Yuji-sensei was always dressed in one of two things. Either he was in casual sportswear with a hoodie on, or he was in his work uniform that was essentially the same thing but entirely black and made everyone assume he was a student alongside them.
While Kugisaki grouches about having such a “gross uncool” sensei, Satoru appreciates how consistently sensei decides to completely obscure his body with baggy clothes. Sure it means his fantasies of Yuji-sensei in form fitting slacks bent over a desk presenting his bubble butt never happens; but it also means that Satoru is less likely to brain himself because Yuji-sensei is stupidly hot and the six eyes just make that incredibly present.
He’s lost count of how often sensei would stretch somewhere behind Satoru and a little sliver of abs peek out and Satoru would lose track of whatever he was doing and become an idiot. He’d drop whatever he was holding, slam into poles, or in one mortifying instant had to run to a bathroom because sensei was sparring with the second years and his pecs bounced a little too much and Satoru could. Not. Stop. Staring. And it just— well he needed a new pair of pants which Kugisaki noted immediately because she's a bloodhound when it comes to being nosy and annoying. And because his classmates are assholes, he knows that they’ll take advantage of sensei’s deal with Satoru about not vaporizing them to laugh in his face for the rest of time and tell everyone else. Because Kugisaki is an annoying harpy who loudly makes her opinion known and Megumi Fushiguro is a stupid hypocritical judgemental unfun narc who would tell Tsumiki-neesan his weak sister if when she wakes up from her cursed coma. Satoru can already hear her ugly horse laughter echoing in his ears.
So excuse him for eating shit not being prepared to see sensei talking to Shoko in an unfairly form fitting pair of jeans and a cropped jacket more at home in Kugisaki’s fashion magazines than his sensei. A jacket emphasizes how tiny sensei’s waist is compared to his big meaty pecs that haunt Satoru’s dreams.
“Is it that time of the month already?” Shoko says blandly, liquor glass out the same way every other grown woman Satoru knows does this early in the morning.
Sensei’s chuckle is light.
“Yeah it is, make sure to keep an eye out on my students will you? I think Kugisaki’s about ready to find a way past limitless through sheer rage after yesterday, and I doubt Atsuya is gonna do anything if Gojo ends up with a nail through his eye.”
Satoru’s face heats up and he wants to go in and argue with sensei for his delusional belief in the others getting one over him. Megumi Fushiguro he can understand because it’s still early enough in the year for sensei to have some faith that he can be motivated in any way to actually improve his technique the way he’d need to. It took Satoru years and a fight to stop believing in that sort of equality, now he knows better.
Fushiguro would rather rot in mediocrity than grab Satoru’s hand reaching to pull him up.
Meanwhile he’s not even sure why sensei believes in Kugisaki getting past limitless. Enough so that he keeps cheering on her efforts when nothing’s been able to penetrate it before besides sensei himself, a one in a million chance that required a special rank is not something Kugisaki Nobara can reach. And yet there was a look in sensei’s eyes when he saw their spar. A condition or something that none of them can see, which, rude, seeing things is Satoru’s entire thing beyond being the strongest sorcerer ever.
“—anyway, have fun on your date, tell Hiromi- senpai I said hey.”
What does she mean by date, sensei doesn’t date! He spends nearly all his time on missions or in class! The only times he isn’t is some movie release dates and—
“Is it that time of the month already?”
Sensei’s had a girlfriend this whole time and they never knew. Satoru never knew.
It makes sense. Yuji sensei is a catch. He’s buff, strong, and has pretty hair. Even Kugisaki, through insults and gritted teeth, acknowledges Yuji sensei as a looker. Model worthy if he dressed better, which considering how good he looks in those jeans and that shirt holding on for its life against his chest, is absolutely right. Plus he’s nice and when he talks to you it’s like you’re the only person in the world, nobody is immune to his charm. Even Fushiguro is willing to drop his stupid bored brooding side character act and actually speak words instead of staring at you with his stupid dead fish stare when sensei rambles about movies that have slowly been making their way into their lives through weekly movie nights they have with the year above them.
Sensei’s nearly thirty, it would be weirder if nobody tried to shoot their shot. He’s open about his tastes, even if they sound way too much like Tsukumo (they aren’t dating, they can’t be because she’s the worst and sensei can do way better than a flake and deadbeat babysitter who laughs when she beats you at Digimon). There can’t be that much of a dearth of tall women with a big ass, especially since sensei isn’t even that tall, Fushiguro and Satoru are already taller than him. Even the clans could have women sneaking their way into his bed, because Sukuna’s vessel or not, he’s strong enough that those old farts would want that strength in their bloodline without any of that pesky responsibility for keeping a vessel alive.
Satoru’s stomach churns, acid rising like he has heartburn for some reason at the idea of Yuji sensei being taken advantage of by women for some reason. He doesn’t even know if sensei would be mad about it. It could be something that happens to all special grades. As far as Satoru knows cousin Yuta could be being courted all the time and Satoru simply hasn’t reached that age.
A chill runs up his spine before Satoru does an about face and gets ready to run and tell his classmates everything so they can spy on this Hiromi senpai, whoever she is.
You can read this, and the rest of my jjk snippets on ao3 too!
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