sandwhales

this place is not a place of honor... no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here... nothing valued is here. jan Samuel

[bombsights]

and this is why baseball is the best sport (see also: these baseball sidequests)

[hal-monitor]

✨⚾️ BASEBALL YURI ⚾️✨

[lew-basnight]

White Sox giving these away to honor Pope Leo, a long-time Sox booster

I can't tell you how badly I need one of these hats

[femboy-c-cups]

[expcake]

[stoptheantisemitism]

Words to live by

[sandwhales]

seeing this tagged by tumblr jews is just.... interesting?

am i supposed to despise my 86 year old nana? should i not go to synagogue? hold hate in my heart for so many of my fellow jews?

israel is commiting daily atrocities and this is deemed acceptable and celebratory by far too many of us

the solution to this (as a jew) probably does not involve excising oneself from roughly 60% of American Jewery (if not more)

"permanent unconditional hostility" just makes me depressed, knowing the israeli flag hangs in every synagogue I've ever been to

[refractedglade]

i cant find the northernlion Receive Benediction post anywhere on tumblr so here

[gooselycharm]

SISYPHUS GETS A 9 TO 5

[spoilers for all of severance season 1. words by northernlion, brain worms by me]

[the-alpine-glow]

Mobile Task Force ‘:3’

[karvina]

variations on "feel old yet" meme:

lying (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 36 years ago

lying (undershooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 7 years ago

lying by a ridiculous amount (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 900 years ago

lying by a ridiculous amount (undershooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 15 minutes ago

real date of event no one reading was alive for: feel old yet? the great san francisco earthquake happened 118 years ago

real date of event no one reading was alive for or cares about: feel old yet? prince frederick henry died 395 years ago

event no one reading was alive for and also lying: feel old yet? the great san francisco earthquake happened 4 years ago

event that did not happen: feel old yet? brian mulroney was assassinated 48 years ago

event that did not happen and even if it did this would be a lie: feel old yet? brian mulroney was assassinated 197 years ago

real date of event on a cosmological scale: feel old yet? the sun was formed 4,600,000,000 years ago

lying on a cosmological scale (undershooting): feel old yet? the sun was formed 12 years ago

lying on a cosmological scale (overshooting): feel old yet? the first episode of spongebob aired 12,000,000,000 years ago

real date of a personal anecdote that only you know or card about: feel old yet? i made a really good stir fry 5 years ago

reversal: feel young yet? frozen 3 is coming out in 3 years

reversal on a cosmological scale: feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 8,000,000,000 years

reversal (lying about event): feel young yet? the first episode of spongebob will air in 3 years

reversal (lying about time, overshooting): feel young yet? frozen 3 is coming out in 8,000,000,000 years

reversal (lying about time, undershooting): feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 3 years

reversal (lying about time, really undershooting): feel young yet? the sun will collapse in 12 minutes

real date of a recurring event that wasn't very long ago: feel old yet? halloween was 13 days ago

lying about recurring event: feel old yet? halloween was 10,000 years ago

reversal of recurring event: feel young yet? thursday is tomorrow

reversal of personal anecdote: feel young yet? my laundry is done in 52 minutes

real(?) date of a nonspecific event: feel old yet? something happened 2 years ago

lying about the reader (undershooting): feel old yet? you were born 5 years ago

lying about the reader (overshooting): feel old yet? you were born 650 years ago

making a reasonable guess about the reader: feel old yet? you were born 22 years ago

technically telling the truth about the reader: feel old yet? you were born between 0 and 120 years ago

threatening the reader: feel young yet? you will die in 7 days

non sequitur: feel old yet? half of all chameleon species on earth live in madagascar

non sequitur (lying): feel old yet? chameleons are immune to fire

lying on several levels: feel old yet? chameleons were invented 36 years ago

self-reference: feel old yet? i started writing this post 40 minutes ago

giving up: feel old yyet?th e emmenkr,tn dbw a 8 gn m hk\

i can't finish the joke someone else come up with a punchline: feel old yet?

declarative statement: you feel old.

subversive declarative statement: time isn't even real.

reference another meme: feel old yet? yeah. this is the beach that makes you old.

reference another meme specifically about injecting non sequiturs into long posts: feel old yet? the glue that lets you walk up and down anything was invented 36 years ago

[zlo-sovs-lifeboat]

Assorted Helmets

[auckie]

[communist-hatsunemiku]

[virtualgirladvance]

You are a bug in bug hell but your spider torturer so fucking bad at their job that the devil himself has to grab you with his gay pitchfork and help them

[overseer-picard]

"Star Trek Deep Space Nine already did this in the 90's. It's not as special or original as you think." I say loudly to be heard over the din of the sportsbar where a baseball game is playing on a TV.

[niconicorose]

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

Tommy Tallarico's house is for sale

Witness the end

[niconicorose]

I guess this answers how things are going since the Hbomberguy video

[b9horpet]

I think about this post every time i have some difficulties with my linux setup (basically daily)

[girlnephew]

[noxtheox]

You really tagged this damn blazed post about IBS with #shitter?????

[coughloop]

#SHITTER

[noxtheox]

#SHITTER

[radiation]

#SHITTER

[girlnephew]

[sandwhales]

NOW THIS IS REPRESENTATION