"Uughhh...these meetings always take forever." Darrian groaned. "I know." said Ferris with a strangely happy lit to his voice. ...
Ā Ā "Uughhhā¦these meetings always take forever.ā Darrian groaned. Ā Ā "I know.ā said Ferris with a strangely happy lit to his voice. āBut at least the best part is coming up.ā Ā Ā Darrian looked over quizzically at his friend. To his surprise, Ferrisās expression matched his tone and he looked genuinely excited. Ā Ā "I didnāt know you were such a fan of the Celestial Commission reports.ā Ā Ā "Really? You arenāt?ā Ferris looked almost offended. āTheyāre great! We get to hear about all the new planets that are being considered.ā Ā Ā "Yay? Itās a bunch of pencil pushers talking about which ones will be colonized and mined and such.ā Ā Ā "Yea, but who knows what theyāll find out there!ā Ā Ā As if on cue, the old judge at the far end of the table banged his gavel several times to garner the groupās attention. Ā Ā "Alright, alright. Now before we start wrapping up, Cherryl, would you care to offer any new proposals to the counsel?ā Ā Ā Cherryl was a mousey, timid little thing a few seats away from Darrian. He saw her nervously look up at the old judge and nod a few times. Despite this, she spent a few more seconds flipping through notes and pictures on her datapad. Ā Ā "Um, y-yes. Well, if you all remember, a little while ago the surveys team identified a planet in the AlphaVirgo Quadrant.ā Ā Ā One of the survey team nodded. Ā Ā "Right. AV32784.ā he said offhandedly flipping through his own datapad. "It was heavily aquatic, if I remember correctly. Something in the range of 70% water?ā Ā Ā "Thatās right.ā Cherryl agreed. Ā Ā "Wasnāt there talk of colonization?ā Ferris asked excitedly. Ā Ā "W-wellā¦yesā¦ā Cherryl trailed off, suddenly looking disconcerted by the question. Ā Ā "They must of found something interesting.ā Ferris whispered to Darrian. Similar whispers were breaking out all around the table. Ā Ā "And is that proposal still on the table?ā the judge asked, ignoring the scattered gossip. Ā Ā "No, sir. The results from the analysis suggestā¦wellā¦quarantine.ā Ā Ā The table went dead silent. The judge looked nonplussed. Ā Ā "Quarantine?ā someone finally asked. "That planet is mostly water! We canāt just ignore a planet covered in water!ā Ā Ā Cherryl was hastily looking back and forth from her datapad and making little squeaks of despair. She was clearly trying to find an answer but was caught between the panic of being put on the spot and not knowing where to even start. Ā Ā "I must agree.ā the judge said, having regained a bit of his composure. "Why would we avoid a planet thatās 70% water?ā Ā Ā "Itās not drinkable.ā Another voice spoke up from the far end of the table. Harris, the lead of the analytics team, stood up. Ā Ā "The water is contaminated.ā he continued. āAt least, the majority of it. There are some pockets here and there, but Iād argue that only 5% of the water on the planet is even usable.ā Ā Ā "Contaminated?! With what?ā Ā Ā "Sodium chloride.ā Ā Ā In the center of the table, lights flickered on and the holographic imager gave birth to a beautiful green and blue planet that hovered just over the tableās surface. Harris motioned to the mostly blue sphere. Ā Ā "The water is so saturated that consumption is impossible. We simply canāt use it.ā Ā Ā "Damnit.ā Groaned the guy from the survey team, clearly upset at their misstep. Ā Ā "While Iām sure we all agree thatās most unfortunate,ā replied the judge, "Iām not sure why that would make the planet up for quarantine.ā Ā Ā "Thatās not all.ā Harris said, seemingly enjoying the build up. Ā Ā "Thatās right!ā Cherryl nearly shouted. Ā Ā Harris gave her a dirty look, clearly having accepted that he simply needed to explain at this point. āThereās more problems than just the water.ā Ā Ā "Like?ā Darrian asked, quickly becoming annoyed with the theatrics and still surprised at the fact that an entire planetās water source could be utterly useless. Ā Ā "Weather, for one.ā Harris replied. He tapped a few buttons and the holographic imager display boiling black clouds with bolts of energy arcing in every direction. The table erupted in frightened whispering and talking. Ā Ā "What the hell is that?ā Ā Ā "An energy storm. Coupled with heavy buffets of air currents, these storms wreak havoc across the landscape. Weāve seen them kill flora and fauna and even start fires.ā Ā Ā "This place sounds like hell.ā Ferris whispered a little too loud. Ā Ā "Oh, you think thatās bad?ā Harris chuckled. āHow about the fact that the planetās surface is unstable.ā Ā Ā "What? Are we talking tectonic tremors? That kind of thing?ā Ā Ā "Well, yes. Theyāve got those too.ā Ā Ā "Too?!ā Ā Ā "This planet has MAGMA ON ITāS SURFACE!ā Ā Ā "Wait, wait, wait.ā said the judge. "Magma, by definition, is in a planetās core. The exception is when a planet is forming.ā Ā Ā "I know! Thatās the craziest part!ā Harris was clearly getting excited. "There are these great mountains that literally explode and spray molten rock everywhere!ā Ā Ā "This is insanityā¦ā Ā Ā "Are you ready for the final ringer?ā Harris asked, looking even more excited. Ā Ā "How much worse can you make this place?!ā Ā Ā "The planetās atmosphereā¦ā Ā Ā The occupants of the table were unconsciously leaning forward now. Ā Ā "Oxygen.ā Ā Ā The table went silent for several moments as they all considered what theyād heard. Energy storms, contaminated water, exploding mountains of molten rock, and, worst of all, an oxygen atmosphere. It was like someone had taken a nightmare and made it real. Ā Ā The judge was the first person to break the silence. Ā Ā "Fine. We get it. Oxygen atmosphere alone is enough to disqualify it for colonization. Why, then, do you feel the need to propose we quarantine this barren wasteland?ā Ā Ā "Because itās not barren.ā Ā Ā "Youāre full of shit.ā Someone yelled. āNothing can live in oxygen!ā Ā Ā "Thatās the thing.ā Harris said quietly. "The planet has a full ecosystem and even a species that is playing at being space faring.ā Ā Ā "Alright. Stop.ā The judge had clearly heard enough. "If weāre talking about a new space faring race, we need to get the Galactic Consortium involved.ā Ā Ā There were a few accepting nods. Darrian couldnāt help but feel sick to his stomach. How anything could breath that poison and live was beyond him, and here Harris was telling them that somehow a species that breathed oxygen was becoming space faring? Ā Ā "Weāll schedule a secondary hearing to discuss the implications of this species.ā The judge said curtly. "Does your team have a name for them?ā Ā Ā "Nothing official. We hadnāt even realized they were there until the analysis. But it would seem that some of the creatures call themselves āhumanā, so thatās as good a name as any to start.ā ā (Hello Lovelies. Thank you again for all of your comments yesterday in the Open Discussion and I hope that you enjoyed this bit today. I personally am a huge fan of the idea of 'humans as the scary aliensā instead of the other way around and decided to play with it. I very well might do more in the future. Have a wonderful day for now, you dirty oxygen-breathers!)
















