SeraphinaAureline

29 | Light-Skinned AfroLatina Trans Woman | MDNI | Mother of The Internet Transfeminine Diaspora | Server: https://discord.gg/seraphina

[seraphina-aureline]

Seraphina's Transfeminist Sanctuary

Seraphina’s Transfeminist Sanctuary exists to provide a permanent cultural home for the Internet Transfeminine Diaspora.

We are not a battlefield, a faction, or a temporary campaign. We are a sanctuary: a place for scattered people to gather, put down roots, and build communal life together.

Our mission is to cultivate an environment of warmth, literacy, creativity, mutual care, continuity, and shared cultural memory.

Through recurring rituals, conversation, art, cinema, reading, governance, and fellowship, we seek to preserve and nurture the living culture of transfeminine community life.

This house is founded on the belief that people deserve more than endless conflict and isolation. They deserve somewhere to belong.

Here, we keep the hearth lit.

✦ To join the Sanctuary: discord.gg/seraphina

[nbarpf]

One of my all-time favorites

[reachperfection]

[estrogenesis-evangelion]

if you've never been clinically depressed, this is the short version

[lanaflowerz]

[itsjunetime]

clowngirl getting an orchiectomy and the surgeon just keeps removing ball after ball after ball after ball after

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

clown nurse standing by solemnly adding each successive ball to the ones she's already juggling

[slab-o-meat]

crabs are so gentle, they can be so kind. their claws? precise little things, so careful in the sand, so careful with food. they do what they must to live and wave their claws to express their joy to the world for giving so much to them, for giving such kindness to these creatures known as crabs. please be gentle to crabs

[slab-o-meat]

i was on. a new sleep medication last night

[motoyuuri]

cultivate bird-forward language. "Im so happy!" -> "im so harpy". Now you are a bird also

[juney-blues]

it will never not piss me off how being unskilled at drawing and slightly too autistic/furry is grounds for your art to be ridiculed by default.

[juney-blues]

I've seen a lot of technically incompetent painful to watch garbage, but because it didn't look like Nyan Nyan neko sugar girls it was all ridiculed far less than stuff I enjoyed watching way more

[juney-blues]

one of the largest harassment campaigns fucking ever was started because someone drew a comic that looked kinda cringe. doesn't that piss you off. doesn't that drive you fucking insane. I wish we could all just be normal about beginner art.

[seraphina-aureline]

The One Who Loved Frozen

A Requiem for a Girl That Never Existed

The one who was obsessed with Anna and Elsa.

The one who used to sing Let It Go like no one was listening.

The one whose favorite color used to be purple.

The one who wanted to dress as a princess for Halloween.

The one who asked me if he could paint his nails too.

The one who wished we could wear pretty dresses.

The one who sat through The Magic School Bus with me.

The one I taught how to use a microscope.

The one I bought a tiny model of the solar system for because I wanted him to see how beautiful the universe was.

The one who used to watch Strange Aeons videos with me.

The one who came home from school, ten years old, and casually told me that he had trans friends.

The one who thought it was the coolest thing in the world that I painted my nails black.

The one who later said he didn't want to listen to Elton John because he didn't like "gay music."

The one who later told me I was breaking the rules.

The one who later told me I was disobeying God.

The one who would later call me "faggot".

The last time I spoke to him was six months ago.

"Tata," as is his nickname for me.

I called because I wanted one last chance to tell him that I loved him.

I told him, calmly, that he wasn't obligated to love me.

Love cannot be demanded.

But if he chose to walk the same path as the rest of our family—a path where my existence as a woman was something to be denied, corrected, or condemned—it was a path I could not walk beside him.

He answered:

"I'm not talking to you little brother to big brother. I'm talking to you man to man. You need to stop being a little bitch and call mom."

I told him that I couldn't.

He answered:

"Delusional. You'll never be my sister. You'll always be my older brother."

...

There are some people you lose to death.

There are others you lose while they're still alive.

People ask me sometimes why I don't just call.

Why I don't try again.

Why I don't go back.

The answer isn't that I don't miss them.

It's that I do.

I miss my little brother every day.

I miss the child who loved Frozen.

I miss the one who sang Let It Go without a trace of self-consciousness.

I miss the one who wanted to see the universe through a microscope.

I miss the one who asked if he could paint his nails too.

I miss the one who wished we could wear pretty dresses.

I miss the one who thought black nail polish was the coolest thing in the world.

I miss the one who told me, with complete innocence, that he had trans friends at school, as though there were nothing unusual about it.

And I remember.

Whether she's in there anymore or not—whether she ever was—I still carry that little girl's dreams with me.

[paper-mario-wiki]

transitioning is like putting on the They Live glasses and seeing that 90% of people looking at you are either jerking off or furiously sharpening a knife. or both. and i do not mean that in a sexy or fun way, and i dont like clarifying that, but i know there's a 90% chance you are thinking it, because i wrote it while being a trans woman.

[paper-mario-wiki]

to clarify:

when considering the sexual violence against trans women, it's important to remember that "people only view us sexually" does not mean the same thing as "people only find us attractive". it means "people can only conceptualize of our existence within a sexual light" because that's how the majority of our coverage in media has been tinged in the past century. as a result of the chaste and patriarchal nature of modern capitalism, gender and sexuality are inseparable in much public discourse by virtue of propaganda, and as a result, a trans woman is seen as sexual because efforts towards projecting specifically femininity is only categorized as sexual. and when paired with the uncharitable perception of "man", that propaganda can often evolve how people view us directly into "sexual threat" anywhere, for any reason. i could be in the freezer aisle of costco looking down at the ground while i push my cart and i'd still get dirty looks for wearing a dress (this has happened).

when i say "they're either jerking off or sharpening a knife", i mean we're either viewed sexually, or as sexually threatening, in almost all scenarios.

[NOTE: AS WITH ALL MATTERS OF TRANSMISOGYNY, THIS ISSUE IS 100 TIMES WORSE FOR BLACK GIRLS]

[seraphina-aureline]

The Witches You Couldn't Burn

I called my father today.

It's the first time I've spoken to anyone from my pre-transition life since I escaped four years ago.

I called him because, as a gay man who had also endured homophobia from my mother and stepfather, I thought maybe he would understand.

He, too, had cut off his family when he was young in order to survive.

And unlike almost everyone else around me—people who were complicit in my family's abuse and their attempts to force me into religious conversion therapy—he had always been different.

Throughout my childhood, and on multiple occasions throughout my life, he warned me that I needed to get away from my mother before she ruined my life forever.

Those warnings stayed with me.

In many ways, they saved my life.

This morning I woke up thinking about him.

I unblocked only his number, and I called.

I asked him if he remembered those warnings.

I asked him if he still believed them.

...

He didn't.

He told me that he and I, as queer people, are "divergent," and that we have no right to expect the mainstream to accept us. That we need to be patient. Understanding.

That it's only when we stop looking for acceptance that we truly find it.

...

When I came out to him, at 19, as a transgender woman, he told me something I never expected.

He said, "Actually... me too. Ever since I was little, I wished I could be a girl."

That sentence has been echoing in my head all day.

Because somewhere inside him was a little girl who believed another life was possible.

Who dreamed of escape.

Who dreamed of becoming herself.

Who dreamed of a world where she could simply exist and be loved.

Maybe she doesn't believe in that world anymore.

Maybe she buried that dream a long time ago.

But I do.

I still believe that a better life is possible.

I still believe that we deserve more than survival.

I still believe that, one day, trans girls will be free.

Even if she's given up on that dream...

I still carry it with me.

We are the daughters of the witches you couldn't burn.

[wizardpepsi]

baseball players in the 20s were all named shit like Dipsy Doodle and Crunch Johnson

[sistertaxon]

[sistertaxon]

[humming-fly]

#they named them like cats in a shelter

[lavendersalve]

[sistertaxon]

[redstonedust]

sticks my finger in the barrel of your gun so it backfires on you looney toons style but the gun moaned and now none of us know what genre we're in.

[lucy---lou]

How the recently captured ferals look like trying to escape the affini

[seraphina-aureline]

Seraphina's Transfeminist Sanctuary

Seraphina’s Transfeminist Sanctuary exists to provide a permanent cultural home for the Internet Transfeminine Diaspora.

We are not a battlefield, a faction, or a temporary campaign. We are a sanctuary: a place for scattered people to gather, put down roots, and build communal life together.

Our mission is to cultivate an environment of warmth, literacy, creativity, mutual care, continuity, and shared cultural memory.

Through recurring rituals, conversation, art, cinema, reading, governance, and fellowship, we seek to preserve and nurture the living culture of transfeminine community life.

This house is founded on the belief that people deserve more than endless conflict and isolation. They deserve somewhere to belong.

Here, we keep the hearth lit.

✦ To join the Sanctuary: discord.gg/seraphina

[terraswallows]

Smoking absolutely destroys your estrogen.

[escuerzoresucitado]