Adventurer: *steps off wagon* …Wow, so this is the place, eh? Wonder what adventures I’ll go on. Maybe make a little gold, do some delving. Help people out nothing too bi–
-5 months to 2 years later-
Thancred: Right, we best be off. Take care.
Urianger: Until next we meet.
Y'shtola: Do not be afraid to call on us.
Alphinaud: Same goes for me.
G'raha: Call me for your next adventure.
Krile: Take care, all of you.
Estinien: …bye *leaps into the stratosphere*
Tataru: Well, I better get off to work. Bye bye!
Warrior of Light: *walks over to wall and slumps* FFFFFFFFFFUCK! What the fuck was that!? There was a bird woman who threw PLANETS at me and like the Ancients, I fought both Emperors of Garlemald! Why!? WHY DID I DO THAT!? And that shit on the First? I WAS…I WAS NOT IN CONTROL AT ALL! I just wanted to make a little gil…help a lady cross the street, WHY DID ANY OF THAT HAPPEN!?
Riol: Uhh…Warrior of Light, ya alright there lad?
Warrior of Light: SHUT THE FUCK UP, RIOL! WE’RE BECOMING FARMERS! GET YOUR FUCKING SPADES!
Riol: …yeah, alright then. Sure.
-5 months to 2 years later-
Riol: Okay but by Menphina’s Glorious Tits, WHY WAS ZENOS NECRON!?
Warrior of Light: I don’t fucking know man, I stopped paying attention when it turned out Tataru was behind the assassination plot on the Meracydian Emperor’s life!
Riol: WHY WAS MASTER MATOYA THERE!?!
Warrior of Light: I. Do. Not. Know.
Riol: We were suppose to be FARMERS!
Warrior of Light: We were planting PUMPKINS!? How did investigating a seed shortage lead to THIS!?
Riol: The Hildibrand Maid Cafe was a curve ball.
Warrior of Light: HOW WAS ZENOS STILL ALIVE!? DIDNT I LEAVE HIM ON THE EDGE OF THE UNIVERSE TO DIE!?
Riol: Fuck it, were goin’ back to the First and becoming Dwarves.
Warrior of Light: I dunno man, last time I tried that there were Androids in them there mountains.
Warrior of Light: Androids! In maid outfits!
Riol: Oh gods, did they look like Hildibrand too?
Warrior of Light: NOOOOO!
Riol: We should become pirates…I bet they don’t have to deal with this shit on a daily basis. We just sail around and flip off Limsa Lominsa.
Krile: Ah, thank goodness I found you Warrior!
Warrior of Light: KRILE GET YER EYEPATCH WE’RE BECOMING PIRATES!