Roown

Who said you can't sing the instrumental part?

[sandandglass]

Yuriko Kotani /  Russell Howard’s Stand Up Central

[2-face]

50% of comments on any given vegan recipe in the world: i was TERRIFIED this would be DISGUSTING and HEALTHFUL due to the fact that it did not contain any bacon. my husband was like WOMAN, WHAT ARE YOU FEEDING ME? when he saw me put something in the oven that didnt contain a whole hog but luckily it turned out edible! LOL i added 6 eggs and some milk and subbed the margarine for rendered lard so my husband wouldnt divorce me. the kids liked it too even though it wasn’t exactly like pop tarts :) 5/5

other 50% of comments on any given vegan recipe: i substituted 9 types of gluten-free flax meal for the flour. instead of the margarine i used opium and instead of the sugar i used something i found in a meteorite. added some essential oils too. really aligned my chakras 5/5

[insanewalkerx]

The first 50% sound like every omniscum on the earth.

[mesopelagic]

isnt omniscum that watch from ben 10

[insanewalkerx]

I think you’re thinking of Ben 10 Omniverse, which is basically right

I was thinking of omnivores, omniscum is a nickname vegans call “normies” but that made me laugh thank you :)

[mesopelagic]

i was making fun of you

[saiasus]

[god-samnit-blog]

whole new take on ‘servin’ the military.

[finsngils-deactivated20210213]

Where is this it’s where I’m moving

[xxxnewstitch]

España, Europe

[bracarvs-deactivated20221101]

Me crossing the Minho river as we fucking speak :

[pr1nceshawn]

How Food Looks Before It’s Harvested.

Sesame Seeds

Cranberry

Pineapple

Peanut

Cashew

Pistachio

Brussel Sprouts

Cacao

Vanilla

Saffron

Kiwi

Pomegranate

[biochromium]

exactly 1 minute ago i had absolutely no idea what the plants sesame seeds and peanuts came from look like and i am shocked and surprised

[thewhitewindywaves]

I’m taking a class in Forensic Science and one of my homework things is a simulation where you solve a murder.

I’m at a section where you look for evidence on a hackers computer.

Oh, sweet. That looks promising. Let’s click it..

oh

[thewhitewindywaves]

Update: Later in the simulation I tried to check the trash. I clicked it and

Are you fucking kidding me

cucked again.

[tastefullyoffensive]

“Not use collective punishment as it is not fair on the many people who did nothing and under the 1949 Geneva Conventions it is a war crime.”

[nu11-pointer]

Wait it’s a fucking WAR CRIME?!?! I mean that might not be 100% accurate but now I gotta know

[tlitookilakin]

holy crap, collective punishment is a war crime.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fourth_Geneva_Convention#Collective_punishments

and according to the exact legal phrasing-

No protected person may be punished for an offense he or she has not personally committed. Collective penalties and likewise all measures of intimidation or of terrorism are prohibited.

This technically counts, as students are civilians, and thus considered a “protected person”. So yes, collective classroom punishment breaks the fourth Geneva Convention, and she should be rewarded for standing up for human rights and doing her research.

[squided]

Power-move: accuse your teacher of a war crime using knowledge they supplied you with

[tom-hiddles-loki]

I don’t think they thought the description through

[saintdollyparton]

Oh I’m sure Taika did

[katana-wielding-bookworm]

I want Terry Crews and Vin Diesel to do a buddy cop movie where they are both secret nerds but they don’t want the other to know. Like Vin Diesel plays D & D on weekends and Terry likes to create epic crossover fan art. Somehow they have to work undercover at Comic Con and for what ever reason I need Daniel Radcliffe to be the villain. 

[rizaoftheowls]

I’d like to add: not a character played by Dan Radcliffe. Dan Radcliffe, appearing as himself.

[dragontatoes]

no, no wait… I want Elijah Wood to play Daniel Radcliffe.

[deathchic]

Elijah Wood plays Daniel Radcliffe and his evil sidekick is Elijah Wood played by Daniel Radcliffe

[cl-hilbert]

A Tasting Menu of Female Representation:

The Bechdel:

two or more women talking to each other about something other than a man

The Mako Mori:

at least one female character with her own narrative arc that is not about supporting a man’s story

The Sexy Lamp:

a female character that cannot be removed from the plot and replaced with a sexy lamp without destroying the story.

Chef’s Specials:

The Anti-Freeze:

no woman assaulted, injured or killed to further the story of another character.

The “Strength is Relative”:

complex women defined by solid characterization rather than a handful of underdeveloped masculine-coded stereotypes.

[priscellie]

[thisisrabbit]

Furiosa test.

[fuckyeahfeminist]

^^

[madlori]

“Ghostbusters” blows all of these tests completely out of the water.

And generates at least one that I think ought to be added:

The Pizza Night Test

Women are shown eating non-salad food and no comment is made about anyone getting fat or breaking their diet.

[rehfan]

I love everyone in this bar.

[prokopetz]

The bit in Deadpool where he accidentally leaves his bag full of guns in the car because they didn’t have the budget for any gun SFX in the final confrontation is literally the cinematic equivalent of a webcomic artist going “I blew it up because it was taking too long to draw”.

[prokopetz]

@personaqueen replied:

Is…is that actually why they did that scene?

Yep - last-minute budget cuts. They couldn’t even afford extra gun props at that point; if you watch carefully, you’ll see that the taxi scene is shot so that you only ever actually see Wade handling one particular gun, and the inside of the duffel bag is never visible. It was reportedly mostly full of socks.

[out-there-on-the-maroon]

It’s absolutely incredible that Deadpool was made at all and a successful film on top of that. They had to leak their own test footage in order to get the movie off the ground. Their marketing department was leaning into internet memes, a notoriously fickle and fast-changing enviornment. Ryan Reynolds, tied to the horrific box office bomb that was Green Lantern, was the lead. The R-rating cut down its potential profits. Its risque content meant no China release. It was put in February, traditionally a “dumping ground” for films Hollywood had no faith in. Its star was hidden behind a mask for most of the film and it had no major stars otherwise, its supporting consisted of a teenage girl, a CGI metal Russian, and a woman most famous for being in abruptly cancelled sci-fi television shows. 

Deadpool made a boatload of money. In spite of all of that, it made a boatload of money. That is a triumph and practically miraculous considering how little the studio gave them and how much the deck was stacked against them.

[pyromancerofaronons]

My favorite quote is still “It’s like the studio couldn’t afford more X-Men”

[babyanimalgifs]

I don’t know what’s funnier.. the baby elephant chasing the birds, or when he fell and ran to his mom xD

[imonlyadumpling]

Elephants are too pure for this world

[chroniclesofhal-deactivated2018]

I love the mums reaction like “I know what’s coming”

[sunflora-seeds]

there’s a copy of the declaration of independence on the bulletin board in my western civ class

today while my teacher was out of the room i stole it and put this up in its place

my teacher laughed and asked who took it but nobody told on me so i got away with it

i did it i stole the declaration of independence

[bunnyclown1975]

nic cage is proud

[swolizard]

The reason some girls wear make up..

[morebuttermorebetter]

Ive…. missed this video… i feel… replenished

[champagne-zaddy]

This refueled my energy

[yasakajinjya]

[periegesisvoid-deactivated]

very valuable document

[marshalmallow]

A cat scan

[coalitionclexa]

Probably one of my favourite things that’s happened this year is when these two girls went on the Australian version of ‘The Bachelor’ to win over a guy named Richie..

and as soon as they met on the show they instantly became friends

they both left the show and started hanging out lots

and lots

and lots

and then that friendship

turned into a relationship

:)))))

[ginnywaesley]

THIS IS SO CUTE

[sugarfreesweettooth]

[xxred-five-standing-byxx-deacti]

“Hey, look. I got the hammer. And it only took me, like, what? 10 seconds. 11 tops.”

[red-faced-wolf-deactivated20251]

The best

[ironbloodaika]

Glad he hasn’t been forgotten.

[official-katori]