I can’t believe I’m seeing topical variations of this meme in 2016

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@samilish
I can’t believe I’m seeing topical variations of this meme in 2016
... my fiance just wrote me a love note written in the dungeons and dragon's language of Draconic. I responded with a note in dwarvish calling him a twerp. We're both marrying nerds
Fierce.
This makes so much more sense.
And so after slaying the giant, the fierce warrior woman took in all of the children that the giant had orphaned by it’s vicious attacks upon the lands.
I want to read that story
@becausedragonage
I was going to be like “an AU where all Leia writes all her official dispatched he exact same way that Carrie Fisher tweets,” except I think we all know in our heart of hearts that this is in fact canon, and the first thing you learn in the Resistance is a basic fluency in emoji
One time the First Order manages to intercept a few official communiques and they’re all like “wtf is this code” while Kylo Ren is standing to the side just dying inside because MOM GOD THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING
darth vader would never write like this
they call me… 7 Knives. because that’s how many knives it takes me to cook things because I keep puttin em in the fuckin sink without thinking about it
Now my dad, on the other hand, hated Bill Clinton, because my parents were dating at this time…
hello guys!! i just felt like doing another giveaway since my last one went well! i thought you guys might enjoy some of these things!! :-)
RULES: -must be following me (i will check) -reblog this post -reblog more times for a better chance -likes do not count -no giveaway blogs -international!!! -winner chosen on may 1st!! - winner chosen completely at random
WHAT YOU WILL BE GETTING: -one kanken backpack of your choice -24 pack of copic markers -one lush bath bomb of choice -one lush face mask of choice -large, hard cover moleskine grid notebook (5 x 8.5 in) -cute washi tape -handwritten letter by me :)
EXTRA ENTRIES: -follow my instagram (@gillynotgil) and message me on tumblr your instagram -reblog multiple times
thank you so much, and good luck!!
Hatstalls, from JKR via Pottermore
Okay but the Hat was just like, “Sure kid whatever” when Harry requested against Slytherin. What kind of conversation was this?
NO NEVILLE I CAN’T DO THAT YOU HAVE THE HEART OF A LION
THE WIZARD OF OZ WILL GIVE YOU COURAGE NEVILLE
HAKUNA MATATA NEVILLE
DO NOT RECITE THE DEEP MAGIC TO ME NEVILLE I WAS THERE WHEN IT WAS WRITTEN
Okay, I’ve seen this post a couple of times & something just occurred to me.
Harry was pretty 50/50 Gryffindor/Slytherin from what I remember the hat saying (and according to the wiki blurb on hatstalls having a fairly equal split of traits from more than one house is the common cause of them) so when he asked not to be put into Slytherin the hat was fine with taking that preference into account and put him in Gryffindor. (Also the fact that the hat said he could be great and powerful in Slytherin and Harry’s response was pretty much no I don’t want that pretty clearly demonstrates non-Slytherin traits.)
On the other hand, the above doesn’t mention the hat being at all indecisive about where to put Neville. The hat wasn’t going “hmmm this is tough you’re pretty Gryffindor but you’re kind of Hufflepuff too”. It was probably more like “Yep! Gryffindor for sure!” Followed by Neville being all “No I’m totally a Hufflepuff!” and then proceeding to argue with the hat about it for almost 5 minutes. (Which when you think about it is a super Gryffindor thing to do.) By the end the hat was probably like oh my god kid you’re so Gryffindor you’re practically Godric’s heir shut up and get sorted there already!
“You’re practically Godric’s heir!”
As Neville pulls the sword of Gryffindor from the depths of the hat seven years later, the hat must have been so fucking smug. Like “oh yeah kid, this is such a Hufflepuff thing to do. Charge in with a blade and the bare basics of a plan that basically boils down to ‘I trust Harry, kill the snake.’ Helga would TOTALLY have done that. Oh wait! Did I say Helga? I MEANT GRYFFINDOR!”
“Hakuna Matata Neville”
Truth Coming Out of Her Well to Shame Mankind, 1896 by Jean-Léon Gérôme
I’ve been thinking a lot about it and this is literally the best title of anything
so I guess it was some ancient Greek who said “truth lives at the bottom of a well” and I don’t know what he meant or why it stuck, but I’ve seen a lot of 19th-century references to it (because people always love showing off how much they know about stuff)
but I like this because imagine how fucking pissed off you would be if you lived at the bottom of a well in the first place, but then you had to climb all the way out of it somehow because humans were such unbelievable assholes that you were forced to yell at them in person
“I CAME OUT OF THE WELL BECAUSE YOU NEED TO STOP”
I just spit all over my phone lol
i want people to start making Hamilton ocs like just iNVENT A FOUNDING FATHER just fUCKING MAKE UR OWN AMERICAN HISTORY self insert where u wrote part of the constitution
Hi my name is Yorkshire Philadelphia Virginia Willamette Laurens and I was born in New York (that’s how I got my name). I have short blonde hair I keep under a powdered wig and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Marie Antoinette (AN: if u don’t know who she is get da hell out of here!). I’m not related to John Laurens but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking hottie. I have pale white skin. I’m also a genius, and I drafted the entire US constitution by myself (I’m seventeen). Stupid men are trying to steal my work. I’m a girl (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love boys clothes and I always wear them. For example today I was wearing a black shirt with a matching waistcoat and black leather pants, pink stockings and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. I was walking outside the Constitutional Convention. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, which I was very happy about. A lot of stupid men stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.
This is exactly what I had in mind nice
check this out
so apparently while Padmé’s handmaidens were training in “handmaiden bootcamp”, Padmé went and joined in on the training pretending to be a handmaiden too to get to know the girls better, and then later revealed herself to actually be Queen Amidala so basically “hi i’m padmé the radar technician”
finally this post is getting the attention it deserves
today a kid said “think of anyone in your life- whether they’re a celebrity, teacher, relative, someone you admire greatly. then remember that they have all, at one point in their life, has had explosive diarrhea”
and I think that’s beautiful
chaotic neutral
IPsychic
I need a crossover fic between Psych and IZombie where Shawn and Gus are in Seattle for a churro convention or something weird like that and there’s a murder and Shawn is immediately like “Don’t worry, I got this. I’m a Psychic detective!”
And Clive is just like, “Oh, Liv is a psychic too.”
And the instant Shawn sees her he immediately says “She’s a zombie.” But he’s just joking because blurting out weird stuff is his thing. Then later on he’s like “Oh crap, Gus, she really is a zombie.”
And Gus just says “don’t play with me Shawn.”
And Shawn’s like “No she’s really a Zombie.”
Meanwhile Liv is convinced that Shawn is a Zombie because he claimed to be Psychic and- unlike Clive- actually has observational and deductive skills. And she’s partially convinced that he’s being eating little kid brains because he’s acting like, well, himself.
I need this in my life.
And it should be called IPsychic.
Adam Savage from Mythbusters has made “The Duck Bomb”
He is *SO* pleased with himself
if you are going to do historical inaccuracy, then go big. Just take it to a whole ‘nother level.
I mean like Knight’s Tale “chanting Queen at the jousting tournament ‘foxy lady’” levels of anachronism. Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters with Hansel injecting himself with insulin and Gretel wielding a multiple-shot crossbow levels of anachronism. Go for Blazing Saddles, Blackadder, Jack of All Trades, Connecticut Yankee levels of anachronism
you either have to play by the rules or throw out the book.
Go full on Xena. All of history happened at the same time. Get your legs broken by Caesar and find out Lao Tzu didn’t write that book, his wife did, and she hitting on you…all 10 years before you go meet up with Helen at Troy. Fight with Beowulf and commission Sappho within a few months of each other. Abraham and Issac? Only like 2 years before Jesus. Invent CPR and the kite during the bronze age. Watch your gal pal teach Homer how to be a better bard. Have a fucking battle of the bands in Ancient Greece. TIME IS MEANINGLESS.
Go Full On Xena
Look, I think that’s just good life advice: When in doubt, just Go Full On Xena.
We’ve bought a new house. And our new next door neighbours (two delightful gentlemen) will not stop being nice.
- bought us a seagull proof refuse bag (yes, they are actual things)
- loaned us garden tools when we didn’t have any
- invited us around for Friday night drinks so we could meet the other people on the lane
- one of them brought me a bunch of sweetpea flowers that he’d picked from his garden
- and tomorrow he’s coming to cut our hedge for us with his electric hedge trimmer thing idk, and all I have to do is hold the ladder.
Basically, I am UNSETTLED and am now having to enter into an arms race of niceness and I am already so behind oh god.
Long story short - I just baked a lemon drizzle cake, and it looks great but I can’t even eat it because MR AND MR NICE MUST RECEIVE AN OFFERING.
ABSOLUTE CRISIS I GAVE THEM THE LEMON DRIZZLE AND THEN THEY INVITED ME IN TO HAVE A SLICE AND A COFFEE WITH THEM AND GAVE ME A TOUR OF THEIR HOUSE AND LET ME HOLD THEIR PUPPY. AND THEN THEY CAME AROUND TO HELP ME BAG UP THE HEDGE CLIPPINGS. THESE MEN ARE NICENESS PROS AND I CANNOT WIN.
HELP WE HAD AN HOUR LONG POWER CUT ON THE STREET AND IN THAT TIME THE OTHER MR NICE CAME AROUND WITH MATCHES AND CANDLES ‘JUST IN CASE YOU DIDN’T HAVE ANY’. IT WAS BARELY DARK.
BASTARDS - I’M GOING TO HAVE TO HOST A DINNER PARTY AREN’T I?
The Gay Agenda, everyone.
this is fucking i n c r e d i b l e