I Love And Support You

Revamped Recovery/Positivity blog!

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

you can still be a selfless, kind, generous person and also have boundaries and say no to things

[stuckinapril]

[gentleaffirmations]

Even if you were a difficult child, you didn't deserve to be hurt.

[gentleaffirmations]

I hope this message reaches all the neurodiverse and disabled people who were made to feel like their abuse was justified because they had "behaviors".

While this message is true for every child, you are who I had in mind when I wrote it.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

one day, you will find yourself being loved by entirely new people and wonder why you were ever worried you’d never find them

[queerspacepunk]

not to be all "these two words will change your life" or whatever, but I promise you, programming in "good catch!" as your response to people correcting you/pointing out errors or whatever removes so much friction from interactions, and comes with a delightful happy meal toy of "not hating yourself so much for making mistakes"

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

one day, you will find yourself being loved by entirely new people and wonder why you were ever worried you’d never find them

[kosmogrl]

[jkl-fff]

No, seriously, do NOT.

Feeling dirty and grimy for extended periods of time is extremely draining on the mental well-being of humans. Psychological studies prove it is detrimental to our self-esteem and contentment. And no wonder; we are animals--homo sapiens, a kind of ape--that instinctively places high importance on personal grooming. Like monkeys and cats and birds in a zoo, one of the best ways to make us feel sad ... is to make us feel gross to ourselves.

So here's an easy saying from my therapist/zookeeper:

"If you feel like you hate the world, eat something.

If you feel like the world hates you, get some sleep.

If you feel like you hate yourself, take a shower.

You will probably feel much better."

[bees-official]

Do all three at once to become the perfect life form

[grownupchangeling]

Whoa! Is this where @redgoldsparks ‘ comic comes from?

[redgoldsparks]

Yes this is the source of the text!

[kosmogrl]

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

here’s to all the things you survived quietly and privately this year

[evolvingessence]

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

Please Don’t Call

in case you want to say anything but can’t call or send it to the intended recipient, you can write it here

[helperhoopoe]

remember to cry for help without guilt-tripping. i know it feels like you’ve been abandoned and betrayed, but it’s probably not true, and it’s not okay to accuse the people around you of something they might not have done.

“i guess none of you like me” could be better phrased as “i feel unloved right now”

“but nobody cares anyway” could be better phrased as “i feel insignificant and i need reassurance”

rather than assuming others’ feelings, give them time to explain them. you’ll usually get a much better answer.

[randomslasher]

This is really important for future predictions, too. “You’re eventually going to leave me” is impossible for someone else to disprove without just sticking around forever, but no one wants to stick around when they’re being constantly accused of future abandonment. Giving someone no choice but to either stay with you forever in order to prove you wrong or leave you and prove you right is incredibly emotionally manipulative, whether you mean it to be or not.

“I get scared sometimes because I’m afraid of being alone again” is easier to address and doesn’t leave your partner(s)/friend(s) feeling as though they’re being preemptively accused of something.  

[satanfemme]

you've gotta be kind to yourself no matter what

[satanfemme]

this is twice as true in the winter

[satanfemme]

the world isn't ending and you don't need to kill yourself it's literally december. it's december. and you need to be nice to yourself.

[creekfiend]

even if your nervous system is shot to hell and you're a reactive dog on a chain all the time you can spend several years retraining your nervous system (with the help of friends to practice Disagreeing With) and one day you can reach a point where getting Disagreed With doesn't cause your whole entire bodybrain situation to implode messily. it's super great. I recommend it

[spirit-of-science]

Like with real dog training, rewards >>>> punishments, and you learn best when you are well cared for

[creekfiend]

this is why I think it is so crucial to be able to Practice Disagreeing about relatively trivial subjects with safe and trusted friends and loved ones where you both know that's what you're doing and you are both actively and continually affirming that you love each other the whole time it's like training wheels. I truly cannot recommend finding friends to Practice Disagreeing with enough.

[wholeheartedsuggestions]

get it done the weird way. do it in parts. do it “wrong”. do it “late”. do it scared. it’s just better to do it differently than everyone else rather than never do it.

[crabussy]

really really fond of being alive on planet earth. I wasn't sure about it a few years ago and I was very scared most of the time but I've come around to the idea of it all. I'm still scared sometimes but it's the kind of fear that you can't unravel from the love you feel for the world around you. I think fear and joy are the head and tail of the same beast and maybe that's okay.

[crabussy]

man, I love being alive. I didn't think I ever would, but I do. I do. I do.

[jvlianbashir]

my friend's discord server has a "proof of touch grass" channel where they post pics of them doing regular activities outdoors/in public. i think many online spaces could benefit from such a thing

[weaselle]

when i was super depressed - like struggling to eat anything barely able to get out of bed to pee depressed - my good friend asked me every day to send her a picture of me holding a leaf and a picture of a meal i was eating and it helped me significantly

(also, she was never judgey - if my meal was a single potato chip she would simply say good job eating a potato chip today <3 )

which is to say, i agree proof of touch grass is a good idea for online spaces