holey moley, me oh my, you're the apple of my eye.

The only way out is through.

[roarofmysilence]

I’ve been dealing with a lot regarding my kids. My oldest boy has autism and my youngest has “delays”. I feel like all I’ve been doing is making phone calls and sending messages asking for things and begging resources to talk to each other so we can get the therapies and items we need. It could be so much worse but I’m so stressed out. I’ve been having night terrors and yesterday I binge ate for the first time in forever. I need to figure out a healthy stress outlet but there is no time for hobbies.

[roarofmysilence]

Life has been good. We love our new house. Our almost 4-year old is doing amazing. He just finished up his school year and is going to 4K in the fall. The autism diagnosis is much less scary now.

The babies are growing and Orchard is progressing. He’s crawling and pulling up to stand. Next is getting him to walk! They aren’t babies anymore, either, today they are 15 months old. Flora is super smart and busy.

Work is good and my marriage is happy. I’m still losing weight. We are looking forward to summer.

[roarofmysilence]

I love being a mom.

[cardboardlife]

Is it springtime now?

[angry-comics]

[angry-comics]

i see u all have once again discovered Lake

[angry-comics]

folks have been asking what book this is from or what show or movie or interview. it is an interview i made up in my brain and not one that happened in other media. i wrote it and drew it

[roarofmysilence]

About a month ago, I made the decision to stop being so cranky. I was tired of yelling at my toddler and being passive aggressive towards my husband. My husband had started saying stuff like, “I’m so sorry, are you mad at me?” In a very anxious way. I don’t want the other adult I live with to be afraid of me. I’ve been in that position, being constantly afraid the person is mad at you, and it’s very toxic. I also don’t want my kids to grow up seeing me as an angry person. My mom was always very angry and short-tempered.

So I just stopped. I am actively trying to be nicer and not sweat the small stuff. I’m noticing that my husband is being nicer back. Not that he was mean. But he’s just warmer towards me now. My son is, too. And the nicer I am, the better they act, too. It’s like drawing more bees with honey than vinegar, I think. If you can’t ever make a person happy, you’ll stop trying. I didn’t want to cause so much damage to these relationships when I love these people so much.

[goth-queen]

[roarofmysilence]

We’ve been sleeping in our living room for over six months because we have too many kids.

I keep a vibe or two in my bedside drawer. I’m an adult, ok???

Normally our kids don’t go in my drawer but today my 3 year old pulled out my lemon-shaped silicone vibrator.

My husband texted a pic, “should he have this in his mouth?”

I can’t wait to have a bedroom again 😭

[roarofmysilence]

If my husband asks me one more time what date we are moving, I’m filing for divorce.

[roarofmysilence]

I’m officially down 47 pounds 🙌

Started 277 today 230 tomorrow the world

[roarofmysilence]

We showed our house on Saturday to four groups of people and got an offer for $15k over asking on Sunday. I’m so relieved because I was anxious we’d have two mortgage payments for a couple of months. Plus we’ll walk away with a profit of around $60,000, amazing.

We move March 24th. Then we close on the selling of our house on April 3rd.

I will be so glad to have it all done! Getting out of the house for showings and the inspection is very hard with all three kids. And cleaning is also difficult. I was up past midnight most of last week, deep cleaning grime.

Plus packing and throwing stuff out and organizing movers. And finding people to watch our kids on moving day. It’s all a lot.

[roarofmysilence]

We close on our new house on Friday and move next month.

I feel very proud and accomplished.

7 years ago, I was moving out of the house I’d purchased with my ex and technically I was homeless. I squatted in my mom’s abandoned hoarded house. I had lost everything.

Then I moved in with my husband, who owns the house where we live now.

Now I make enough money to buy a bigger house for our family so we can really start our lives.

I did this. I grew these children. I went to therapy. I got well. I took the medications. I found a great partner and nurtured our relationship. I applied for jobs. I interviewed and I got a really great job. I cut out unhealthy relationships. I stopped drinking. I stopped wishing I was dead. I saved money and budgeted. I did all of this. I’d like to thank me. I drowned for YEARS and now I’m doing it, I’m here, I made it out.

[roarofmysilence]

I’m officially 40 pounds down! From when I actually started trying to lose weight.

The day before the babies were born I was 310.

Then I had them and deflated, down to 277.

Today I am 237.6.

First goal weight is 200, and then we’ll see how I’m feeling.

Ultimate goal is to have a “mommy makeover” and remove extra skin and lift my boobs.

Thank goodness for GLP1s.

[creepymutelilbugger]

[sighinastorm]

uh, source?

[frowningfox]

Source:

[roarofmysilence]

The only notable things that happened in my life in 2016 were that I had an abortion and Trump was elected president. I don’t get the 2016 nostalgia??

[roarofmysilence]

I am not puking anymore today but I still feel terrible. I lost 4 pounds 💅

Orchard is not throwing up anymore either but he’s really tired and grumpy/sad.

What a terrible week.

[roarofmysilence]

Now it’s my turn and Orchard’s turn to be sick. We’re the last ones. Ugh.