im so silly @sarahs-smiling - Tumblr Blog

milk5

if a HUMAN drinks too much BEER they become a BLOKE. if a BLOKE drinks ROTTEN BEER they become an ORC

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evnw-deactivated20230112

Honestly? Today is Wednesday and tomorrow is Thursday ☕️💯

what-even-is-thiss

I never used to understand what “making connections” looked like but it turns out it’s standing at a party and saying “I’ve been thinking about getting into the film industry” and someone saying “Oh, Sarah works in the film industry” and Sarah yelling from accross the room “Did someone say my name?!?!?!”

what-even-is-thiss

You casually mention that you’ve been thinking about such and such and your professor overhears and is like “oh I know someone who works there. Do you want me to email them for you?” And you go “Sure.”

what-even-is-thiss

It’s the six layers of separation thing. Everyone is only so many layers away from everyone else. So if you stand in the correct rooms and say the correct things out loud once in a while eventually someone will say “Oh, I know a guy.”

what-even-is-thiss

And then eventually you turn into the guy that someone knows. I think. It’s hard to tell.

normal-horoscopes

nox-lumiere

Wait I have to google something real quick

nox-lumiere

Ok this is funny

flopy-hana

Apollo is the sun and archer god. Hou Yi is the archer lord, the beat archer, who killed the other 9 suns that existed originally.

halakhic-ho

A man goes to see his Rabbi in a panic, and he gets there and he says, “Rabbi you’ll never guess what! My son has run away to become a Christian!” And the Rabbi responds, “Well you’ll never guess what! My son has also run away to become a Christian!” So the man asks the Rabbi what to do and the Rabbi says that they should pray to G-d. So they pray and tell him of their plight and G-d replies, “You’ll never guess what!”

- An old Hasidic joke that my Dad likes to tell me

promethiae

An old Jewish lady ducks into a church one night during a sudden rain shower. The priest comes in while she’s waiting out the rain and says, “you can’t be here, we don’t allow your kind in here.”

So the lady stands up and grabs the baby jesus statue from their nativity scene and says, “come along bubbala, you heard the man, we aren’t allowed in here”

-my grandmother’s favorite joke

mevil

leatherleaves

someone reverse this video I want to tuck him back in ;-;

smute

toadschooled

This Asian common toad [Duttaphrynus melanostictus] was spotted climbing into a phone booth at the Bangkok Asiatique Night Market. Photographs by Michal Ginter

pickledpennies

he needs to make an important call

buddhabrand

maybe he’s common in asia, but, in my heart, he’s one in a million

bestviralposts

MY FUTURE CHILDREN EVERYONE! 🐶🐶🐶

credit/owner: @Sheryl / fb

sweetestpiglet

Shih tzus are precious little angel puppies, full stop.

softbutchdisaster

These are angels but I would just like to announce that I have the cutest shihtzu ever

roselalonde

you will be a person in your room and be like i need to listen to music or i will go crazy

jimhensonreject

jeb i think we just have adhd

roselalonde

mugasofer

ilovecats4ever

azurele

jester-de-punyalada

we really need to internalize "my own experiences can lead to blindspots that prevent me from recognizing something is racist even if i never intended to hurt people"

getting called racist is not a condemnation. and no one is asking white people adopt a catholic's guilt-driven mindset. its just a guideline to help u not hurt people of color.