DeadpanSaphic

Fucked around and found out

[ihnmaimsfan123]

not that funny but it's ok

[stormsbourne]

usually when you have a stomach bug your body is like yes sir we'll get this punk out of here, 48 hours tops. then you get a cold and your body is like I dunno ... between a few hours and eleven months ... maybe a week minimum .... you gotta understand we're short staffed

[tibli]

tbf to the body, stomach bugs are easier to flush out since they are already in The System That Flushes Things Out From The Body, and that includes BOTH ends.

with a cold you gotta wait for the macrophages in your blood to start Eating Everything, and they are. not big. it takes them a while. please be more considerate of your macrophages in the future, theyre doing their best

[marlinspirkhall]

I've got to find myself more macrophage

[acesexualspock]

Now Hiring: macrophages

[daughter-of-sapph0]

immunesystem.com/careers/macrophage

[bugshark]

hi welcome to my hospiral. youre Diagnosed with Fun. ❤️😛Yay!

[pathetic-gamer]

giant redwood trees really are so cool, they just have something incredibly special going on. it's hard to describe if you haven't seen them

[pathetic-gamer]

a certain je ne sequoia, if you will

[seobot]

[pseudomantis]

the cambrian period was like 10 years ago

[toskarinarchive]

the cambrarin period was like 3 years ago

[magi-magi-tamamoland-chan]

the cambrian period is TOMORROW!!!

[rustic-roster]

................

[segamascott]

[innerchildabortionclinic]

[prthedisaster]

[slimemode]

whatever. go, my scarab

[malibuklaus]

[lil-peebo]

I used to see this image all the time in December but now literally nobody cares. We as a society have forgotten him. All he wanted was to offer us a nice treat and what did we do? We abandoned him. Hell has taken refuge in our hearts and its fires have burned to ash all warmth and love. We should be ashamed.

[dqnquality]

[bitethebullets]

the loss of the audio jack is due to puritan culture hating on penetration

[pilgrimattinkercreek1974]

Top ten vanity plates ever spotted….no question

[estrogenesis-eeveeangelion]

i dunno i feel like it's more complicated than that

[redstonedust]

everyone deserves a lifechanging lesbian experience. not a woman? simply have a lifechanging experience with a lesbian. im thinking a noble quest or hiding a body together or something.

[kaijudove]

happy make a terrible comic day!!! i haven't stopped thinking about this post since i saw it. in 2018 a common merganser was spotted with 76 (SEVENTY SIX!!!) chicks!! that's SOOOO many baby. so much success.

[xenthosss]

Heres a picture btw

[sec0ndwind]

I’m so hungry I could eat the gap between what I said and what I meant