#SENETAF—indeed indeed, i cannot tell, though i ponder on it well, which were easier to state, all my love or all my hate. surely, surely, thou wilt trust me when i say thou dost disgust me.
MUN INFORMATION: aries | 20+ | he/him | discord available for mutuals
This is a LOW ACTIVITY independent roleplay blog for my Viera Original Character (Hati Hrodvitnir) for the setting Final Fantasy XIV and related expansions. While I am just a touch canon divergent, I will still do my best to ensure that there's still a huge portion of his portrayal that adheres to canon. #endwalker spoilers will be tagged! If you’d like for me to tag spoilers for older expansions, please let me know.
I am a private blog. Which means that I will only interact with you if we follow each other. If I don’t follow you back within a week, you’re welcome to unfollow as it means I do not see our writing meshing or you are simply not a roleplay blog. This is a sideblog, so follows will come from @charmingbrute.
thread tracker // promo // information
RULES + OTHER INFORMATION BELOW.
These are just mun preferences that I’d like people to check out in case they have questions for me or with the character I write as. They aren’t rules, but more of a reference to make roleplaying with me easier.
GENERAL
Only use beta editor with me. Please don't make writing any harder.
Open to criticisms and such. The game has a wide lore and I’m not above missing information. I would like to be corrected if there are errors in my portrayal that I do not know of.
I’m all caught up with MAIN SCENARIO quests and SIDE QUESTS, so this profile will not be spoiler free. I’ll do my best to tag nevertheless.
This blog is NSFW. Sexual themes, violence, mental health struggles, psychological horror, abuse will be present here to name a few and will not be limited to such.
Have no shipping preference, but of course will not ship with minor writers/characters. I am 20+ and fine with NSFW but only with my fellow adults.
I am multi-ship and multi-verse!
Tracking the tag #SENETAF. Feel free to also mention me via @SENETAF. If you see that I haven’t liked your thing for me within three days, please let me know! I might have missed the notification.
Discord is available upon request. I also manage a Discord server for any players primarily from the North American Data Center, but those outside of it are free to hang out. Let me know if you want in!
Please don’t rush me to do replies.
Just let me know if you want to interact with Hati.
Please don’t hesitate to shorten your reply to me whenever. I don’t care about matching lengths, but I do try to match my partner as best as I can.
All ask responses are welcome to be continued!
BLOG
I am very accepting of other Original and Multi Characters. My only limit is real life people such as celebrities, politicians, youtubers, etc.
I like aesthetic and GPOSE blogs, but I am a roleplay blog and therefore would only really follow other roleplay blogs. I prefer it if you have a proper tagging system in place as well.
I’d appreciate it if you won’t steal any writing I do on this blog.
When writing with fellow masc presenting characters, I usually refer to my partner character as THEY/THEM. This is to avoid confusion and not at all an attempt to misgender your muse. If this bothers you, please inform me!
Icons or pretty graphics are not required to interact with me.
Will probably remain dash only.
Any inbox responses are welcome to be turned into a thread. No need to ask me for permission.
CHARACTER
I only write Hati within the Final Fantasy verse. Doesn’t matter if it’s from other titles within the series. I’d love to interact!
If you notice the lack of about page, that's very deliberate as I prefer people to find out things about my character through interactions. If this displeases you, you're always welcome to ask me about specific information and I'll answer as best as I can!
I could give writing him with other fandoms a shot provided I’m familiar with the source material or you’d be willing to inform me about it. Some fandoms I know: Dislyte, Genshin Impact, Drakengard and Nier Series, Other Final Fantasy Games, Fate Series, Persona Series, Resident Evil etc.
Will write Hati at any given point of MSQ. If undetermined, I will default to Shadowbringers!Hati after the events of Bozja.
I also have an ancient verse (Kharon)! So if you wish to interact with him, simply mention that you want him specifically.
All kinds of relationships are welcome in this blog.
and know that in the friendship of the lover there is no real kindness; he has an appetite and wants to feed upon you: As wolves love lambs so lovers love their loves.
Wikipedia // Emily Skala, Brute // Plato // George Waggner, the Wolf Man (1941) // Florence + the Machine, Howl // Jan Fyt, a dead wolf (1600s) // Laura Marling the Beast
As the new recruit stepped onto the Scion Headquarters, at the Warrior of Light's behest, his senses were awash with the opulent display of valiancy that surrounded him. Chandeliers hung from the ceilings, glistening in the light of a hundred flickering candles. The walls were adorned with paintings so magnificent that they seemed to come to life before his very eyes. Despite the grandeur of it all, the Viera didn't seem impressed. He had seen what these heroes could do, and he had witnessed power wielded with a heavy hand. No, the Scions held no sway over him.
That is, until he caught the gaze of a Miqo'te woman across the room. Her eyes were unlike any he had ever seen before, a deep, soul-piercing hue that seemed to hold within them secrets untold. They were trained upon him, unblinking and intense, and he couldn't help but feel a shiver run down his spine. Was she observing him, or was she simply lost in thought? He couldn't tell, but one thing for certain: it was painful to be within its reach. As he moved about through the wide room, the woman's eyes seemed to follow him, or so he thought. He tried to ignore her, but the weight of her gaze was too much to bear. It was as if she could see straight through him, unraveling his very being with a single look. From her smell, he concluded she was dangerous in a way he couldn't quite put into words. But still, he couldn't help but be fascinated by her, by the mystery that surrounded her.
He just had to break the silence. "Why are you looking at me like that? Surely this is not the first time you have seen my kind before."
— from @senetaf: “I have feelings for you. I do. But it’s not love. I could never trust you enough for it to be love.” (senetaf) / prompt
Wrapped in sheets as they are and still — or at least they were supposed to be — basking in the afterglow of another night spent together, of another night learning each other’s bodies, and then… and then… How did the conversation come to this? Why did she allow herself to say anything? At least she wasn’t foolish enough to tell him how far she had fallen, instead only offering up the briefest glimpse into her feelings. Even so, it’s hard to contain the shatter of her heart at those words and the immediate rage and grief that follows afterwards. They’d journeyed together for moons now, getting to know each other and bonding. Falling into bed together. Wasn’t trust supposed to have been built by now? Faith in each other? How much had she fooled herself into thinking there was something here? That there was something building between them? Had she truly been the only one to fall? What a gods damned fool she was — letting herself become vulnerable enough for this, allowing the loneliness of her life to cloud her mind, to chase her into his arms. She should’ve known better — she doesn’t need anyone other than Ram, wasn’t that how life was supposed to be for her? Despite the rage ( a rage directed inwards if anything ), she cannot blame him — not with his past, not with how she is. She’s always been an unloveable thing, that’s why she’d bound herself to Ram in the first place, wasn’t it? So she’d always have at least one person who wanted her, needed her, loved her. Why was she still so greedy for more when she knew that she was impossible to love? The instinct to cut and run rises up in her chest, ignited by the grief and lighting a flame she could use to burn every bridge but she chokes it down, bites back the instinct to lash out with cruel words.
Instead, Adrasteia's feet touch gently on the rug beside the bed as she swings her legs out of it. Shaking hands reach for the cigarettes and lighter she always keeps nearby and she moves to sit on the windowsill, knees drawn close to her body, taking in the moon high above. It takes a moment to get the cigarette lit, hands uncooperative with how badly they’re trembling — she’s sure all of her is trembling, but she can’t truly feel it. The rage and grief is starting to disperse and with it comes the numbness that always follows. The tip of the cigarette burns a cherry red and she inhales, slow and steady despite it all, holding the smoke until it burns at her lungs. Something to feel, maybe a way to punish herself, before releasing in a relaxed exhale. A farce, of course, but no one else needs to know that, except her, and Ram who will find her worse for wear later on when’s allowed herself to fall apart without prying eyes.
❝ I suppose it’s a good thing I could never love you then, either, hm? ❞ Adrasteia hums, gentle and tone neutral. A lie, a foolish lie, but she can’t… she can’t allow this to go any further. She won’t cut bridges, she won’t be harsh, but if it’s to protect herself, she’ll lie and stop this where it is. Maybe they’re both better off if he never loves her anyway. Gods knows she only ruins everything she touches anyhow. ❝ All we’re doing here is just finding company in each other, right? Sure, some feelings have developed but those feelings don’t ever have to change anything. ❞ Another inhale. Another exhale. Keep your voice steady still. You can survive this, you've survived worse than a broken heart. ❝ One day we’ll both find someone we can love and that’ll be the end of whatever this thing is, but for now, what we have is a good thing and it doesn’t have to go any further, wouldn’t you agree, Hati? ❞
Tucked in the sheets, Hati's mind was clouded with a thick fog. He struggled to recall the words that had passed between them before, the moments of tenderness and passion that had been shared. His memory was a jumbled mess, a tangle of images and sounds that refused to coalesce into a coherent narrative. He sought for some shred of recollection amidst feeling lost and disoriented. And then, he spoke. His words were like a sudden burst of lightning, illuminating the dark corners of their shared past with a harsh, unforgiving light. He mouthed with a brutal honesty that made himself shudder, revealing secrets and betrayals that neither of them had dared to acknowledge before. In his confusion, he had lost his filter, his ability to keep his lack of trust revea;ed. And in that time of vulnerability, he had bared his soul to her in a way that he never have done before. Their relationship had been built on such a fragile foundation of secrets and half-truths.
They had shared a warm bed several times before, oft times in the wild where none could find them, and each session had been an act of conscious choice. It was no coincidence that they had found themselves here, entwined in each other's presence. Their relationship had been forged in the fires of passion and desire, fueled by a deep and abiding need that neither of them could deny. They had been drawn together, unable to resist the pull of their shared lust. And yet, for all the intensity of their physical connection, the warg knew that this could never be aught more. He had made a decision not to allow it to be so. From the very start, he had been clear to himself that it was just a physical relationship. He had not thought about the consequences of it all, had not considered the potential for hurt or heartbreak. For him, it sufficed to simply enjoy the moment, to savor the pleasure of the Au Ra's touch and the taste of her lips. But now, as he lay there, he began to wonder if he had been foolish. Was it possible to separate the physical from the emotional, to compartmentalize their relationship in this way? Or was he setting them up for a fall, leading him and her both down a path that could only end in agony?
After all, love always came with a price.
He was unwilling to pay for it again.
Hati remained under the evening light, silent and still, his breath held tightly in his throat. His mind was awash with a sense of finality, as if the knowledge that they couldn't be aught more had pierced his very being, drawing forth a bloodletting that he could not staunch. And yet, for all his pain, there was no sorrow in his heart. His eyes burned with an inner light, their glow reflecting the emptiness that pervaded his soul. He stared up at the ceiling, his gaze darting back and forth, unable to break free from the hypnotic trance that held him in its thrall. There was a discomfort in the room that was palpable, broken only by the soft sound of his labored breathing. Hati's body was taut with misplaced expectation, as if he were waiting for more words to follow, hoping she could change his mind, make him reconsider his own words. If such a thing was possible, he would've bled for it. But whatsoever it was that he waited for, it remained stubbornly out of reach, beyond the pale of his understanding.
The Viera gave her a pitiful yearning look, his eyes tracing the curves of her body as she got up from the bed, her hair cascading from her bare shoulders like silk. She didn't notice, lost in her own thoughts, and he was left alone with the jarring emptiness of the space she had just occupied. He turned to the side, his back against her frame by the window, and the weight of his longing came without a warning sign. The smell of smoke from her cigarette usually made him recoil in disgust, finding it an affront against nature which he so loved. Regardless, he was incapable of even standing up. He was glued to the bed, consumed by the raw emotions coursing through his own veins. Fingers tightly gripped at the thin sheets that barely covered his lower half. His eyes shifted to the walls from across him, unseeing. It was as if the weight of the realm had settled upon his chest, crushing him with the unbearable burden of his own existence.
She had told him that she could never love him, and he knew it to be true without a shadow of doubt, without burning questions. What else could he expect? No one could, really. Not the father who forgot him as a son. Not the mother who died. And his brother... well, his brother had simply given up on him, unable to endure even a moment longer in his company. Why would she be any different?
Slowly, his empty gaze settled upon his crow familiar, who perched upon the table with an unflinching gaze that seemed to see beyond the present time. The creature's piercing red eyes bore into his soul, as if it acknowledged the truth of the matter that he himself could not fully grasp. For Hati, the struggle to accept the hard reality of his situation weighed more than it should, and he was filled with overwhelming uncertainty. But the crow, with its unwavering presence and unspoken wisdom, seemed to offer a glimmer of hope. As he watched his feathered friend, he felt a sense of comfort in the creature's faith. Charon's red eyes spoke volumes, telling him that he did not need the woman or her love to survive. That they could part ways, and it would not leave the slightest impact on his life. It was the wisdom of the ages, or simply the innate understanding of the natural world. Whatever the case may be, the warg found solace in the knowledge that his familiar had bestowed upon him.
He opened his lips, the words bitter on his tongue. "...you're right."
— from @senetaf: [ URGE ] for the taller muse to tilt the shorter one’s chin up so they can look at their face. / prompt.
Despite how slow and gentle Hati is to reach for her face, Adrasteia still flinches back instinctively. She feels worn, fragile, vulnerable and glazed over eyes do not hide any of the exhaustion that dwells within them. The impassive mask she oft adorns is too energy consuming right now to even truly consider, as much as she would like to don it and present the strength she’s always meant to carry.
Nonetheless, despite the initial hesitation, the au ra does not deny the grip on her chin, nor does she refuse to allow her face be tilted up to meet his. Their eyes do not meet, however, not when she's quick to switch her focus to wall next to them instead. A painful throb in her temple screams at her not to repeat the harsh action and drying blood staining her skin begins to crack from her movements. Hell knows there’s likely still some fresh blood somewhere too — surely it hasn't been long enough for all of it to have dried? A fleeting thought that disperses quickly when Adra's far too aware passage of time never feels real to her when she's like this. She longs to shrink into something smaller that cannot be perceived when she’s this unsightly, to hide away until the bruising and gashes heal and she's no longer a creature to be pitied.
❝ I’m okay. ❞ Adrasteia murmurs, barely willing to break the silence of the room, especially to fill it a lie she’s trying to tell herself because she knows that the viera certainly won’t believe it. ❝ It’s not only my blood, that’s something, at least, isn’t it? ❞
With a gentle but firm grip, he tilted her chin up, revealing the full extent of her wounds. Her face was a canvas of red and purple, adorned with fresh and dried blood, a testimony to the violence she had endured. He could see the shame etched in her eyes, the guilt and the despair becoming the elephant in the room. Despite the gruesome sight before him, he did not recoil or turn away. Instead, he sighed and simply nodded at her bold-face lie. He was determined to ease her troubles, however little he could at present moment.
With a steady hand, he reached for his pouch, carefully selecting the herbs and potions that would heal her wounds. He whispered an incantation, and a warm glow emanated from his hands, enveloping her body. As he worked his magicks, he could feel the wounds closing, even those that tried to hide from his prying eyes. His face slowly relaxed, the worry giving way to a faint smile of relief. He hoped that they would offer some comfort and solace.
When he was done, he lowered his hand and looked at her wordlessly. He knew that he had no right to judge her or to mock her for the blood she had received or shed. "Careful now," he said softly, "...and let the magicks do their work. There should be a river nearby. Let's get you cleaned, shall we? Your blood or no, I'm certain we both prefer it if you're not wandering about like that."
when you're angry, all your defenses go up. the unfortunate person or thing that managed to piss you off is suddenly talking to a wall. On the inside, you're screaming and crying and cussing them out, but somehow you can't express it. you're blank. emotionless. to anyone's knowledge, you could be zoning out of a lecture. because of this, it's hard to express how you're feeling when the person asks for your thoughts. you've choked your feelings down, and they won't come back up.
TAGGED BY: @/voidb0und ( ty baby )
TAGGING: @diegesis-x-dolonia, @bitterseadrop, @whsperwind, @vixlenxe, @primalvessel and you!
i'll write an about page for kharon eventually and kerberos for hati's ancient self. probably when i resub cause i still have no idea what i want to do for kerberos
