OKAY back to the queue grind -mod t
you can always vent here (and/or ask us not to post it), or ask us not to post an ask if you accidentally left it off anon! it is NOT a hassle and we voluntarily do this to help you
stop triggering people's moral ocd and guilt tripping people who don't farm notes for you
mod teto (he/him) - main mod all older posts without a mod tag are by me
mod kev (she/her) - everyone say thank you mod kev for her hard work
rules
not your white guilt assauger. please don't vent about how being born white makes you feel guilty in my inbox. more in FQA. tag to filter it out is #race related asks
not an internet discourse blog. don't debate in my inbox. however if you're radqueer, transrace, or don't believe in transandrophobia, you're not welcome here.
obviously no ableism. this includes people with cluster b disorders, schizophrenic disorders, and intellectual disabilities.
(FAQ below cut)
check out links if you want more comprehensive answers/resources related to the question. written by mod teto so all the 'i' refers to mod teto
Q: why aren't we allowed to send white guilt vent asks
A: because i'm a person of color and im tired of reading them. i made this blog to spread awareness about harmful guilt tripping over internet clicks, not to console white people who feel guilty because they're white or because posts about racism make them feel uncomfortable. (i promise there are resources/communities out there if you do genuinely struggle with guilt or want to learn how to support people of color better.)
Q: mod are you pro-genocide
A: no.
Q: i didn't mean to trigger people's moral OCD
A: tag it #tw reblog bait or add a disclaimer that it is not mandatory to reblog or interact with it.
Q: okay but i didn't say they would go to hell if they didn't reblog
A: the existence of "reblog if you support poc" implies a "don't reblog if you don't"
Q: are note games/"tag a moot"/"reblog if you're"/this other thing okay?
A: does your post make people feel morally worse or evil if they don't reblog it
Q: what about "send this to xyz other people if you break the chain you (xyz bad punishment)"?
A: go directly to jail. lose your net worth. do not pass go
Q: but we're raising awareness for xyz group
A: don't care. nobody is a bad person for not reblogging your post.
Q: do you even support xyz group?
A: i'm not homophobic, i'm not transphobic, i'm not racist, i'm not bigoted, i just don't care about your performative guilt tripping and shaming techniques.
this disability pride month lets be kinder to folks with moral ocd . no more “if you really care about this minority , you’ll reblog this post” , “someone will die if you don’t reblog this” , etc etc , and all other kinds of guilt tripping reblog bait . at the VERY LEAST tag your reblog bait so we can filter it out and avoid unnecessary spirals . it’s 2026 , we need to move past using guilt to get engagement .
"If I don't see each and every one of you reblogging this I swear to god" "if you aren't reblogging this you're a bad person nazi genocide lover and you hate minorities!!!"
"don't look away" is a meaningless phrase. who are you benefiting by inundating yourself with misery porn?
DO something about things you care about. Go to a protest for something you believe in, if you can. Donate money to a cause if you have it to spare. Volunteer your time to help people if you have the energy. Write a letter to your political representatives if that's something you can do. These are meaningful ways to try to make change in the world.
And then? don't feel bad about insulating yourself from horrible news. Don't make yourself look at images that make you feel sick. Don't read endless things that depress you. Because frankly it gets harder to actually do the more you doomscroll. Reading constantly about things you can't change because they're happening at a systemic level or on the other side of the world is paralyzing. It makes you less able to help where you can.
I'm not saying be willfully ignorant. I'm not saying pretend horrible things aren't happening. I'm saying don't destroy your mental health going in-depth and cycling through horror after horror on your phone. I'm saying there is no virtue in making yourself experience other people's traumas because mere awareness is not activism. you inflicting suffering on yourself is not activism.
doomscrolling is literally sapping your energy and focus away from doing anything useful to help other people. you can burn yourself out without ever lifting a finger by exposing yourself to all the bad news in the world and who does that help? no one.
Not bait but a tangentially related OCD (I think) thing with reblogs, is that if I see a post that's just one reblog away from a perfectly round number (e.g. 499), I will feel a strong urge to reblog it and make it feel "complete". It's not that big of a deal tbh, not like a distressing obsession and I don't really feed into it, I just find it interesting whenever I take note of it.
Idk if that's actually OCD or just the neurotypical idea of what OCD is tbh tho 😅 I've only just recently discovered that I have it and I'm still trying to learn, so forgive me if this is offensive
it's not offensive! this can be a mild symptom, but can also happen to neurotypicals, so i suggest doing more research on your own and figuring it out! either way, you're always welcome here whether or not you have OCD
saw one of those “tag this to 9 people or have the worst week of your life” and i know it sounds stupid but its scaring me really badly (not sure if its the ocd or the anxiety or the paranoia)i cant find those protection posts, the ones that are like “if you see this you are free from all consequences of not tagging or texting people”, so could you give me that protection please?
you're free from all consequences anon, infinity use, anytime you see reblog bait imagine the golden teto protecting you from any and all consequences
saw someone i follow reblog a "reblog if you hate nazis!" post with an "istg if i dont see everyone reblogging this" caption from a reblog and lowk wanted to bite summat cuz oh my god
the way people on tumblr think being an antifascist is as easy as performatively reblogging a random post...
god does anyone else feel really guilty whenever you tag rb bait in tthings sometimes???
like I’ll see a post. And it has important information but also has something along the lines of “reblog to save a life”
I want to spread these important things and while it’s too late for me, I don’t want others to get triggered or upset from the bait, so I tag it. But then I feel so fucking guilty because it feels accusatory even though I know it’s being said in good faith but like it’s genuinely harmful to me and others. I’m not going to not tag it but sometimes it feels a bit like I’m in the wrong for tagging it even though I logically know I’m not
(not helped by someone responding to a rb bait tag of mine with “um yeah but it’s also really useful information??” THEYRE NOT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE)
-🫧🪼
i totally understand what you're saying anon. when people add guilt triggers to useful information i feel so bad for not reblogging, because i know people might need it, yet i also feel bad for sympathizing with reblog bait
I hate when people like… trivialize the reason someone may not reblog something with the classic “reblog this even if it doesn’t fit your aesthetic” / “it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t match your aesthetic” type stuff.
It feels like they’re saying the only reason you could have to not reblog something is because you’re shallow or some shit. Idk
Yeah, it very much feels like they're attempting to prove a point without actually supporting the original cause of the post in order to make people feel guilty and reblog it, not out of interest, but purely out of guilt which is not a sustainable tactic whatsoever. Those reblog editions on posts always drive me up the wall because it isn't doing any help, instead it's driving people away and it's insensitive both to the original post and also people with moral OCD among others.
Trying not to feel guilty about my eating disorder not being good for the planet and boycotts.
Surviving shouldn’t make us feel like failures
The last sentence is exactly it. If you're in a place where you're willing and able to, then by all means, eat what you feel is healthiest and sustainable when it comes to brands to boycott/environmentally friendly products, etc. But what's healthy and sustainable for you, especially factoring in the struggles with an ed are also important. You'll never be in a space where you're able to contribute if you'd like to if you don't take care of yourself, and you should not feel guilty for eating what you have to in order to live, despite what your OCD is telling you.
just saw an ‘aesthetic’ edgy post saying “no one you know is a good person” with no tw or read more or anything. :/ Killing and maiming and whatnot
Genuinely the kind of post that sends someone with OCD into a spiral unfortunately, I've seen similar posts to these on twt and obviously from a rational perspective it's bullshit and it's just meant to be edgy but that doesn't mean it makes it any less difficult not to internalize, I get you.
someone calls out something that needs to be called about but then fucking ruins the post with an accusatory ass edit of them going "Why aren't you reblogging this" blah blah blah
Well now i'm not reblogging it and you can get fucked
It's an absolutely unnecessary edition to a post that takes away the original important message of the post itself by making it about guilt tripping instead of genuinely supporting a cause/the message of the post. It's frustrating.
is it normal to worry that maybe, without realizing it, i'm just pretending to care about female fictional characters and maybe i'm actually a horrible terrible misogynist who deserves to have everything i say be put underwater and i have to repent for my sins but then if i write more yuri and stuff in order to not be seen as a misogynist then im only doing that out of obligation and i don't actually care about women and i'm a misogynist and there's literally nothing about that and the cycle keeps repeating......or am i overthinking again
i'm just afraid somebody's going to catch me. especially in the fandom i'm in because the source material is actually pretty misogynistic and somebody's going to call me out as a terrible person because i write about the male characters too much. but then if i write about female characters more obviously i'm just doing it out of obligation. yknow?? there is literally no escape maybe i just need to die because i'm irredeemable
sorry if this is off topic i don't want to bother my friends more. i feel like they're lying when they tell me i'm a good person idk. maybe they're just doing it to make sure i don't be more of a crybaby and they actually think i'm horrible and talk about how horrible and misogynistic i am
maybe i'm the horrible fandom misogynist that everyone is talking about. also i'm apparently racist even though i'm half black (ik the posts aren't talking about me but it feels like they are. Maybe i'm a stupid crybaby who needs to kill himself because nobody fucking wants me here i'm just making everything worse)
uhhh sorry for spiraling in your inbox you don't have to post this
it's okay, you don't have to apologize for anything, and this is exactly on-topic for this blog.
as someone who reads yaoi primarily (and is ftm too), the "you're secretly a misogynist" thoughts come very often, and i can definitely relate to this. the feeling of thinking you're a fake ally or person who just makes content about minorities for tokenization is one of the most horrible feelings out there, and i'm so sorry you're experiencing it.
HOWEVER! most misogynists are so anti-women they will openly talk about their hatred for women or refusal to put them in anything. you even realizing this and reflecting on it, i think, makes you not a misogynist, but just someone who examines their biases constantly and through an open mind.
saying I need to reblog something to prove I support it is fucking stupid. fuck you if you post something and then say "reblog if you _" or if you reblog someone's post with that shit.
it really sucks when ones mutuals do it especially :(
to the anon that has sent in a few asks that they've asked not to be published about their friend group, i totally understand how you can feel being around those people. i hope it gets better for you, and i read everything in the inbox if you have updates.
for others, you can always ask for your asks not to be published
