No you did not!

I will block and report every empty blog. By following you agree to these terms. Queer, autistic, AvPD, anxiety, things. EU. They/them. Adulting at 38. Can be NSFW at random times. Minors DNI. Mostly nerding over stuff. Terfs can fuck right off, same goes for pro censorship antis. I try to avoid writing when angry, instead sharing angry posts from other people! Yay~ I'm sorry but I have pretty much given up on tagging, as it stops me from reblogging a lot, so this is not a safe blog in that regard.

[roskapanda]

Asks closed for a while bc I'm getting so much donation spam and I'm not gonna share any unvetted links, no matter the cause.

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[miyuliart]

Trying to figure out how to draw armour. These are some of my notes I uploaded on patreon. A lot more to come since I really want to figure this one out.

[wavezies]

big fan of strattland being a little too comfortable in each others' space and weirding everyone else out completely straight-faced

[roskapanda]

I don't know how to describe addiction to people who are NOT addicted to anything. Because even within addiction communities I see advice like "just get the mental strength to pass it, the WANT will naturally pass after 15 minutes!!" and... well, for me it doesn't. Sure, it does at some point but that is not 15 minutes from when it came to my mind. And it's also not counted in hours, it's counted in days.

And this is not only about things that are considered addictions, like alcohol and cigarettes. It also happens with pizza (for example). Yeah, you heard that right. The closest grocery store I have, the walk goes past the best local pizza place (out of the two lmao) and that is often IMPOSSIBLE to pass when I get the HUNGER. But pizza is only 13-16 euros, whereas an Alko run will be 25 euros, every single time. So it is sometimes just picking the smaller out of two evils.

...right?

Well, who knows. Today I went to Alko and not the pizza place and I'm writing this while getting slowly drunk. And saving just 10 euros feels small, doesn't it?

But consider this as something that happens about 8 to 14 times a month. Because THAT is what my addiction to alcohol looks like at it's worst. Sure, I cannot afford that level of alcoholism rn, BUT.

So yeah, I do think my uncontrolled hunger for pizza is related to my addictions and alcoholism. Because it doesn't go away in just 15 minutes or whatever.

[ivy-michaels]

We need to lay more blame for "Kids don't know how computers work" at the feet of the people responsible: Google.

Google set out about a decade ago to push their (relatively unpopular) chromebooks by supplying them below-cost to schools for students, explicitly marketing them as being easy to restrict to certain activities, and in the offing, kids have now grown up in walled gardens, on glorified tablets that are designed to monetize and restrict every movement to maximize profit for one of the biggest companies in the world.

Tech literacy didn't mysteriously vanish, it was fucking murdered for profit.

[anoraktrend]

Linux is a very good and powerful alternative.

[ivy-michaels]

[transarsonist]

reminder: you cannot Personal Choises your way out of an Intentional Structural Problem

[roskapanda]

At some point in my life I did the healthy thing and stopped trying to fulfill all the things people expected of me.

But then, at another point I went too far in that direction and I just stopped trying to fulfill any expectations, not even those I have for myself or those that would take me somewhere where I want to go.

Dunno what to do about this realization just yet, but at least I gotta start journaling again, or writing my thoughts down somewhere.

[roskapanda]

I still haven't figured out what to do about this. And tbh I had also just forgotten about it, so it's good that I took a look at some of my older posts today because this is something I need to be thinking about. And it's good to think about when I'm still not emotional at all.

[ironmaidenhead]

[queermania]

i think it’s okay if people are a little bit stupid (or oblivious) and need things spelled out for them but i also think media should stop catering to these people

[queermania]

for example if you need a story to explicitly tell you that adultery is bad otherwise you might get confused about whether or not people should cheat on their partners in real life, that’s fine. it doesn’t make you a bad or unworthy person. it does however mean that you should probably start watching nick jr instead of Ambiguous Situations: The Television Show

[puncertainty]

rocky learns human philosphy

[meyerlansky]

just. please know. that giffing scenes like that is a fucking nightmare labor of love.

to wit:

bottom's the raw capture, middle's just flat curve correction to make the footage visible, top is the final coloring with /counts seven adjustment layers to add back in Literally Anything But Yellow

every giffer i know does it out of love for the game, but for the record it's not... easy. it's not just slapping the footage in a cap grabber and posting whatever it spits out. "professional" lighting and color grading has only gotten waaay murkier and flatter in the fifteen years i've been giffing on here, so uh. don't repost gifs, please!

[infiniteeight8]

I thought the bottom was a black bar. I didn't even realize that was footage.

Everyone say thank you to your neighbourhood GIF maker! Giffers are so important to the fannish ecosystem, but to so many people the amount of work involved invisible.

[chumbie]

NOOOOO NOT DOUGLAS

[randomitemdrop]

Item: Inappropriate Douglas

[dozydawn]

[caitlikescoffee]

[the-acid-pear]

[jennserr]

[peachyblkdemonslayer]

"Born of the Broken" by Michael Aguw

[roskapanda]

Hello everynyan~

So what's been going on with me?

Nothing much. Or at least I can't remember much. Because that is something I've recently found out, my long term memory is now shot, apparently. I suddently realized that I can't remember much of March, even though it was the month I got back home from the hospital! And if you ask me about April, well... it's not as bad as March, but it's also not quite... there, if you know what I mean?

So anyways, I officially have sick leave until the end of July, but I already got my first summons from the unemployment office and I'm here just like whaaAAATtt? It's been days and I still don't know what to do. I should just call them and explain but... Somehow, calling places has been really easy ever since the brain bleed, but this one? Idk why, but it's not so easy.

I have been getting my feels back, little by little, and they've started with the negative ones, so maybe this is that. A negative task that I get anxious about, but I just can't recognize it?

Anygays, I AM trying, but it is sometimes so hard.

[sudaca-swag]

the demonization of condoms as a method by younger gens is awful because when speaking about sexual health no method is as safe, as easy and as complete as prophylactics, stop thinking about just preventing pregnancies, there's millions of things you need to be protecting against that are not reversible unlike pregnancies

[auressea]

Figuring Out How to be a Lesbian Safer Sexpert

When I started having sex with girls, there was no one cheering, especially not encouraging me to have safer sex. But over the last few year

[oplishin]

okay but chess terminology is like. you pinned your opponent's hung knight and now you can mate? oh im sure

[oplishin]

OH I'M SURE