⚠️ this is a blanket warning, this blog has nsfw, dead dove, yumeshipping, degrees of lewdity (game), harry potter, etc etc
i support trans rights, please leave if you are a terf.
also this is a sideblog so you will get likes and follows from my main
heres what i currently mainly post:
harry potter meta
degrees of lewdity
i am an 一设多梦 (one sona multiple characters) yumejo, i will ship myself with any and all characters i like, i am an x reader ooc headcanon apologist (not that i ignore canon, i just sometimes make an exception when things are ooc. two cakes and all)
i have multiple developed sonas for harry potter, degrees of lewdity (ocs also featured!), danganronpa, identity v, nezha, percy jackson, haikyuu, final fantasy xv, tot, hsr, genshin, um... if i remember any more ill add them.
technically i should list the characters i ship myself with but i get so embarrassed because the list just goes on forever. i have a strawpage now with the list. sort of
Tom Riddle is not unemotional. He is fucking ruled by them.
Color me a skeptic when I come across depictions of Tom as this stoic, stone-cold ice prince of Slytherin.
That was what he tried to project himself as, but at his core, Tom Marvolo Riddle is like a ripe fruit, almost about to burst with pent-up emotions.
I fully endorse the headcanon that deep down, Tom takes after the Gaunts more than the Riddles.
He did a grand job aping their distinguished disposition and glacial aura (his aristocratic looks helped too), but scratch the surface, and he's a Gaunt, a slave to his passions.
Apathy is not his Achilles heel. Avarice and arrogance are.
He's not immune to emotions. On the contrary, he's at their mercy. He's not the type to hide his emotions for long. At the first opportunity, he will make sure the world knows about his feelings, whether it wants to or not. Have you seen him monologue his entire life story and unresolved daddy and mummy issues to his prophesied enemy?
There’s nothing measured, controlled, or austere in my Tom.
He is prone to excess. Just as his Gaunt forefathers thoughtlessly squandered their immense wealth, he too wasted his brilliance, his genius, and his remarkable talent and shredded his soul to pieces in the pursuit of immortality.
Far from being unsusceptible to desire, he wanted so much and got so greedy that he ultimately orchestrated his own destruction.
"I'm Gwylan." He reaches forward, lifts your hand, and shakes it in both his own. "Pleased to meet you. I sell—" He pauses. "My grandfather sells—" Another pause. "I sell clothes and knick-knacks here. Things you won't find in normal shops. Even I don't know what I have in stock!"
So uh, I got distracted and got too invested
Gwylan has become a favorite, on par with Sydney so I'll probably draw a bunch of art for them both. I made a spread for the The Shopkeeper Gwylan, later on I wanna make a spread for Gwylan the curious for the more intimate scenes.
But anyways I had so much fun designing Gwylan based on the little details we're given about them and agreed upon consensus of their appearance, of course I put my own spin on it. I hope the design fits while being unique enough.
Below is a speed-paint of this artwork with a song I found very fitting for the fox.
synopsis: his love starts with a single petal — now, flowers bloom in his lungs, growing faster with every unanswered feeling; or: Lohen has always been good at hiding secrets, until they start choking him alive
before you read: Hanahaki disease, lohen x gn!reader, medic reader, mentions of blood (but not gorey), implied character death, spoilers for Lohen's SQ, tried my best to grasp his character but may be ooc in some parts
wc: 1.3k
Weak. Powerless. Mortal.
It is what echoes in his mind when he looks at you, kneeled so diligently before his bloodied figure as your fingers work to wrap gauze around his injuries. Something imperceptible blooms in his chest as you touch him, your warmth thawing the icy walls around his heart.
“Hang on, alright?” you murmur soothingly by his side, warm breath fanning across his skin. “Just a few more minutes, I know you can do it.”
Your words are sweet, yet you make him feel awful; weak and powerless and mortal with your ministrations. Lohen can't bring himself to refuse when you gently push him against the cushions, nodding toward the cup of warm apple cider you’ve made especially for him. “Drink up,” you say. “I promise it’ll make you feel better. I don’t like seeing you hurt.”
Your words pierce into his heart but in a good way, one that makes him feel warm and fuzzy and pleasant. It’s not something he’s felt ever since he was a child, and even then, the mundane lifestyle of a bow maker had already numbed his heart. So perhaps this is the only time he’s ever felt such warmness spreading through his veins. It’s only ever with you — you’re so positive and radiant and full of joy. He doesn’t know why you stick to someone with the likes of him.
Even with the self-deprecating thoughts that echo through his mind, they can’t seem to block out the one thing his heart knows for sure: he’s in love with you.
Lohen hates himself for it.
Attachment was not something he ever wanted to feel again, not after Adorno had passed away. It had made him feel weak as death cruelly snatched Adorno from his arms, knowing there was nothing he could do to save the man who had once saved him — not even the most refined serum drawn from a devolved angel’s flesh. Yet an attachment to you had somehow wormed its way into his heart. It was as if Celestia was taunting him — here’s someone else you can’t save when the time comes! Except this time, you’ve developed romantic feelings, and those feelings are not reciprocated!
Lohen has to snap his head away from you as he begins to feel flowers crawling up his throat. Thankfully, he’s learned to quietly cough them up whenever you’re in the room — still, it doesn’t take away from the pain as the stems scratch against his flesh, bloodied petals falling out of his mouth and into his palms.
He quickly dumps them behind the cushions, wiping the blood from his lips.
Lohen anxiously glances down at you. Luckily, you haven’t seemed to notice, too engrossed with the nasty cut on his thigh — he’s only met with your tired but reassuring smile. Even when you’re exhausted from the day’s duties, you always manage to find the time to patch up his wounds. He still remembers the various times he’s showed up unannounced at your doorstep, leaving bloody footprints across your carpet as you ushered him into your living room and rushed to grab medical supplies from the closet.
Another self-deprecating smile crawls onto his lips. For all the injuries that you heal, it seems you still cannot heal the wound in his heart.
It may seem weird, that he loves you. Contradicting, even. You are so different from him. While Lohen despises feeling so mortal, forever craving more power so he never has to feel the same helplessness he did when he was kidnapped, you are the complete opposite.
“Are you…really content with being mortal?” he had once asked, and you replied with a bright smile: “Well, flowers only bloom for a season. Even the brightest stars in the sky burn for an age. Neither lasts forever, yet we still call them beautiful, don’t we? I don’t see why we humans shouldn’t be the same.”
“But we're not flowers or stars.”
You had rolled your eyes at his smart answer, though your voice remained gentle nonetheless. “I find it strange that you call your mortality a weakness. To me, being mortal is what makes my courage possible. If nothing could be lost, would I ever be so brave? Would you ever be so brave, charging ahead of your comrades and ensuring the enemy never gets within half a meter of them?”
You — always so undeterred by others’ comments about your weakness or mortality. You never seem to care about others’ scathing words. You never seem to care about his selfishness or violence, either, always caring for him all the same.
At first, it didn’t make sense to Lohen why he would love you, out of all people. Someone who doesn’t get his thirst for power, someone who doesn’t see a future in fighting or getting physically stronger.
But now, he thinks he gets it. Your stubborn yet wise words, caring so much for him despite your differences, being the light in his darkness, as cliché as it is. Sometimes, Lohen thinks you might be able to save him from self-destruction, from feeling so weak and exposed whenever he tries getting close to someone. Maybe he’ll let himself be a little vulnerable, just for you. One day, perhaps.
“Lohen!”
Your voice snaps him out of his thoughts, and he shakes his head, eyes a bit wide.
“What?”
You huff. “You’ve been spacing out for the past minute. I’m done treating your wounds, idiot. I need you to tell me if the bandages feel too loose or tight.”
“Uh, they don’t. No, not at all,” he stammers out, unable to look you in the eyes.
You hum, regarding him for a few seconds before pushing yourself onto your feet. “Alright,” you sigh. “If you say so. But please, do take care of yourself. I’ve made you some northern smoked chicken, it’s on the table. Don’t worry, it’s spicy — I know what you like. And do drink that apple cider, I didn’t make it for nothing.”
Lohen can only nod, a little dazed as he glances down at his bandaged wounds. You’ve done an amazing job, as always. It pains him that he cannot seem to get those words of gratitude out of his throat.
“I’ll be leaving, then,” you say, giving him a small smile. “Find me if you need anything, okay?”
Lohen tries to nod again, but suddenly, a wave of nausea hits him. He feels an overwhelming buildup of flowers in his lungs, and his chest tightens painfully.
“Y-yeah-” he rasps, breathing getting shorter and shorter. Lohen puts on a pained smile for you, praying that you’ll leave before you must witness the disgusting sight of him vomiting flowers. Luckily, you don’t seem to notice yet again, probably too exhausted from keeping him company. You smile back, opening the door to leave.
The moment your figure disappears, everything comes crashing down.
Lohen’s stomach twists. He lurches forward, one hand catching himself against the cold planks before he can collapse completely. The other presses uselessly against his abdomen, fingers curling into the fabric of his uniform as a violent cough tears through him.
Petals spill from between his lips, pale against the dark floor. Under different circumstances, he’s sure you would’ve loved them. Maybe if the crimson globes scattered across the cecilia folds were instead beads of dew, he could’ve wrapped them into a beautiful bouquet for you and confessed his love.
Weak. Powerless. Mortal.
He’s too weak to love you. Too weak to put aside the selfish desire for power that claws at his chest, to escape the overwhelming feeling of insecurity and vulnerability when he attempts to bare his heart, to simply say the words I love you and end this undying pain of never knowing.
Pain had always been a proof of his existence. Whether it was the dull throb of healing wounds beneath his bandages, or the cold bite of winter air filling his lungs before battle, pain reminded him that he was very much alive — something his enemies, hollowed out by death or indifference, could no longer claim.
Lohen is nothing without pain.
But as he lays on the ground, bloodied cecilias spilling from his throat, he thinks that he is nothing without you, too.
a/n: i hope this makes sense I honestly just rambled and went with the flow while writing this with NO direction...comments are highly appreciated! hopefully he's not ooc 😣
Well we know on him, that it's his nose (even if he won't admit it), but when it comes to you...
Norton likes your thighs and belly, if that makes sense. Bigger thighs and such means you're eating well, plus then he can lay down and rest his head on you for a free pillow. He likes knowing that he's been able to provide for you that you aren't going hungry, and he likes the warmth of your lap.
Maybe he can even close his eyes and rest for a bit with no nightmares... Just this once.
Having baby’s fever and carrying mini Itha to normal Itha and holding the little guy up, and giving Ithaqua the puppy dog eyes with a simple, ambiguous “please?”
Unfortunately, all this does is leave Ithaqua confused. Please what? He doesn’t understand.. (he’s to innocent— doesn’t understand what you’re asking for..)
HAH yup, pretty much. Ithaqua is very sweet in a relationship sure, and he loves you lots, but his standards of social and relationship norms are very skewed. He would probably think you're asking him to pick up the critter, so he'd set down his weapon and grab it before looking to see if that makes you happy. If you look confused at him, well then he's also going to be confused.
The man isn't a mind reader, you'll have to tell him at some point!
hi what do you think jealous sex w norton and naib would look like 🥹
Probably a spitroast with Naib in front and Norton in the back, so they can argue with each other while fucking you silly- Naib is the more reasonable one usually, calming Norton down when his jealous tendencies act up, but... Let's just say they both can't stand when a man flirts with you when they're right there.
So obviously, they gotta remind you why you're dating THEM and not some other loser! They're not angry at you at all btw, just upset that they didn't stop such callous flirting sooner! And also blaming and bickering with each other...
Another thing fandom needs to start doing more of is projecting on tops.
There are delicious amounts of psychological distress you can inflict on that guy once you get into his head. The brainworms of forcing agency and initiative on someone who genuinely is Not Fucking Ready For It are exquisite.
To quote myself: Domtops in fics are always written to have such uncomplicated and healthy relationships to their sexualities and for my mental health I need us to collectively start giving them complexes about being some kind of monstrous predatory freak of nature instead.
Make that guy have a panic attack b/c someone in his daydream told him to stop and he kept going anyway.
New and improved! Sad Wet Dog of a top is thinking about how he wants to hurt you but doesn't want to hurt you and the contradiction is slowly and steadily making him Lose His Whole Fucking Mind.
ok personal feelings aside, one of THE most controversial aspects of the HP series is the issue of house-elves. the series doesn't take a clear stance on the moral issue (Hermione is usually shown to be "right" on moral issues but this one is a bit murkier; most of the characters adopt a "just wait for her to stop talking" mentality about it, or actively tell her she's in the wrong, and then it just sort of fizzles out). It's easily one of the story aspects that I see the most criticism of, to the point that I found myself hoping the new HBO show would cut them out entirely.
Buuuuut I just had a thought of a way that the House-Elf Problem could be fixed, and with very few tweaks to the story, too! ok come with me on this....so if I were rewriting the story from the beginning, the house-elf lore would be:
House-elves show up in big, grand manors, attracted to places of finery and history
no one quite knows where they come from but you need to maintain a certain level of grandiosity to keep them
they don't stay where they aren't needed; if there aren't a lot of messes they just leave unless they have a great fondness for the family
HOWEVER
much like the legend of Selkies, if you hide a house-elf's clothes, it's unable to leave your home
this is considered very cruel but not illegal due to wizarding society being unfair to nonhuman magical creatures
the Malfoys have hidden Dobby's clothes and until they give him some, he can't leave
the Hogwarts house-elves can still think Dobby is weird and embarrassing for talking about private house-elf business to humans (rather than because he's a freedom-loving weirdo)
Hermione internalizes this as "all house-elves are slaves, this is cruel and horrible" because whenever she sees one they're working extremely hard and they don't want to talk to her about their status/situation (because that's elf business and none of yours)
Winky can just get normal fired/banished like a servant
Crouch talking down and mistreating her is still an issue!! that's not good of him to do!!
the Order feels they have no choice but to hide Kreacher's clothes because he knows too much, they can't let him leave
Hermione initially, foolishly campaigns for SPEW to end the enslavement of all house-elves
when she actually TALKS to the Hogwarts elf staff they basically tell her, yeah no those are rare situations, please stop speaking for us, we want to be here
her angle can CHANGE to be, there should be some oversight to make sure that house-elves are only serving consensually, since it's so easy to take advantage of them
which is a decent position to take!! but could still have a lot of people rolling their eyes and refusing to help because I Don't Think It's That Much Of An Issue
I think in general this would be a more nuanced take while still pretty much having every single story beat able to be preserved? Thoughts?
just a fun little exercise where i try to imagine how the various Horcrux versions of Tom might differ based on what age they were when placed in the item and the item itself. the last part's relevant because he got the Cup and Locket at the same time (from killing Hepzibah Smith) and it would just be more interesting if they were different because the inherent magical properties of the item affected them somehow, so here we go!
1. Diary
made when he was 16, in his 5th year, using Myrtle's death. this one has the least to remark upon not only because we already see plenty of him in canon, but because the diary itself is a mundane Muggle object. so, all in all, just regular 16-year-old Tom.
though, it being his first Horcrux does bring up some questions. see, i had this thought... according to hollowed-theory-hall's theory on how to make a Horcrux:
The split-off soul should, on its own, try to search for life and a body to be bound to. If it doesn't, coax it out yourself and bind it to the Horcrux with the spirit you made in step 1.
and there's an oath at the end to tie the soul, spirit (from the corpse—Myrtle, in this case), and body (diary) together because it's probably still unstable.
it got me thinking, if it was his first time doing it, and there's already so little info about it in the first place, perhaps it didn't go all perfectly? i mean, he probably had to deal with being sent back to London indefinitely, and then framing Hagrid, before getting round to making the Horcrux at all; i assume it'd take some time and he, maybe, just put what he needed from Myrtle (blood) in stasis before getting round to it, and that messed with the stability, who knows! anything could go wrong. the point is i wonder if that instability is what led to the soul wanting a new body/feeling incompatible with its current one, or the ease in which it's able to leave.
2. Ring
made when he was still 16, in the summer after 5th year, using his father's deaths. and his grandparents'.
the ring itself holds the Resurrection Stone, and it is originally made to bring back your deceased loved ones. as in, conjure some apparitions of your memory of them.
it's very associated with longing and grief. ironic, since it was made into a Horcrux following Tom discovering the family/legacy he longed for has already shot itself in the foot... wait, there might be more narrative parallels here than i expected, i just came in here to make some fun headcanons.
so this Tom, not only is he still 16, but he's fresh off discovering he really does have no family now and he truly can only rely on himself. i wonder, would he be in mourning (or denial of it)? or just obsessed with what he's lost? maybe he feels he's lost himself too, being stuck in a ring for decades isn't really living, after all.
3. Locket
the Cup and Locket were both discovered through Hepzibah, so we don't really know which he made first, or maybe he made them at the same time. it doesn't matter, so i'll just do the Locket first:
we also know plenty of it from canon, it reads your heart and uses that information against you... well, i dunno if that's what Slytherin originally intended with it. it probably wasn't originally meant to be used like that... lockets in general are associated with sentimental memory, the way people put images of their loved ones in it... well, Locket!Tom does use Ron's loved ones against him, huh?
perhaps it was meant to be similar to the Resurrection Stone without the apparitions, just allowing you to bask in the memories. how interesting that the original Stone was used for Cadmus' romantic love, and then used by Harry to summon his family, while the Locket was originally about familial love, or well, bonds (the Gaunts), and used to torture Ron with (well yes i think Harry and Hermione are like family to him but it obviously uses romance to pit him against them). am i drawing connections where there aren't any?
i also do like the theory that Merope used the Locket to dupe Tom Riddle Sr. rather than a love potion. put a lock of her hair in, plus another charm of your own working, or maybe the Locket was always like that, where you did the bidding of whoever was "placed inside" it...
ANYWAY i suppose we can see how he might be more fixated on bonds between people than, say, the Cup. oh, where the Ring might use who you've lost to manipulate you, the Locket might use who you have now. different weapons for different situations, huh? (note, don't weaponise your soul containers, it may lead to the destruction of it)
4. Cup
as for the Cup, we don't know what its powers were, if it had any at all, though i think it's a popular theory that it's based off or meant to be the Holy Grail, which is said to have healing powers or immortality or infinite sustenance.
fits Hufflepuff's nature and the way the House in general is associated with the kitchens, so funnily enough this Tom got put in an object made to serve and provide for people. though either way, this isn't making Cup!Tom suddenly generous and giving, he could easily twist it his way in the same way as the Locket was originally meant to be for sentiment. hell, he might even be irritated that the object he's in is made to keep others alive, like dude, that's what he's trying to do for himself, not anyone else!!
though, while the other Horcruxes are probably all messing with their victims (if they have any) mentally, this one might mess with them physically.
5. Diadem
Tom finds the Diadem in the 10 years he spends leaving Borgin and Burke's and returning to Hogwarts for his job interview. we have really no clue when in that time frame he found the Diadem or made it into a Horcrux, so he was ambiguously in his... 30s? 40s? to be honest does his age even matter, i know some people think he wouldn't have matured much at all, though surely he's got to be less hot-headed or impulsive than he was at 16? narratively (in a story where we get to see all the different Horcrux versions, i guess) it might be more interesting for this to be made right before the job interview for a bigger gap between it and the previous, and then there's again a huge gap between current Voldemort/Nagini/Harry.
regardless, onto the Diadem's powers. again, not much known about it other than vaguely enhancing intelligence. you can take that any way you want, whether it's, i dunno, clearing your head so you can think better, helping you create a mind palace a la Sherlock, um, DiademGPT... or would it be RowenaGPT? is the Sorting Hat GodricGPT?? i'm probably using GPT wrong. i suppose you could expect Diadem!Tom to be more "intellectual" than the others, somehow? like, is this Tom more objective? less typical snakey sneaky and more bird strategising? why am i constantly talking about them in the context of manipulating a victim? well, i'm writing a fic...
6. Nagini
this one is difficult, because we don't know much of Nagini's personality. beyond being a snake who wants dinner, i guess. we're not taking Fantastic Beasts into account, we don't even know how much of that Nagini remains in the current one anyway. so this one's really up to you depending on how much humanity you think Nagini still has. i think it's implied to be very little, though, so... a Tom that's animalistic...
7. Harry
uh... this one's even more up to you on whether the soul fragment in Harry is even like... fully... coherent? he obviously doesn't truly possess Harry and yeah that last scene in King's Cross implied it's that baby with no true awareness of itself, so. also wasn't an intended Horcrux. Harry!Tom is whatever you want it to be, i don't have much more evidence.
oh and there's the fact that they've all been stuck in their containers for at least decades. who knows if they're aware of time passing. they all have cabin fever of the highest degree.