I am playing Final Fantasy Tactics Advance 2 again (have done like plenty of 40+ hour playthroughs, but never beat it and always ended up restarting) and I am coming to a dilemma again. And that dilemma is that there’s like no good merch or purchasable artwork for my absolute favorite class in the game. The Red Mage (specifically the Viera version). Like. It’s hard to even google it for in game sprites. Everything is just like one piece of artwork of a Viera with a staff. Which is wrong. Because red mages specifically use rapiers.
Took me a minute to find a sprite. But. I would love like a plushie or full on artwork of this job/class.
With sincere regret, I cannot make direct contact with the Elder Council as the 2nd Legion still has the lengthy task of securing Bruma and the surrounding area. May this letter find Councilor Lovidicus and the rest of you well, and may I also commend Chancellor Tharn on securing a temporary truce in the Three Banners War. Whatever brief cessation of hostility it may be, know that the 2nd Legion will use every moment to restore Imperial control in Cyrodiil’s north.
Onto the matter at hand, I received a request to keep track of a former Arena Champion by the name of Bloodies-His-Face. Recently, he attended the Varen Memorial Cup held in Kvatch and then again in the Imperial City (Akatosh speed her recovery). It would please the Council to know he spent time up here in Bruma (as recent as last week), and I personally got reacquainted with the champion.
I’d known of Bloodies-His-Face (Red to his friends, a privilege I had the honour of using but will refrain otherwise to maintain formality in this report) indirectly from my time serving under Varen Aquilarios during the Colovian Revolt. He’d fought in several skirmishes alongside Varen’s personal cohort across the countryside and on the Red Ring Road. He was particularly known for his ferocity when fighting against Emperor Leovic’s army; part of a personal vendetta I later learned.
Before he became an Arena Champion, Bloodies fought in the Coronation Cup held in Leovic’s honour a decade prior. Alongside him were a cohort of Argonian servants whom Leovic had conscripted to fight. Despite his best efforts to train his egg-kin, Bloodies outlived them all and was even forced at arrowpoint by the Emperor to fight the second-last of his kin. For this, he sought revenge and joined Varen’s Rebellion.
When we disposed of Leovic in 2E 577, many of us parted ways. Since then, Bloodies recounted adventures had in Blackwood, Morrowind, and even Skyrim. He had ‘kept busy’, as he told me. The Council, of course, knows that a year later was when the dread Soulburst occurred and the Dark Anchors heralding Molag Bal’s invasion appeared. To recount for the Council: during this time, Bloodies had rallied local Imperial guard and citizenry against the initial wave of Daedra, as well as the treachery of Legion Zero.
From what I understand, Bloodies-His-Face formed the Order of the Sacred Ashes after helping many citizens escape the Imperial Isle six months later. Though a brotherhood of pauper knights initially, it serves to remind the Council that Bloodies and his comrades battled Daedra and the Worm Cult across Tamriel. They even, at times, partook in the Three Banners War. However, he insisted that his knights swear to maintain peace and justice first and foremost over any provincial claim to sovereignty. I hope this would satisfy the Council’s curiosity to his allegiance from the start.
I did not manage to learn more of what he has been up to between then and the Varen Memorial Cup, as he spent most of his time in the region at Fort Dragonclaw. Once again: my deepest apology for not compiling a more recent dossier on the Sekiryu clan, but I can at least inform the Council that it would appear Bloodies-His-Face is deeply affiliated with them. In the least, it can only be beneficial that he is of respected standing among their number as the Council knows that the Sekiryu are descended from the Akaviri who fought Reman at Pale Pass.
In summary, my brief contact with Bloodies-His-Face has informed me well of his character and alliances. I can confidently report to the Council that if we seek the services of Bloodies, his Ashen Knights, or his contacts with the Sekiryu, then it can only mean good things for the Empire. And at such a dire time when our citizenry worry for the future, we could always do with more heroes.
P.S: Bloodies wanted to convey his interest in a position as a General of the Imperial Legion that Varen promised him. I leave that proposition to your discretion.
Elyot here, Clan Gully's cannoneer. We've been tasked with doing what Clan Gully does best, exploring foreign lands and helping with whatever issues they may be facing.
Our initial home away from home is Trangelda. It's pretty rustic compared to Ivalice, but that hasn't dampened Kiya's enthuasium for acting the tourist.
I guess it'd be wise to go through the Clan roster while I'm on it.
Abelat is our Moogle fighter. He's a country boy who heard many a tale of adventure before signing up with us. While he's the smallest of the group, he definitely is strong (must be all the farm work) and is reliable. He always talks about what a knight oughta do, which is something I reckon most knights don't actively talk about every day. He's still young, though. He'll grow out of it.
Choco is Abelat's trusty Chocobo steed. He's an absolute terror in combat, but an utter goofball out of it. He sticks with Abelat pretty closely, which is well and good, I don't need him eating any of my tools.
Kiya is our Viera White Mage. From what I know, she traveled a fair amount of her life before this, and I get the feeling she joined the Clan just to have people to enjoy traveling with rather than for any financial reasons. She's deeply skilled with Magick, but can't describe it to save her life. It's all natural to her. Must be nice.
Professor Vitor is our Nou Mou Black Mage. Previously a Magick teacher at the Akademy, he is always willing to talk about Magick and all if its properties. It's hard to get a word in edgewise when he starts getting into it, though.
Syng us our Seeq Ranger. He used to be a bounty hunter and has a lot of connections from back then. He's friendly enough, but I always feel like there is something sketchy about him. He and Kiya get along really well, which I don't understand in the slightest. I know they've got history, I just don't see how they have history.
Lastly in our typical party is yours truly. Most Bangaa prefer to fight up close, but me, I've always liked a challenge and have always been too stubborn to listen to what people tell me I oughta do. My hand cannon is my pride and joy and I wouldn’t trade 'er for any other weapon.
Anyways, back on topic. Trangelda has a strange tradition of not allowing mercenaries to go out and take jobs until they complete a training quest. We had to go meet the king to be even allowed out to go take our trial. We were given a ring filled with what the king said was "Fame" and said that it would point us to our target in the dungeon. I can only imagine how k6ch Vitor would love to study this Fame, but our current job takes priority.
Our trial takes place in the Kraidia Caverns. We're going to have to be careful without the protection of a Judge. Battles tend to be a lot more deadly without them observing us. This means that unlike usual missions, the encounters we have in the dungeons here are going to be battles of attrition. I just hope we are ready.
Alligator Body Language and You, or: How To Know When An Alligator On Social Media is Being Stressed for Views
Alligators are wild animals. Despite the idiotic claims of animal abusers like Jay Brewer, they cannot be domesticated, which means they are always going to react on the same natural instincts they've had for millions of years. Habituated, yes. Tamed, yes. Trained, definitely. Crocodilians can form bonds with people- they're social and quite intelligent. They can solve problems, use tools, and they're actually quite playful. Alligators are also really good at communicating how they're feeling, but to somebody who doesn't spend much time around them, their body language can be a bit mystifying. And it doesn't help when social media influencers are saying shit like this:
That is not what a happy gator looks like.
That's a terrified, furious gator who isn't attacking because the ogre handling her has her in a chokehold. She's doing everything she can to express her displeasure, and he's lying about it because he knows his audience doesn't even know how to think critically about what he's doing. He knows that because his audience doesn't know anything about these animals, he can get away with it. This I think is why I hate him so much- he deliberately miseducates his audience. He knows what he's doing is factually inaccurate, he just doesn't care because attention means more to him than anything else in the world.
Let's change that! Here are two really important lessons for understanding alligator body language on social media.
Lesson 1: Alligators Don't Smile (in fact, most animals don't)
So what's going on in this video? Jay Brewer is aggressively choking his white alligator Coconut while scrubbing algae off of her with a toothbrush. And make no mistake, he is digging into the creature's throat while she is visibly distressed. He claims she's happy- but she's not. He is willfully misrepresenting what this animal is feeling. That's a problem, because people... well, we actually kind of suck at reading other species' body language. The reason for this is that we tend to overlay our own responses on their physical cues, and that's a problem. For example, let's look at an animal with a really similar face to ours, the chimpanzee. Check out Ama's toothy grin!
Wait, no. That's not a happy smile. That's a threat display. When a chimpanzee "smiles," it's either terrified and doing a fear grimace, or it's showing you its teeth because it intends on using them in your face.
How about a dog? Look at my smiling, happy puppy!
Oh wait no, this is a picture of Ryder when he was super overwhelmed by noise and people during a holiday party. He'd hopped up in my sister's lap to get away from stuff that was happening on the floor and was panting quite heavily. See the tension in the corners of his mouth and his eyes? A lot of the time when a dog "smiles," the smile isn't happy. It's stress! Why Animals Do The Thing has a nice writeup about that, but the point is, our body language is not the same as other species. And for reptiles, body language is wildly different.
For instance, look at these two alligators. Pretty cute, right? Look at 'em, they're posing for a Christmas card or something! How do you think they're feeling?
Well, I'll tell you how the normal one is feeling. He's annoyed! Why is he annoyed? Because the albino just rolled up, pushed another gator off the platform, and is trying to push this guy, too. I know this because I actually saw it happen. It was pretty funny, not gonna lie. He's not gaping all the way, but he was hissing- you can actually see him getting annoyed in the sequence I took right before this shot. Look at him in this first shot here- he's just relaxing, and you can see he isn't gaping even a little bit.
By the end, he's expressing displeasure, but not enough to actually do anything about it. He's annoyed, but he's comfy and that's where one of the best basking areas is, so he'll put up with it.
Reptiles open their mouths wide for a lot of reasons, but never because they are actively enjoying a sensation. Unless they're eating. No reptile smiles- they can't. They don't even have moveable lips. If a reptile is gaping, it's doing so because:
It is doing a threat display.
It is making certain vocalizations, all of which are threats. Alligators are one of the rare reptiles that do regularly vocalize, but most of their calls aren't made with a wide open mouth.
It is about to bite something delicious or somebody stupid. Check out this video- virtually all of the gaping here is anticipatory because these trained gators know darn well that the bowl is full of delicious snacks. (I have some issues with Florida's Wildest, but the man knows how to train a gator AND he is honest about explaining what they're doing and why, and all of his animals are healthy and well-cared for, and he doesn't put the public or his staff at risk- just himself.)
It's too hot and it has opened its mouth to vent some of that heat and thermoregulate. This is the main reason why alligators will often have their mouths part of the way open, but sometimes they'll open all the way for thermoregulation. This is what a thermoregulatory gape looks like- usually it's not all the way open, kinda more like < rather than V, but you can't say that 100% of the time. Additionally, a thermoregulatory gape... typically happens when it's hot out. If they're inside, maybe they've been under their basking light for too long. Heat's the dominant factor, is what I'm getting at.
There is another reason that a captive crocodilian might be gaping, and that's because it's doing so on command. Some places have their gators trained to gape on cue, like St. Augustine Alligator Farm and other good zoos. They have the animals do this in presentations that are genuinely educational. They ask the animals to open their mouths so that they can show off their teeth and demonstrate how their tongues seal off the back of their mouth. They'll also do it as part of routine healthcare, because looking at their teeth is important.
In this case, the animals aren't gaping because they're stressed, they're gaping because they know they're gonna get a piece of chicken or fish if they do it. And what's more, they're doing it on cue. They have a specific command or signal that tells them to open wide. It's not an instinctive response to a situation. It's trained. If the animal provides the behavior after a cue, the situation is much less likely to be negatively impactful.
It's also important to remember that there's a difference between a partially open mouth and a gape! As discussed above, alligators will often have their mouths a little bit open just to maintain temperature homeostasis. It helps them stay comfy, temperature-wise. These guys are all doing thermoregulatory open-mouthed behavior- that slight open and relaxed body posture is a dead giveaway. (That and it's the hottest spot in the enclosure.)
Lesson 2: A Happy Gator Is A Chill Gator
So if alligators don't smile or have facial expressions other than the :V that typically signifies distress, how else can you tell how they're feeling? One way is stillness. See, alligators subscribe to the philosophy of if it sucks... hit da bricks.
Basically, if they hate it, they'll leave. Unless, y'know, somebody has their meaty claws digging into their throat or is otherwise restraining them. (Restraint isn't always bad, btw. Sometimes the animal is going through a medical thing or needs to be restrained for their safety- which a responsible educator will explain.)
Let's look at a very similar scenario, in which a captive alligator is getting his back scrubbed.
As you can see, it's quite different. First, he's not being restrained at all. Second, look at how relaxed he is! He's just chilling there vibing! He could simply get up and leave if he wanted to, because he's not being held. Towards the end of the video, as he lifts his head, you can see that his respiratory rate is very even as his throat flutters a bit. I'm not sure what this facility is, so I can't comment on care/general ethics, but like. In this specific case, this is an alligator enjoying being scrubbed! And you can tell because he's not doing anything. A happy gator is content to be doing what they're doing.
Why Should I Listen To You?
Now, you should ask yourself, why should you listen to me? Why should you trust me, who does not own an alligator, versus Jay Brewer, who owns several?
Well, first off, there's no profit for me in telling you that what you're seeing on social media is in fact not what you're being told you're seeing. I'm not getting paid to do this. That's the thing with people who make social media content. The big names aren't doing it just for fun. They're doing it for money. Whether that's profit through partnerships or sponsorships, or getting more people to visit their facilities, or ad revenue, you can't ignore the factor of money. And this is NOT a bad thing, because it allows educators to do what they're passionate about! People deserve to be paid for the work that they do!
But the problem starts when you chase the algorithm instead of actually educating. A "smiling" alligator gets the views, and if people don't know enough to know better, it keeps getting the views. People love unconventional animal stories and they want those animals to be happy- but the inability to even know where to start with critically evaluating these posts really hinders the ability to spread real information. Like, this post will probably get a couple hundred notes, but that video of Coconut being scrubbed had almost 400,000 likes when I took that screenshot. Think about how many eyeballs that's reached by now. What I'm saying here is that it's just... really important to think critically about who you're getting your information from. What do dissenters say in the comments? What do other professionals say? You won't find a single herpetologist that has anything good to say about Prehistoric Pets, I can tell you that right now.
Another reason you can trust me is that my sources are not "just trust me bro," or "years of experience pretending my pet shop where animals come to die is a real zoo." Instead, here are my primary sources for my information on alligator behavior:
Dragon Songs: Love and Adventure among Crocodiles, Alligators, and Other Dinosaur Relations- Vladimir Dinets
The Secret Social Lives of Reptiles- J. Sean Doody, Vladimir Dinets, Gordon M. Burghardt
Social Behavior Deficiencies in Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Z Walsh, H Olson, M Clendening, A Rycyk
Social Displays of the American Alligator (Alligator mississippiensis)- Kent Vliet
Social Signals and Behaviors of Adult Alligators and Crocodiles- Leslie Garrick, Jeffery Lang
Never smile at a crocodile: Gaping behaviour in the Nile crocodile at Ndumo Game Reserve, South Africa- Cormac Price, Mohamed Ezat, Céline Hanzen, Colleen Downs (this one's Nile crocs, not American alligators, but it's really useful for modeling an understanding of gape behaviors and proximity)
Thermoregulatory Behavior of Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Cheryl S. Asa, Gary D. London, Ronald R. Goellner, Norman Haskell, Glenn Roberts, Crispen Wilson
Unprovoked Mouth Gaping Behavior in Extant Crocodylia- Noah J. Carl, Heather A. Stewart, Jenny S. Paul
Thank you for reading! Here's a very happy wild alligator from Sanibel for your trouble.
My kobold character ported over to Pathfinder 2e for the Kingmaker module. Since it takes place in the world of Pathfinder, I heavily modified his backstory.
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Born in the frigid Tusk mountains, Mukluk spent most of early years learning the ways of hunting and raiding to contribute to his tribe's survival.
He is a married man and has seven children with his beautiful kobold wife, all of whom he will brag about at length.
He had resigned himself to having to deal with the frost and cold for the rest of his life until a severely heavy winter caused most of the Tusk mountains to freeze over. Hunting grew scarce, as did caravans to plunder. Mukluk volunteered himself to go hunting in the cold to try to get some food.
It was a death sentence for a non-frost-dragonblooded kobold such as himself, but it would free up some supplies for the rest of his tribe to eat, so he trudged out into the frozen wastes.
He lasted for a full day before the frost sapped his stamina. He collapsed in a snowbank and felt the chill of death wrap around him.
Until he opened his eyes in the warmth of a trapper's camp. The trapper was a follower of Erastil, deity of hunters and of family bonds, and has felt a draw to where the little kobold lay among the ice. The trapper provided a huge bundle of food for Mukluk and his tribe, and told the Kobold that he heard of a land grab opening up where the plot of Kingmaker begins.
Mukluk sets off now alone, leaving his family in his tribe's care as he seeks to claim warmer lands in this new frontier for his less-cold-inclined kith and kin.
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Lol, guess who can't draw bows very well?
Rangers play a lot differently in PF2e, almost supporting the party in killing things rather than being apex hunters themselves.
Multiattacks are the big draw, but I decided for precision since it means I don't have to spend all three actions attacking to feel like I'm using my fighting style to it's full potential.
