destroy and a half that’s trying to survive.

(via dangered)

[cyborgsmanifesto]

dealing with the worst case scenario

your condom breaks

you feel a lump on your breast

your friends are ignoring you

you’re stranded on an island 

you got rejected by a crush

you get into a car accident

you got stung by a bee/wasp

you got fired from your job

you’re in an earthquake

your tattoo gets infected

your house is on fire

you’re lost in the woods

you get arrested abroad

you get robbed

your partner cheated on you

you’re on a ship that’s sinking

you fall into ice

you’re stuck in an elevator

you hit a deer with your car

you have food poisoning

your pet passed away

you fall off of a horse

you or your friend has alcohol poisoning

you have toxic shock syndrome

your house has a gas leak

[4velitta4]

I feel like this could be useful in my future

[astrologypixies-deactivated2016]

REBLOG THIS. I CANNOT STRESS HOW IMPORTANT THIS GUIDES ARE, BOOST THIS SHIT

[sciencescribbler]

THIS IS SUCH A USEFUL LIST OMFG

[millennial-review-deactivated20]

[official-north-korea-blog]

Minimum wage: $7.25

$7.25 x 40 hour full time work week: $290

$290 x 4 weeks per month: $1,160

In every Southern state (didn’t have time to look at the rest of the country) you can find some sort of studio apartment for around $500 per month, sometimes less than that. Why bother lying about something so easily disproven? 

[father-of-hope-and-fury]

Because Bernie Sanders supporters aren’t going to fact check him, and they’ll ignore any contrary evidence that’s presented to them anyways.

[fartsandprayers]

Things like this really tick me off and It’s not political or anything but it’s the fact that you think all that money is there. Here’s what I mean;

That weekly check comes to, according to you, 290. Most places DO NOT pay for your half hour lunch that is required by law. So your beginning number was wrong. $7.25 x 7.5 hours a day x 5 days a week only gets you $271.88.  Most people in America get paid bi-weekly, so let’s double it to get the budget. $543.75. That’s GROSS, not NET. Out of that comes anywhere between 10% and 15% taxes depending on state so we’ll low ball it at 10%. Automatically down to $489.38 a pay check. Now health insurance. Usually anywhere from 70-100 a pay check for the cheapest plans. Again, we’ll low ball and go $70. So now we have $419.39 a paycheck. x 2  = $839. 

Eight hundred thirty nine dollars. A MONTH.

But again, you seem to think that’s fair. So let’s proceed. You say rent is $500? Okay. This person now has $339 left to buy groceries for the whole month, pay utilities, car payment, car insurance, and gas money to get to work. 

Those are the bare needs. You have to eat. You have to pay for heat, water, garbage removal, gas and or electricity because apartments do not always include things and rarely all of the above. Most cities in America do not have public transportation. Mine doesn’t despite the fact that our population is over 15,000 people, not counting a taxi. If you have a car, you have to pay that. If you have a car, legally you have to have car insurance. You have to pay that. You have to have gas in that car to get to work to make that money.

Now if you can tell me you can get all of that out of $339 you’re lying.

You are so focused on rent that you aren’t thinking about everything else people have to pay for. Rent was an example. This is a breakdown of the budget you gave me and it’s not possible to live off that in 2017 America. 

And BECAUSE this person makes over $800 a month, they probably won’t qualify for financial aid or food stamps. $800 is the line in my state where they won’t help you. No food stamps, financial aid, or government housing if you make more than $800 a month. 

Why does it bother you that people deserve to live above the poverty line?

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Conservatives like the first two commenters love alternative mathematics.

[deucalio]

Alternative mathematics 😂😂😂😂 But for real where tf are people finding a $500.00 a month apartment that is NOT student or student style-living? Shit, my basic ass apartment is almost $900.00 a month BEFORE utilities! Luckily I drive an old ass car that I don’t make payments on…every southern state my ass. I live in Florida btw

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Buck and I’s one bedroom is $1,200 a month in a SUBURB of Denver. Regardless, the math just doesn’t add up, and let me tell you something else: most places require proof of income in the form of showing you make AT LEAST twice (three times as much for our combined income in this complex and most of Denver and its suburbs) as much as the actual rent cost a month and have great credit before you’re approved, and that’s not counting deposits and application fees. The first people are clearly mommy and daddy money babies who have never had to apply for an apartment to rent in their lives. BYE!

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

Point is, people who really think you can live off minimum wage and can easily find an apartment for $500 are delusional and have never had to live in the adult world under this economy. I couldn’t imagine what Buck and I would do or where would we live if we made minimum wage instead of what we make, because we still have a tight budget considering how much above minimum wage we make.

[sodomymcscurvylegs]

And no, “why don’t you move to a less expensive area?” isn’t really an option. Moving to a less expensive area usually translate to moving to areas with high crime in the same state or moving to a different state. First off, being on minimum wage isn’t an ethical reason to subject someone to being stuck in cities and suburbs with high crime rates, literally putting their lives at risk, and if you think it is, you’re a pile of human garbage. Second of all, moving to another state is fucking COSTLY, and there isn’t a guarantee that these people will find jobs in different states. They live virtually paycheck to paycheck and you expect them to do what…? “Save up” hundreds and thousands of dollars to move to the middle of nowhere? Nah. I hate this bullshit thinking. I’m tired of the fact that some rich jackoff who profits off the labor of his underpaid workers can afford three yatchs, but the moment someone who is paid minimum wage asks for wages to match rising cost of living, they’re “the problem.” Literally, fuck ALL the way off if this is your mentality.

[poehlers]

[mayahan]

Creative Dioramas by Tatsuya Tanaka

[bokwoorm]

[onceland]

[writing-prompt-s]

You suddenly hear boss fight music

[writing-prompt-s]

It’s New Year’s Eve 2017. As the clock hits midnight, time freezes. A display appears in the air in front of you, and it it lists two options: “Continue?” Or “Load Previous Autosave: January 1, 2016”

[highfiveshiningstrike]

REPRESENTATION MATTERS [X]

[hedaswarrior]

[endgamez009]

Class act. She gets it

[zvaigzdelasas]

And the best headline of the year goes to….

[cumaeansibyl]

you guys I found the article and it’s fantastic

they did in-depth interviews with 137 scientists and about 35% of them mentioned Dawkins unprompted, and about 80% of those were apparently just desperate to tell someone how much they hate him

[vergess]

28% of scientists hate Richard Dawkins so much that they just start spouting off about his bullshit unprompted.

[sage-nebula]

[pururin]

[daggers-drawn]

AI is far more relatable than we ever imagined.

[maxknightley]

hook it up to shitpostgenerator and alternate posting styles and that shit would pass the turing test no question

[dracolizardlars]

AI creators: we have created Intelligence

Everyone: You fucked up a perfectly good computer program is what you did. Look at it, it’s got depression

[goregutz-moved]

what happend

[raivasm]

I wish I could help you all. I feel your pain and see you struggling, but I'm at a loss. I want to fight your battles so you don't have to, so you can rest. Hold tight, know I am here, and use me for the little I am good for.

[ms-mazarin]

Words to replace said, except this actually helps

I got pretty fed up with looking for words to replace said because they weren’t sorted in a way I could easily use/find them for the right time. So I did some myself.

IN RESPONSE TO Acknowledged Answered Protested

INPUT/JOIN CONVERSATION/ASK Added Implored Inquired Insisted Proposed Queried Questioned Recommended Testified

GUILTY/RELUCTANCE/SORRY Admitted Apologized Conceded Confessed Professed

FOR SOMEONE ELSE Advised Criticized Suggested

JUST CHECKING Affirmed Agreed Alleged Confirmed

LOUD Announced Chanted Crowed

LEWD/CUTE/SECRET SPY FEEL Appealed Disclosed Moaned

ANGRY FUCK OFF MATE WANNA FIGHT Argued Barked Challenged Cursed Fumed Growled Hissed Roared Swore

SMARTASS Articulated Asserted Assured Avowed Claimed Commanded Cross-examined Demanded Digressed Directed Foretold Instructed Interrupted Predicted Proclaimed Quoted Theorized

ASSHOLE Bellowed Boasted Bragged

NERVOUS TRAINWRECK Babbled Bawled Mumbled Sputtered Stammered Stuttered

SUAVE MOTHERFUCKER Bargained Divulged Disclosed Exhorted

FIRST OFF Began

LASTLY Concluded Concurred

WEAK PUSY Begged Blurted Complained Cried Faltered Fretted

HAPPY/LOL Cajoled Exclaimed Gushed Jested Joked Laughed

WEIRDLY HAPPY/EXCITED Extolled Jabbered Raved

BRUH, CHILL Cautioned Warned

ACTUALLY, YOU’RE WRONG Chided Contended Corrected Countered Debated Elaborated Objected Ranted Retorted

CHILL SAVAGE Commented Continued Observed Surmised

LISTEN BUDDY Enunciated Explained Elaborated Hinted Implied Lectured Reiterated Recited Reminded Stressed

BRUH I NEED U AND U NEED ME Confided Offered Urged

FINE Consented Decided

TOO EMO FULL OF EMOTIONS Croaked Lamented Pledged Sobbed Sympathized Wailed Whimpered

JUST SAYING Declared Decreed Mentioned Noted Pointed out Postulated Speculated Stated Told Vouched

WASN’T ME Denied Lied

EVIL SMARTASS Dictated Equivocated Ordered Reprimanded Threatened

BORED Droned Sighed

SHHHH IT’S QUIET TIME Echoed Mumbled Murmured Muttered Uttered Whispered

DRAMA QUEEN Exaggerated Panted Pleaded Prayed Preached

OH SHIT Gasped Marveled Screamed Screeched Shouted Shrieked Yelped Yelled

ANNOYED Grumbled Grunted Jeered Quipped Scolded Snapped Snarled Sneered

ANNOYING Nagged

I DON’T REALLY CARE BUT WHATEVER Guessed Ventured

I’M DRUNK OR JUST BEING WEIRDLY EXPRESSIVE FOR A POINT/SARCASM Hooted Howled Yowled

I WONDER Pondered Voiced Wondered

OH, YEAH, WHOOPS Recalled Recited Remembered

SURPRISE BITCH Revealed

IT SEEMS FAKE BUT OKAY/HA ACTUALLY FUNNY BUT I DON’T WANT TO LAUGH OUT LOUD Scoffed Snickered Snorted

BITCHY Tattled Taunted Teased

[writing-reigns-deactivated20200]

reblog to save a writer 

[whispersandwhiskerburn]

Reblog because the titles for each category are comedy gold.

[godbriel-deactivated20190715]

reblog for future reference

[bisexual-poptart-deactivated201]

I didn’t realize I needed this until now.

[blue-vulcan-deactivated20230728]

ohh my god, reblogging for the titles XDXDXD

[raivasm]

Reblogging for later use

[kendrajk]

Informative Ancient Egypt Comics: BROS

Our 1st place contest winner requested a Niankhkhnum and Khnumhotep comic as their prize.

[samandriel]

I took a class about Ancient Egypt last semester and we had a whole lecture dedicated to talking about how gay Niankhkhnum and Khnumhotep were. Their tomb walls were decorated with scenes of them ignoring their wives in favor of embracing each other. In one scene, the couple is seated at a banquet table that is usually reserved for a husband and wife. There’s an entire motif of Khnumhotep holding lotus flowers which in ancient Egyptian tradition symbolizes femininity. Khnumhotep offers the lotus flower to Niankhkhnum, something that only wives were ever depicted as doing for their husbands. In fact, Khnumhotep is repeatedly depicted as uniquely feminine, being shown smaller and shorter than his partner Niankhkhnum and being placed in the role of a woman. Size is a big deal in Egyptian art, husbands are almost always shown as being larger and taller than their wives. So for two men of equal status to be shown in once again, a marital fashion, is pretty telling. Not to mention they were literally buried together which is the strongest bond two people could share in ancient Egypt, as it would mean sharing the journey to the afterlife together. And yet 90% of the academic text about these two talks about these clues in vague terms and analyze the great “brotherhood” they shared, and the enigma of Khnumhotep being depicted as feminine. Apparently it’s too hard for archaeologists to accept homosexuality in the ancient world, as well as the possibility of trans individuals.

[aeacustero]

On the last note, I was walking around the Field Museum of Natural History in Chicago and there is a mummy on exhibit. It caught my attention because the panel that was describing it was talking about how it was a woman’s body in a male coffin and wow, the Egyptian working that day really screwed that up. My summary, not actual words, sorry I can’t remember verbatim but it basically said that someone screwed up.

They claimed that the Egyptians screwed up a burial.

The Egyptians. Screwed up. A burial.

Now I’m not an expert in Ancient Egypt but from what I know, and what the exhibit was telling me, burials and the afterlife and all that jazz DEFINED the Egyptian religion and culture. They don’t just ‘screw up’. So instead of thinking outside the box for two seconds and wonder why else a genetically female body was in a male coffin, the ‘researchers’ blatantly disregard the rest of their research and decided to call it a screw up. Instead of, you know, admitting that maybe this mummy presented as male during his life and was therefore honorably buried as he was identified. But it would be too much of a stretch to admit that a transgender person could have existed back then.

(Sorry I can’t find any sources online and it’s been like 2 years but it stuck in my mind)

[postmodernmulticoloredcloak]

There’s a lot of bigoted historian dragging on my dash these days and it makes me happy.

[sweaterkittensahoy]

Once again, more proof that we queers have ALWAYS been here, and it’s a CHOSEN narrative to erase them.

[rain-wander-deactivated20200822]

@temple-of-rah

[medievalpoc]

I am reblogging this for the lols as well as a very accessible and engaging reminder that every historical narrative is created by human beings interpreting existing evidence and will necessarily reflect their biases, experiences, cultural norms and taboos.

Human objectivity is a myth, and until we have diversity present and speaking out in and across all disciplines, the truth will remain obscured.

[writing-prompt-s]

You’re in charge of assigning every child on Earth the monster under their bed. One child in particular has caused every monster assigned to him/her to quit. You decide to assign yourself.

[kittenwiskers]

Case: #273402 Status: Disastrous.

I stare at the file and realize I have no options, over the last 2 years every monster assigned to Charlotte Dower has quit, every last one. Her first monster; a giant goldfish-faced humanoid named Bubba, had been with her for four years, and then she wasn’t scared of him anymore. After that it was a string of different common, uncommon, and rare monsters… I even assigned a sentient sock monster to her. He came back crying! I look on my tablet, only one assignable monster left; myself. Field work has never been my cup of tea, but desperate times call for desperate measures. So at 8:03 pm, after Mrs. Gideon tucks in Charlotte and her little brother Daniel; I slither into the space beneath Charlotte’s bed. Across the room underneath Daniel’s crib is a rookie, Chico, a standard Creep kind of monster. I turn my attention to the bed above me, Charlotte is still awake but barely, I reach up over the bed and run an ice cold finger over her cheek, silence, so I do it again. “I’m not afraid of you monster!” She whispers, but her voice is shaking. I can see a small clock on the wall 8:14, a door somewhere in the house slams and there is an audible hitch of breath from above me. A few minutes go by I can hear Francis Gideon yelling at his wife. There are heavy footsteps on the stairs, and loud panting breaths, Charlotte scrambles off the bed and… She. CRAWLS. Under. The. Bed. With. Me. “Move. Over!” Charlotte hisses at me. I do. The door to the bedroom slams open and I smell the stench of human intoxicants before the man even steps inside. I know why Charlotte isn’t afraid of any of my monsters; she’s afraid of her own. Francis reaches a hand under the bed and I thrust my wrist into it, he starts to pull, I slither out. “What the…” I cut Francis’s next words off by unfolding to my full 12 foot height. Looming over the drunken man I caress my cold fingers down his face. “If you ever touch, scare, or harm my child again, I will find you, and I will do the same to you, for all eternity.” I promise to him. As Francis runs from the room he soils himself. I pull Charlotte from under the bed, tuck her back under her covers and kiss her forehead goodnight. “I’ll be back tomorrow night, sleep well darling.” Charlotte Dower is my child, I am the monster under her bed.

[bi-est-witch-of-middleearth]

WELL GODAMN, WE HAVE OURSELVES A WINNER

[gabbyzvolt25]

Holy shit I’m gonna cry that’s beautiful.

[fairlyfunctioning]

Every single cursed moment of my tumblr existence has led me here. I am whole. I am complete.