We are a plural system writing stories for the love of writing. This post is here to make sure you can navigate your way to any story we write.
Current writers in our system: đMayday(ÎÎ), đĽSiffrin, â¨ď¸Loop
Latest project: In Stars and Time: Reunion to Remember
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In Stars and Systems: a plural ISAT AU
Updates every other Sunday at 4:00 PM EST
AO3 Link
Act 1: The Inn-cident
[1] - [2] - [3] - [4] - [5] - [6] -[7] - [8] - [9] - [10]
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(Siffrin] |Mal du Pays| +Jester+ -Flake- {The King}
Bambouche
âSif? Are you doing ok?â
Isa asks you again. You're pretty sure it's the seventh time he's asked today. You get it. Everyone knows your brain recreated their worst enemy and attacked him. Mal du Pays had the right idea of locking him up. Jester's convinced he can fix him. You called him an idiot. You called him a lot of things after that. Stupid brain. Why do you have to deal with this? Everyone hates you. You keep causing problems for them. First you were fighting against your stupid wish, now it's your own blinding brain! Sometimes you fantasize about yourself wishing to the universe to fix your broken mind and body.
{They'll grow tired of constantly fixing your problems. That's what you were thinking, wasn't it. You're correct in that mindset.}
âI'm fi⌠I'm alright, Isa. I'm a little tired is all⌠and it's a little cold.â
âOh, I'll ask Reuben for another blanket. M'dame and PĂŠtronille are nearby if you need anything else.â
Isabeau exits the trailer wagon. It was originally storage for stage props. It still is, but they made space for your bed and some medical equipment. As Mira explained it, you'll be traveling with the theater back to Dormont. There you can ask the Change god directly for help, or if that doesn't work, try Halley's insane plan. You've stopped caring if either will work. You rarely have the energy to leave your bed. Either something works and you go back to nearly killing yourself again for your family, or you die and your family hates you for giving up so easilyâŚ
Bon bon met back up with their sister, you embarrassed yourself in front of Loop and now they're avoiding you⌠What happens when Isabeau finds out about them? A less broken better version of yourself? Maybe he already knows, he's so different with you now.
You grip your covers tightly. When was the last time he called you Siffarooni?
Do Mira and Odile hate you too? They shouldn't have to constantly take care of you. You hate the idea of them all taking care of you, but you don't want them to leave you either. Just be better already! Just be better!!!!
{You aren't going to be better.}
(Shut up. I'd kill you if I had the chance. It's your fault this is happening. You should have died. You should have stayed dead when I killed you the first time!]
{I've told you already, I'm not that King, and you need to hear me when I tell you the truth. You aren't going to get better.}
You imagine stabbing this King over and over, it doesn't happen in your headspace, no matter how much you try to will it. At best you can squint and glare at him.
{This is exactly why I despise you. Perhaps some time with Flake will cool you down.}
(Excuse-
You don't let them finish as you shunt them out of the theater front and take over for yourself. It isn't pleasant. A sense of lethargy rolls over you like a cold wave.
Your plans to waste away reminiscing of your home were ended, freezing yourself in time wouldn't work either with that Blinding housemaiden. Though Siffrin's own timecraft might take over and kill you all. It's too risky⌠no, as much as you hate it, you need to live Siffrin's life. Jester was right about that, at the very least. Who knows, it might be entertaining to watch the Bright one's friends squirm trying to play nice with you.
With all the energy you can muster from this frail body, you slowly begin to worm your way out of bed. You crumple on the floor and knock over a dress rack.
âSiffrin? Is everything alright in there?â The researcher calls out.
You donât respond. You take the time to pick yourself up. You can hear Odile rushing inside. It doesn't take long for her to help you to your feet.
âWhat happened? Are you alright? Do you require Mirabelle to heal you?â
âI'm fine. Leave me be.â
She immediately retreats an inch, she's clearly hoping you didn't notice her reflexive disgust at you. You tell her to leave again. But she ignores your protests and helps you back on your feet.
âYou can simply ask for assistance if you want to move around. Here, I'll get your wheelchair.â
âExcuse me? Don't you know who I am?â You sputter in shock of her kindness.
âI can guess based on your tone and language. I don't see why it should stop me from helping you, or would you prefer I treated you exactly like the King? I mean that genuinely by the way. I know each of you has your own opinion on us and yours must be rather shaded by who you are. So if I do anything to make you uncomfortable, please let me know.â
Yes? No? What was that response?! She should be cowering or begging you to let the bright one back in control! Not this⌠this⌠honesty! It's disgusting! No, she knows! She must. Sheâs trying to confuse you. You donât like thinking about this. The idea if you ever met the actual king. Well, not youâre the actual king! ARGH, your brain is starting to hurt. You hate this.
âI donât care what you think of me, Researcher. But I'd at least appreciate it if you didn't act like you understand me.â
Ugh. That was a little too real. Not enough venom. They should be feeling awkward, not you. It just feels all. Bleg! Blinding! No! Bad! You hate everything about this!
âVery well.â Odile says matter-of-factly. âIf that's what you prefer, then I'll respect it. Though could I also ask you a few questions? Iâd like to get to know you better, and Iâm sure the others feel unsure on how to approach you.â
âIf you must.â
âWhen exactly did you form?â
You scoff. âYou don't pull your punches, Researcher. Have you ever considered how personal a question that is?â
âYou don't need to answer if you don't feel like it.â
â...I came to be during Bright one's time in the house. His memory became more shoddy as time went on, or in their case, didn't. I was the one who took those memories, the loops that would have broken them. How fitting that the being protecting him was the obstacle who caused it in the first place. Then I decided to take more. The memories of the house. He didn't need those. I hold them, and he hates me for protecting him.â
âYou protect Siffrin?â
Wait what did you say? No, that's not right. You hate him, protecting him is the last thing you want to do. No, you took those memories because⌠because they're yours to take. They're your only memories of you, the one probably being used as a fountain decoration in Dormont currently. The tragedy of a people who will never remember your home.
âNext question.â You growl.
âVery well, What are your thoughts on the others in that mind of yours?â
âThey are all annoyances. Save for the child.â
âFlake?â
âShe has done no wrongs. Merely a child I used to my own end. I hope she can be better taken care of one day.â
âOne can only hope.â
âŚ
âWhy do you trust him?â You ask.
âSiffrin? Believe me, Siffrin has lost a lot of trust with all of us. But that's not his fault. The more I study his conditions, the more I realize what kind of life they must have been living. A mountain of isolation and fear left them a wreck. But at the same time, they'll only start trusting us more if we extend that same trust. It's a process, one that they are slowly learning.â
âI don't know why you bother. If anything he shouldnât even be the one in charge of us. He is the one most likely to kill himsel-
That struck a nerve. Odile's hand is now inches from your face. You smile. The only thing stopping her from slapping you is the stagehand and the fighter, returning with the blankets Bright one requested.
âDon't do that.â The stagehand states plainly.
Odile slowly relaxed her hand and the stagehand let it go.
âApologies. Reuben, was it? I let myself go in a moment of anger. Rather unlike me.â
Want to talk about it, M'dame?â Isabeau asked in that frustratingly honest way.
What did he know? The fool could never handle a conversation like this. How dare he try to force himself into your fight. Itâs almost enough to make you try and send a rockcraft attack into his stomach again⌠but no. No, right now you need to remain calm.
âNo, Isabeau. I'm fine. I was unprepared to discuss this, but if it-
Reuben cuts her off with a shush and sits down on the bed next to you. You feel uncomfortable for this stranger to so casually approach you. Tyrant or not, you're in the body of a savior, he should at least respect it⌠oh right, he's Poterian. You admire his disrespect towards Odile.
âAre you worried Siffrin is going to hurt himself?â He asks.
Damnit, they overheard you.
Isabeau shuffles closer. âWait, Reuben. Look, there's some things you don't know about Sif. It's not really my place to-
âThey're plural right? Multiple people in one body? I know what I'm doing.â
âPlural? â Odile questions. More curious about the word itself than how Reuben knew.
âI think I have a book on it somewhere you can read. Though, someone around here will have to translate. But I've worked with⌠someone else like this recently, so I'd prefer stepping in.â
â...Alright.â Odile says. Her curiosity in his experience outweighs her apprehension to involve this stranger.
She leans against the wagon wall. You can at least feel comforted that she wonât speak against you for a while. Not much of a high ground to push back on when she was caught trying to slap you.
âCan I ask your name?â
âI am the King of Vaugarde. The one who tried and nearly succeeded to make it perfect!â
The others frown and fail at neutrality.The fact the body of their friend is shouting absolute heresy, oh their reactions are delightful. But to your dismay⌠Reuben is calm, no, contemplative.
âYeah, that makes sense. Was Siffrin the one who fought against the other you?â
You nod, unsure of where this conversation is going.
âI get it. Not exactly a pleasant thought that the person who tried to hurt you might martyr themself just to spite you, or worse, nothing to do with you.â
You⌠nod again.
âLook, I'm sure some idiot in an arm chair would say something about building trust between you and Siffrin, and taking the first step. But we both know that's a bunch of snails.â
You recall Poterian swears revolving around mollusks or something.
âYou can't trust Siffrin. Maybe that'll change, maybe it won't. Itâs probably not great to be at each other's throats your whole life. But you donât need to like each other either. No trust in your system is difficult right now⌠but you have a bunch of people in this room who don't want to see you die, so put a little faith in us. I'll keep an eye on you as much as you need. Itâs a Reuben Guarantee! Good for however long youâre still alive."
He winks at you and wiggles his fingers like heâs wowed an audience.
You want to call this man an idiot with terrible advice. Because that's what he is. But the sheer confidence he gives off makes you laugh a little⌠you hate your laugh. It doesn't sound like you, it sounds too close to Siffrin's. But you can't stop yourself as it gets louder. He's laughing with you. It's not awkward, it's⌠genuine. What a worthless insect. Laughing at his own joke! It makes you laugh even harder. Stars, you look crazy laughing at nothing funny.
He extends his hand for a shake. You can't help but extend your own.
âReuben Baker. Nice to meet you King. Hope you don't mind a friend.â
Your heart lifts a little. A friend? You⌠are you even supposed to have those? People are supposed to hate you. You're supposed to be intimidating and freak people out. They aren't supposed to like you? So is this just fake? It must be. He's siding with the researcher and tricking you into leaving!
âŚbut you really want to believe him.
Isabeau approaches you and drops the blanket over you. You're crushed by comfy sheets as he sits opposite to Reuben.
âI'm sorry, King. I⌠Well, we didn't get to talk much. You kinda sent me flying with a craft attack when we first met, and when I learned who you are⌠Well, I kind of secretly hoped you would've just disappeared or something. Crab, that sounds so bad when I say it out loud! I'm really sorry!â
Nope, that's it. Too much genuine affection. Disgusting! Someone else needs to control the body you CAN NOT be here.
âŚ
With all the energy you can muster you scurry away from the two people surrounding you. You stare at them with wide eyes.
âOh! Crab, sorry Mal.â Isabeau says, immediately backing away. âDidn't mean to scare you.â
You calm down. Isabeau is safe.
Odile looks wide eyed at Isabeau.
âHow do you do that, Isabeau? How do you just⌠know? I have to go off guess-work half the time.â
âOh well. I guess I'm just used to them? I wake up next to Sif all the time so I'm used to having to figure out the little Sif quirks that make each one different. Mal's easy enough. Big old cute eyes.â
You hate it when Isabeau talks cute like that. At least when he does it in front of others. Sadnesses aren't supposed to be cute!! Too much emotion⌠no wonder you popped out again. You slowly crawl back towards Isabeau. Clinging to his side opposite to the new weirdo sitting on your bed.
âAw, Mal. Don't worry, Reuben's a nice guy. Oh! Right! Mal, did you hear about Loop?â
You nod. Of course you know. Siffrin won't stop talking about them. Manically flipping between the joy of having them back and worrying that confessing to them is going to make everything worse.
âI'm surprised the boss agreed to this in the first place.â Reuben states.
âYou mean taking us to Dormont? Why, I'd imagine having the saviors aboard your trope would only increase turnout.â
You notice Isabeau's face scrunch. Something about this boss is rubbing Isabeau the wrong way. Perhaps he's familiar with this place?
Reuben continues the conversation. âYeah, but we're also skipping any shows in a big place like Bambouche. As far as ze's concerned, we're losing out on recognition. Whatever your other darkless haired friend told zir, it really fired zir up.â
âOther darkless haired⌠Oh you mean Halley? I wouldn't exactly call them a friendâŚâ
You bury yourself in blankets. You don't like thinking about that person. You don't like remembering how you used to be back at the inn.
Odile seems to ponder something for a while. âIsabeau, do you have any thoughts on Halley's plan?â
âThe Dreamcraft stuff? Honestly, it gives me the creeps. Feels like using Wishcraft to fix a wish wouldn't really work, you know? I'm in favor of Miraâs plan. I think the Change god could make a real difference in Siffrin's health.â
You're a little lost at what everyone was talking about. You have the vague idea that Siffrin and the King know about it, but the memory is blocked.
{It's not something you need to know.}
You glare at him inside your mind. At least you're not the only one in the dark. You look to Reuben⌠who is nodding along as if he understands terms like Wishcraft. No, he's nodding along at the wrong times⌠he's trying to look smart. He turns to catch you staring at him from underneath your blankets.
He smiles and waves. It feels fake. You hide underneath the blankets. Which works out perfectly as an obnoxious bell from outside starts ringing.
âOh.â Reuben says. âThat's the role call before leaving. You better make sure the rest of your party is here. Chasing after the carriages is not fun.â
âI'll go check on Mira and LĂŠo!â Isabeau says as he runs out the door.
You're left in the room with Odile and Reuben. There's a sudden tension that permeates the air. As if something is about to attack.
Odile is the first to cut the tension.
âSomething you want to say Reuben.â
It's subtle. You're not sure Odile could see it from her distance. But Reuben is trembling.
âDo you know why Amore hires the people that ze does, what the history of the Poterian Traveling Theater is?â
âNo. I don't.â
âAmore is a very traditional Poterian. Fame above all else. The saviors being here is barely a footnote, and Loop wasn't hired because of their acting talent. No. About seven years ago, this place used to be known as the Poterian freak show. And while sentiments on morality may have changed, I can tell you, Amore's hiring methods have not.â
âSure, LĂŠopoldine is famous enough to ignore that barrier. But whatever Halley showed zir. Whatever thing was so great it convinced zir to change course straight to Dormont⌠it can't be good. Make sure you keep a close eye on Mal there. Amore's good at sniffing out the unique.â
Reuben walks out of the carriage. Leaving his warning hanging over the both of you. Odile turns to you with genuine concern.
âWe can travel on our own if you're worried."
You shake your head no. Siffrin wouldn't agree to that. Loop is here. They wouldnât want to be anywhere else, even if a meteor was about to crash into this place. You roll over in bed away from Odile. You're feeling tired again.
âRight then⌠I'm going to find the others, and see if Reuben has more research on your condition that could help you. I'll have Isabeau stay with you in the meantime. Goodnight Mal du Pays.
Hope you're all doing good. We're doing alright. Minus the bad job market still. We're currently working on a few new projects. Including a Deltarune fic about Pink. We're pretty sure the fanbase for ISAT and Deltarune is basically a circle so we hope you look forward to that. We also started streaming on twitch recently. It's been a lot of fun. You can find us by searching "Scrubbinn" Where we're playing Denshattack, Wanderstop, Ghost trick, and Frickbears 3.
Anyways that's enough shilling. Have a good couple of weeks while we work on the next chapter.
It sucks there seems to be a concerted effort to distance the transfem and transmasc communities from each other. If it werenât for trans women, I probably wouldnât have realized I was trans until much later in life.
The cis women in my life were so miserable in their womanhood, I thought that misery was normal. Seeing trans women actually love and fight to be seen as women made me question my own misery
For some reason sanism and cringe culture I've found internal relationships to be one of the biggest things people get weird about when it comes to DID.
Some of the worst takes I've seen either completely disregard it and say it's impossible / not real or worse, they essentially equate it to incest (ok so... first of all not all internal relationships are romantic or sexual, but that aside, masturbation is incest???)
But even when it's just people saying that internal relationships don't count or they're part of a delusion etc etc etc that's just fundamentally misunderstanding how DID works.
Our internal relationships are just as important as our external relationship with the partner.
But but but-look, if you think that sounds wrong, then I want to know why you believe that your relationship to yourself is less important than your relationships with others. That sounds unhealthy.
Discourse aside, I really do want to talk about this.
An internal relationship can be anything that an external relationship can be. Romantic. Sexual. Friends with benefits. Partners. Spouses. Exes. Kinky BDSM relationships with power dynamics. "What are we" relationships. All of the above is what I had in mind when I made the post, but as I said, it can have nothing to do with any of that, too. It can be platonic, familial, or even involve caretaker and therapeutic relationships.
The way we feel for each other is not less real than the way we feel for anyone else externally. The difference is that the way we interact and carry out those relationships is (obviously) within the context of sharing the same body.
Personal protectors for other specific alters (or enemies because of a protector vs persecutor thing).
An internal therapist to other alters.
We're real people so we have real relationships (they just happen internally, which is complex, and can be upsetting or frustrating at times in its own way). Parental figures are proud of the progress we make because they're watching their kids grow up. People can get jealous because of the time their favorite person is spending with another alter. We have years-long tension over breakups that cause some alters to avoid each other or not get along. Relationships between spouses were built over a long time before those alters considered themselves married. People stress over the way that dynamics change over the course of our life. Normal shit.
Hi! I just wanted to say that I like your âLight of my Lifeâ AU a lot, itâs really good :)
Also. Idk if this is in any way accurate but I canât stop thinking about like how the party reacting to Starfrin would be like that one meme with the two cakes and the artist in the first panel being like âaw man, that other cake is so much better than mine.â and the audience in the second reacting like âholy sh_t! Two cakes!â but then instead with the first panel being Starfrin and saying like âaw man, Loop is such a better Siffrin than me.â and then in the second panel the party going like âholy sh_t! Two Siffrins!â. Idk if this makes sense or if itâs accurate, Iâm just rambling lol. Point is, your AU is really good and I canât wait to read the next chapter once it comes out!! :D
Anyways, have a nice day!
Yeah this would happen.
Masterpost 2
Iâm glad youâre enjoying the fic! Iâm enjoying making it!
Another public service announcement. This time itâs air quality. Some of you are probably in it already if youâre in eastern Canada, New England or New York, but itâs sliding south, a huge mass of wildfire smoke. Please be careful. When it starts getting bad, especially, like when the sky gets orange or brownish, itâs best to run air purifiers in the house and wear N95 or KN95 masks when you have to go outside.
It harms your lungs and itâs especially bad for children (and pets!) or anyone with health problems. There are all kinds of chemicals in that smoke. Itâs not only trees that are burning. The heat already makes it harder to breath. This makes it worse.
If any of you are experiencing it, feel free to tell about it in the comments. đ
Also, throw out the mask every day and shower before you get in bed if youâve been out or youâll be breathing the particles all night. Stuff like that. It gets all over you, your skin, your hair, your clothes.
