Row

lotf focus, art requests & asks always open

[ruuminant]

Follow my twitter I post LOTF art + I am more active there...

Row / Rowan ꒱ 🕰 . sp/soc614 lefv²³¹² ┈

┄ Feel free to send asks / art requests (I encourage it) ♟️

Tag Collection

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#🗞 . 𝓐rt posts - My art.

#📰 . 𝓡amblings - General text posts.

[ruuminant]

Twt post one , twt post two

[ruuminant]

Plus this no island au art !! Follow my twitter where I'm more active...

[ruuminant]

✒ Post on twt , maybe I'll start posting on tumblr again ...

[spookedstarzz]

i always see people posting about waiting for donna tartt to write a new book but im gonna be honest if someone did to a book i'd written what has been done to the secret history in this modern world i'd never write again. not until tiktok was nuked at least

[synthesixia]

my girlfriend just came up with the marvelous idea of alex & nigel in a hogwarts au, to which i added that i could write a joke about how alex is reading a book on fantastic beasts, and nigel looks over his shoulder, and says something like, "you could be his brother" LMFAOO

[laurelwen]

The Battle of Forbie

As you may have noticed, I am not a proponent of any portmanteau names for Alex and Nigel. Call me weird, but none of them please me, so I will continue to abstain from using them.

HOWEVER

In a spirit of generosity, I have come here today to feed the Forbie enjoyers. I give you:

The actual Battle of Forbie

The Battle of Forbie, also known as the Battle of La Forbie or the Battle of Hiribya, was fought October 17, 1244 – October 18, 1244 between the allied armies (drawn from the Kingdom of Jerusalem, the crusading orders, the breakaway Ayyubids of Damascus, Homs, and Kerak) and the Egyptian army of the Ayyubid Sultan as-Salih Ayyub, reinforced with Khwarezmian mercenaries. The resulting Ayyubid victory led to the call for the Seventh Crusade and marked the collapse of Christian power in the Holy Land.

The capture of Jerusalem by the Khwarezmians in August had caused great alarm among both the Christian and the Muslim states. Al-Mansur, the Emir of Homs and an-Nasir Dawud, ruling Kerak, joined the Templars, the Hospitallers, the Teutonic Knights, the Order of Saint Lazarus, and the remaining forces of the Kingdom of Jerusalem to take the field against the Egyptian Sultanate.

The two armies met near Forbie, a small village northeast of Gaza. Over 5,000 Crusaders died. 800 prisoners were taken. Of the troops of the knightly orders, only 36 of 348 Templars, 26 of 351 Hospitallers, and 3 of 400 Teutonic Knights survived.

Hiribya (Forbie) - not appearing on this map. I highlighted Ascalon, as Forbie was nearby.

I have also taken the opportunity to highlight Sidon and Maraclea for those who aren't already familiar with the locations. It's worth reiterating that despite the way the movie uses Maraclea as a personal name to refer to the person involved, the story itself is about a lady OF Maraclea and a Templar knight or lord of Sidon.

Ever since @currentlyonstandbi speculated about it, I have solidly embraced the head canon that perhaps the original story was actually about two men, past lives of Alex and Nigel, but the story was later changed to a man and a woman due to homophobic pressure. After all, the skull symbolism of this story is reportedly part of the accusations made against the Templars for "head worship"-- the veneration of skulls as idols in violation of the precepts of the Church. The other major charges laid against the Templars? Homosexuality and sodomy.

Was any of this intended by Greg? Of course not. That man blindly stumbled through this script running on fumes from half-remembered random articles and vague conceptions gleaned from the shallow pop culture portrayals of occult societies that were plentiful at the time. But it fits together well in a way that feels satisfying and with reasonable internal consistency.

Imagine two Templar knights who fall in forbidden love while fighting in the Holy Land. The tragic death of his lover drives the other mad with grief and leads him into dark acts of desperation. Their story gives rise to a potent myth that Nigel reads 700 years later. The myth calls to them with familiarity, directs their fate, and leads them to the same tragic outcome.

(Excuse me while I sob on the floor for the next 5 hours.)

A Few Key Dates for Context:

1209 - Massacre of the Cathars at Beziers (Kill them all; God will recognize his own.)

1244 - Battle of Forbie

1307 - Downfall of the Templars, under accusations of heresy and homosexuality/sodomy.

1300s - Playing cards arrive in Europe. There is speculation that the cards were adopted from the Egyptian Mamluks by the Crusaders in the Holy Land who then brought them home to Europe.

That concludes today's unhinged lesson in the power of random Google searches and paying close attention to the history of certain tags on Tumblr. I'm still not gonna use #forbie, but I can at least enjoy the strange coincidence here.

Like Minds Masterpost

[ruuminant]

I've yet to see a post talking about just how flirty Nigel was in this scene. The way he uses the sword to caress Alex without physically touching him, slowly dragging it down his back when he turns away from Nigel.. Along with this, just the way he calls Alex "Jack" was insanely flirty, his tone is so playful during this scene it drives me crazy

[moistsnow]

Like Minds, La Pietà & Neoplatonism

I think we’ve all looked at this scene and at some point thought of how it resembled Michelangelo’s “La Pietà”.

What happens if we dive more into it?

Firstly, let’s have a look at the sculpture itself.

Premise: It’s important to note that this isn’t the only work that portrays Christ, Virgin Mary and the concept of “Pity”. There are, in fact, miscellaneous other pieces, the very firsts being sculptures known as German “Vesperbilder” (which inspired many artists). A few other examples are “The Martinengo Pietà” by Bellini, “Lamentation over the Dead Christ with Saints” by Botticelli (which however presents an “overlap” of bodies) and so on.

Back to our main focus, “La Pietà” (1498-1500) was commissioned to Michelangelo Buonarroti by the cardinal de Lagraulas with the intent of exposing it inside the Chapel of Santa Petronilla. The subject needed to be one that was notorious at the time: Virgin Mary supporting the Dead Christ. Michelangelo was capable of creating a powerful work of art, one that is reminiscent of Greek classicism.

There’s really a lot to say about this sculpture, however I’m only going to point out the most relevant parts of it.

It symbolizes the devotion and compassion of Virgin Mary for her son, her silent sorrow and in contemporary serene resignation in front of his death. Through Christ’s sacrifice is transmitted a message of redemption and hope. Mary’s left hand faces the sky, as if offering Christ’s body, being “lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world”. Christ’s mouth isn’t fully closed, seeming to still hold on the last words of forgiveness conceded to his executioners. His right arm hangs low lifeless, however the veins on it appear almost pulsating. There’s a meeting point between sacred and profane, which permits to ponder both on human life’s fragility and the hope of a divine eternity. Virgin Mary and Christ symbolize the union of life and death, reaching divine perfection together.

But he had to die. It was a necessary means to an end. What I can tell you is that the heavens were falling. The sound, oh– the sound, it was incredible. It was like the Gods were rejoicing for what was done.

Said Alex when interrogated. Nigel HAD to die, he had to be “sacrificed”. The sorrow he felt when holding Nigel’s body became acceptance and resignation to the necessity of Nigel’s death long after, when questioned.

Pray for me. Pray for yourself. We’re one now.

Were Nigel’s last words. In Christian imagery, through prayer, it is possible to reach salvation and redeem from sins. These seem almost words of forgiveness for his executioner, whom we will never really know if it was himself or Alex. It doesn’t really matter in the end, they’re one now, and they’ve united perfectly.

Virgin Mary is also depicted very young, but the reason isn’t for hedonistic purposes, instead beauty has a deeper meaning and redirects to Neoplatonism and Florentine classicism. The philosophical current of Neoplatonism influenced the Italian Renaissance and, consequently, art. Many artists of that time took inspiration from Neoplatonic principles to express philosophical concepts. Among them is, of course, Michelangelo.

Beauty, as mentioned before, has a deeper meaning if we observe it knowing what it represents for Platonism and Neoplatonism. It’s the reflection of the ideas that reside in the hyperuranium (a superior celestial reality in which ideas are tangible entities, and our world derives from it, hence it’s a “copy”). Michelangelo aimed at depicting a transcendental beauty, one that could reach this superior reality. Beauty is the only platonic idea that can be perceived through eyes and it has a connection with the Eros (the desire that drives man to truth, which, for Plato, is goodness).

Let’s also have a closer look at Neoplatonism. Briefly, it’s a doctrine that is the continuation of Platonism (as the name suggests) but at the same time it gathers different elements from different philosophies and philosophers of the past (such as Parmenides, Heraclitus, Pytaghoreans..) and unites them with other new principles. Plotinus is the maximum exponent of this current. He follows Plato’s idea of the hyperuranium and creates a metaphysical system starting from the physical world, stating that everything in the physical world is multiple, and multiplicity can’t exist without unity. Therefore, he elaborates the existence of “the One”.

The One:

is infinite (here infinity gains a positive connotation, since Greeks always viewed it negatively because of the impossibility of calculating it)

can’t contain any multiplicity

is beyond concepts, substance and lacks form

is unthinkable

The One is the first principle, from where everything derives. It is identifiable with goodness and God. The One doesn’t need the world, and the creation of it and its entities is the result of an “overabundance of being”, so a necessity, because the One can’t help but generate. This process of creation is called “emanation” and, surprisingly, can also be inverse. However, the return to the One is a path exclusive to man. Man can ascend to the One through the liberation from the body and material things, and also the dedication to art, love and philosophy. The very pinnacle of human possibilities is the “ecstasy”, a sudden moment, similar to a state of oblivion, that consents man to perceive the One, returning to it and being possessed by it.

Now, all of this was just to say that, coincidentally, Nigel’s last words were “We’re one now.”

Does this phrase have more than one meaning? They’ve united their minds, life and death, and that’s for sure. However, could it also be interpreted like a subtle hint at experiencing the One together and thus being “possessed” by it? Nigel knew he was going to free from his body through death, supposedly returning to where all souls belong.

In conclusion, to dramatize: Alex and Nigel have eternally united life and death together, profane and sacred, and are one, unthinkable, infinite principle.

Did Nigel and Alex actually come in contact with these philosophies? Well, who knows, there’s always a possibility, Neoplatonism also influenced Christianity. I just found a few connected things that I thought could be fun to analyze and share, and of course, it is always up to interpretation! I enjoyed making this and finally made good use of my philosophy classes.

[ruuminant]

I've been good at my job, but I've never been loved. What kind of life is that?

[ruuminant]

⚔️ ❝ Because I feel it all fading and I'm paling and I'm begging... ❞

❝ To drag you down with me, to kick the last nail in. ❞

Drawing without any filters :-)

[ruuminant]

I really love this specific scene of Nigel petting the dog because he looks so happy and joyful... he's such a dog person I can tell.

[ruuminant]

I hope Hannibal NBC x Like Minds isn't too niche... I wanted to draw Nigel and Alex as mizumono hannigram

[ruuminant]

"As for the world, the job, the war — I ditched them all to love you more."

[left-handed-spaghetti]

🤯 Snow angels ❄️

[ruuminant]

MIKE STOP YOU'RE GOING TO RUIN HIS MAKEUP!!!

Are you proud of yourself Michael

[august-shops]

CW: Will’s SA depiction, Lonnie’s abuse, season 5, and why it’s important from a survivor

With a couple mentions of events from the first five minutes (you’ve been warned) !!

I’ve actually been working on this analysis since before the first five minutes came out, but after seeing it, I had to drop everything to finish it. Because the EMOTIONS I FEEL RN.

I’m sure many of you have heard the theory, or analysis rather, of Will Byers experiencing SA in Stranger Things, specifically referring to two instances: when Will is found by Hopper and Joyce in the Upside Down with a tendril down his throat that ‘impregnated’ him (implied when he throws up the baby demogorgon), and when he gets possessed by the Mindflayer (after having watched the first five, the depiction of his s1 SA is even more uncanny). I want to talk about these representations (and their possible allusions to Lonnie), their significance, and what they mean for Will’s character.

Part I: Henry as the predator

Okay, let's break down Will's arc in each season in regards to these two events. His plot in s1 represents the act of violence itself, the loss of innocence that comes with it. He is taken from his home, the circumstances of which we are still not 100% sure of. A demogorgon spends a week hunting him, Will singing to try and self-soothe as he is living in hell.

In the finale, we have Hopper and Joyce finding Will, covered in vines, a tendril shoved into his throat which they must remove. At the time, it's unclear what exactly happened, but I think most of us assumed it was just the demogorgon impregnating him. We can infer this because of the epilogue of the s1 finale where we see Will go to the bathroom and throw up a slug-looking creature, which we later find out is a demogorgon.

Now, the first five minutes finally showed us the missing scene -- what happened to Will when the demogorgon finally got him?

The demogorgon drags Will from Castle Byers to the library where Vecna is revealed to be waiting for him ('at long last, we can begin'). The rest of the scene was incredibly difficult to watch as we see Vecna (AKA Henry, a human adult, not just a predator blindly acting on instinct) control the tendril. It was a man, controlling the tendril, intentionally. Forcing it into Will’s mouth, emptying something into him, and we know at least part of that is the baby demogorgon. Just watching it felt so so violating. The look of enjoyment on Vecna’s face watching it. Vecna stroking Will's face when he wakes up and starts crying/choking. The fact that the tendril is coming out of some kind of sac, and the vines around it look like veins.

It’s not just an allegory anymore.

This shot makes me feel sick. And want to cry (which I did). It is incredibly clear what this moment is actually depicting.

In s2, much of Will's initial plot revolves around PTSD from his time in the UD, being tormented by the same monster, even if it was under a guise. He experiences a series of visions where he is being chased by the Mindflayer, completely dissociating as the mental slowly becomes the physical. He is faced with Dart, the product of his assault, and doesn't tell anyone (except Mike) that he knows what it's from, and even then, he doesn't reveal that it came from him.

Will's possession by the Mindflayer is incredibly graphic, and it's depicted in such a violent and intrusive way, unlike many horror movies I've seen. The possession is not some invisible force entering the body; no, it's physical. It's particles that make up a being, prying their way into Will, tearing his mouth open. We can only see the shot from the shoulders up, but the Mindflayer (an extension of Henry based on what we know) is invading Will from every possible pathway into his body.

This shot perfectly depicts just how suffocating of an experience SA is, regardless of whether or not its depiction this way was intentional. Similarly, when Will opens up to Joyce about what happened, his line "I felt it everywhere" further fits into this narrative as a common way that many survivors describe the experience (especially CSA where it's a young person unable to more specifically describe what happened).

The doctors and Will's family believe that these visions are just mental, that is, until Will starts acting off. He insists on avoiding warm water, saying 'he likes it cold,' representing sensory flashbacks and being re-immersed in a traumatic experience. However, by the time anyone can realize that what happened to Will was not just in his head, even when they were with him as it happened, it’s too late.

After s2, there are no more specific depictions; however, the experiences continue to haunt Will. In s3, our monster takes a fleshy human-eating form, representing puberty as the party grows up. Around Will, his friends' romantic relationships and sexualities are emerging, but it doesn't feel like a carefree coming-of-age. No, it feels violent, tormenting, and disgusting in its grotesque embodiment. It's a reminder of what happened to Will. It's a reminder that he is always going to be different from his friends, not just for being gay. He's never going to be able to express himself, to fall in love, like the rest of the party is (but of course, we know this isn't true).

God and after all that we've seen (now in more detail), all he wanted to do was play his favorite childhood game. Mike Wheeler count your days (I still love him though).

Will was used by predators, then discarded, ignored, and discounted. His lack of perspective and distinct plot in s3 (besides his realization of his developing feelings for Mike) is symbolic of the way his experience has repressed him. And of course, he still has a lingering connection to Vecna, a persistent reminder of his trauma. Yet, anything he’s been through is no longer significant; he's pushed to the side because he's queer. And therefore, whatever he went through must not have been that bad, must not have been uncalled for, right?

There are fewer direct depictions of Will's SA plotline in s4 as the California gang is incredibly removed from Vecna and the UD (I'm convinced the entire point of their plot was just to show Will's feelings for Mike, because otherwise he'd be too wrapped up in the action). California seems like it could be a period of escapism as Vecna targets other people with their traumas. However, I believe we're just seeing the more subtle and long-term effects of the experience on Will, specifically, his views of himself and his queerness. Growing up in Hawkins and with Lonnie as his father already shrouded Will with internalized homophobia, I'm sure. But I believe this is furthered by his association of his queerness with his trauma, especially if his SA depictions in the UD are meant to represent Lonnie's abuse.

There was (and still is) a common narrative that boys who were victims of CSA by men would become gay (nature vs nurture being applied in a crazy way). Further, being in the kind of violated position Will was in is seen as emasculating (like homosexuality). This ties his queerness to those traumatic events (especially if the UD represents queerness and his experiences of SA occurred in that space). It makes him feel wrong, like a mistake, because his queerness makes him feel like the men who have taken advantage of him before (we'll get to Lonnie in a second).

But Mike makes him feel like he isn't a mistake. Like his queerness, his love for that boy, isn't gross or wrong or violating.

Now, as for s5, beyond the flashbacks to Will in the UD, there are serious implications for Will from his SA. The scenes from the trailer hit even harder now as Vecna strokes Will's face again, and there is such a visceral and raw terror in his eyes as he looks at Vecna. This is the man who shoved a tendril down his throat with the goal of reproduction and seemingly derived pleasure from it. This is the man who tore the Mindflayer into his body, and he felt it everywhere.

And now, he's going to make Will 'help him one last time.' This line in itself is already terrifying, but especially if you consider the two past times we've known Will has 'helped' him, it was both of these SA depictions. So, what on earth does that mean Vecna is going to make him do this time?

Part II: a metaphor for Lonnie’s abuse

Now, this is another theory many of you are probably familiar with, which is that Will was a victim of CSA from Lonnie. We know Lonnie was abusive towards his children already, and we know he insisted from a young age that Will was gay and needed to 'man up.' He was so worried about his kids being gay or not 'man' enough, projecting his own insecurities onto them. He was terrified of Will being gay because in his mind, it was a result/evidence of what he did to him (also, note the graffiti done by Steve and his friends in s1, 'Byers is a perv').

Looking back on Jonathan visiting Lonnie and Lonnie coming to the Byers’ house in s1 gives me the heebie geebies. First of all, we see Lonnie shove Jonathan against a wall, immediately displaying his physical aggression. Jonathan checks Lonnie's fucking trunk for Will. Once he arrives at the Byers' house, his and Jonathan's conversation in front of a graphic poster of a woman being SA by a tree (which Lonnie calls inappropriate) hints further at what their home dynamic was before he left. After Lonnie's arrival, the Byers' house shifts quickly -- Joyce stops believing herself, and starts thinking that she might really be crazy, that Will isn't still alive.

She briefly lets go of trying to find Will -- demonstrating how Lonnie is able to distract them from the truth, to dismiss it, to lead Joyce astray.

Lonnie’s abuse influenced his children in different ways, likely because his abuse was different between the two.

With Jonathan, he lacked boundaries, was authoritative and controlling, leading Jonathan to push back but also make… questionable decisions regarding boundaries of others (like photographing Nancy without her knowing oop). He had to be tough to stand up to Lonnie, and had to mature fast to comfort Will when things got rough.

Will, however, has some level of secretiveness. He does lie to others despite 'friends don't lie', and with Mike, he is careful to only tell him things when he’s ready to and insists he keep it between them.

I would suspect this has something to do with being forced to keep certain secrets by Lonnie. Being forced to be honest about things going on makes Will defensive and cagey. It makes him scared. This is further demonstrated by how no one knows about Will’s s2 possession even as the violation happens in front of them, because Will keeps it internalized, too scared to tell others, made to keep it a secret. He learned that violations like that are secret. That you don’t tell others.

The fact that Will is able to be honest with Mikes marks him as having been a safe person for Will, something I hope we’ll see in the miwi flashback and understand how much of his home life Mike really knew about (This makes his seeming indifference towards Will in season 3 even more heartbreaking). But considering Will was willing to let Mike in to some capacity regarding what was going on in s2, this could represent Mike knowing in some capacity what Lonnie did to Will.

I even think in s1, his time in the UD could be representing this as Will hides in Castle Byers. Jonathan built it with Will as a place for him to escape to, and I think it could be possible that Lonnie didn’t know where it was. So Will would use it to hide from him, like how he uses it to hide from the demogorgon, a predator. Remember, Jonathan says that Will is “good at hiding.”

Further, during Will's possession, when he is fully out of control of his body, I think this could very clearly represent his time while being abused by Lonnie. He lashes out at everyone (except Mike, really), leads soldiers to their deaths (a representation of making out-of-character decisions and hurting others), and yells as he denies it. Will was in denial while experiencing the abuse, dismissing it. However, he cracks and cries, "he made me do it."

This scene is heartbreaking. But it also provides them with a chance to free Will.

Further, if his SA at the hands of Vecna is also meant to mimic his abuse at the hands of Lonnie, this would tie Will's connection of his queerness to his assault more closely. Wondering if he's only gay because of what his dad did, fearing that he could turn out like him, repressing himself and taking it out on a kid, fearing that his love is somehow perverted and violating just by existing.

We know Vecna feeds off of other's trauma, and loves using it against them. So would it really be surprising if he took inspiration from Will's lived experiences in his torment of him?

Part III: Bringing it all together

Regardless of whether or not Will’s experiences with SA in the Upside Down are meant to mimic events from his real life or not, those by themselves are enough to relate Will’s experience to SA. He is physically and reproductively violated by a phallic-like object in a way that asserts Vecna's dominance and that he seemed to derive a sadistic kind of pleasure from.

Now this is so important for Will going into the final season. He has spent the entire show having his power stripped away from him, being used by predators, and hiding himself away. However, we know in s5, Will is at the center stage, with his connection to Vecna more important than ever. The truth of what Will has suffered at the hands of this monster will be revealed, no longer so cleanly covered up or brushed over. We are going to get a full play-by-play of how Vecna used Will, how he violated him, how he tormented him.

And yet, through it all, Will has remained a kind person. He has kept his pure heart, his genuine care for others, and his sensitivity. People are used to seeing characters who go through hell and toughen up because of it. But Will didn't. He got stronger, he had to adapt, he definitely repressed himself. But he never turned cold and emotionless. He stayed kind, selfless, and fiercely loyal to his loved ones. He has sat on the sidelines the past two seasons. But this is his moment.

This is Will's moment to stand up for himself, to reassert some of the autonomy he lost under Vecna. I am incredibly confident that out of everyone, it's going to have to be Will who ultimately takes down Vecna and the UD. Not just because of it making sense world and lore-wise, but also because of the larger message it sends.

Will was sexually assaulted by Vecna, abused and tormented beyond comprehension for years, and has internalized it all. For him to be able to stand up to this predator, this abuser, and renew his sense of personal power and belonging in his body, is one of the most symbolically important messages that could come from the show. And Will reconciling this trauma that he has deeply linked to a core part of his identity while having that identity reaffirmed to him -- by being shown that his love is not gross or wrong, by having that love reciprocated -- sends such a beautiful message to all survivors of SA. That their experiences do not make them less valuable, less lovable, or 'impure' in any way (because I'm sorry, Mike quite literally views Will as being bathed in golden light). That they can and do deserve kind and gentle love. That they deserve to feel empowered.

This is the kind of message that would've meant the world to me years ago in the immediate aftermath. This is a message that would still mean so much to me now. And to so many others. To anyone who has felt violated in their body, like their body will never really be their own again, disgusted with themself for just existing.

It adds more depth to Will's love for Mike and will make the reciprocation even more meaningful and crucial.

Knowing what we learned in the first five minutes especially, it appears that this depiction of SA is critical to Will's character and arc. To his whole experience of the UD in general -- a complex web relating his experience of queerness to his abuse. Will's story began with being used by the UD. And now it will end with him destroying it.

If you read this whole thing, thank you <3 this is like the most personal and important analysis I feel like I've done so thanks for reading, pookies mwah

[ruuminant]

I'm genuinely so happy that someone made a full analysis on this topic, thank you, truly. I teared up more than once while reading this, it was very well done.

I feel like this is a side of Will's story that people tend to avoid due to it being a more serious/heavy topic. Of course it's understandable and completely valid to feel uncomfortable by the topic of csa, but it's also deeply important to talk about it aswell dispite the discomfort it can bring. Vecna has always portrayed predatory behaviors — mainly shown with how he acted towards Eleven, but now with this new 5 minutes it seems much more clear to me that he is intended to be a predator.

Will has always been a character that I deeply related to, I mean in so many different aspects. To see Will be able to gain power over Vecna and to stand up to an abuser like him would be genuinely healing to see in season 5. Not all victims get a chance to stand up to their abuser. That's why Will having a win would feel so special, I so badly want to see him gain back the strength that was stripped away from him — to see him defeat Vecna in an emotional and real way. I want to see him be able to fall in love without feeling like it's something to be ashamed of, and I want to see him move on from his trauma and be happy.