february update: academics and books
Finals season had me in its grip but I've emerged to see another day!
- mostly maintained ballet and climbing; my climbing instructor called my progress impressive, yay!, the meet-ups haven't happened yet
- tennis: went to every lesson, bought a tennis racket, getting along superbly with my fellow tennis students and learning their stories, improving my eye-hand-coordination and stamina, my God
- kept texting my two climbing acquaintances and got invited by both of them (the man's invitation kind of sounded like a date and was preceded by flirting, my february goal) but declined because I was stressed, time-pressed and also broke. Not ideal but it's practice?
Volunteering/extra-curricular network
- attended two volunteer meetings
- attended a digital book club meeting of a literary salon that I joined this year
Uni network
- proud member of two solid, small but mighty friend groups (woo!)
- passed my French final and am now proudly A1-certified
- talked to/texted four new course mates and got curved by two of them; oh well, let's see if I can befriend them when lectures start again
- went out with friend group A and strengthened my association with the upper class kid (no longer insecure and able to converse enjoyably without a third person buffer, that's so much inner progress)
- had lunch with my social butterfly course mate and invested in that friendship (lovely guy!)
- chatted with an unknown student in the library and exchanged numbers and promise to connect sometime
Conclusion: I can talk to single people and very small groups quite easily at this point, indeed, my social skills are now level 2! The next level is improving follow-up and engineering reconnection.
- finals season: 5 exams in the last two weeks and I feel great about 4 of them! my study habits improved, social media use decreased but measured, self-controlled browsing is still a struggle
- intense research into and conversation about the role of humanism in the upper-class habitus, will compose a post on it
The preview: The German 20th century is mostly non-existent when it comes to laudable ideals (that weren't resistance-related) and much of its elite fled national socialism. Therefore, Germans often look to the 19th century and specifically, the humanist, education reformer Wilhelm von Humboldt, a noble renaissance man who believed in the value of the classic education. Since the financial elite is comparatively unsuccessful (or just invisible to me as a pleb), conspicuous consumption is derided and overt luxury often viewed unfavourably, intellectual, educational markers became a way to distinguish oneself through: the humanist education of the bildungsbürgertum (historically, the intellectual elite).
[Note from the editor: This is the perspective of someone outside of the club, so to speak, and as such consists mostly of research, second-hand anecdotes, hypotheses and/or conjectures. My theory is sadly incomplete until I have the experience to prove it.]
I read an engrossing sociology book on how schooling in Latin and ancient Greek lessons vs. English and French have been employed as distinguishing mechanisms (now that a degree has become standard) with further notes on the relevant lifestyles/habitus' and their strategies. Since language and 'knowledge' courses are free at uni and I am, in fact, a broke student, I am strategizing on how I can best adopt this background as my own with the available resources. The scope is overwhelming but I remain fascinated.
- finished or currently reading: Dostoevsky "The Player", Kafka "The Burrow", Volckmer "The Appointment", bell hooks "All About Love", Auchincloss "Her Infinite Variety", Wittenborn "The Social Climber's Bible" (tumblr recommendation)
- my diet suffered because I made the choice to ignore my diet while studying. I don't regret but now it's a priority again so back to basics I wanted to flirt and I did! I think someone asked me out. Unfortunately, I had zero interest in him and the date he was proposing.
Reflection: I accomplished less this month and made my peace with that. Trying to maintain separate schedules concurrently during finals drove me insane which means that I'm just not there yet and that's okay. I'll get there.
My focus in March is
- GETTING HOTTER, i.e. going jogging and doing pilates at least once weekly, getting my diet back on track and creating my spring look,
- having a bouldering meet with friend group A, charming my sports courses after this period of distraction, possibly meeting with friend group B,
- doing further sociology research, practicing french, doing business-related research, figuring out my humanist education crash course,
- reading Meier's "Modern Etiquette Made Easy", Byron's "The Old Money Book", Griffin's "Book of the Courtesans", White's "Simply Irresistable" (tumblr recommendations) and applying them,
- maintaining this study schedule and increasing my work capacity, studying ahead in two upcoming subject courses, finishing strong in my last two exams!
With everyone enjoying their holidays, regular meetings have greatly diminished which makes this "hibernation" an ideal opportunity to revamp my look and rejoin as my new and improved self. Updates will also be more regular from now on. :)
