This Is Kaos!

This is an RP blog for the character Siegfried from the 1965 sitcom 'Get Smart'.

[lesbianshepard]

I would be the worst spy of all time because on one hand I overshare like hell, but on the other hand I also have THE shittiest memory so it’s really a lose/lose scenario for everyone involved.

[lesbianshepard]

guy interrogating me: What’s the passcode?

me: Ah fuck. I think it might be 792.....4?

me: Actually no I think it starts with a 2.

me:

me: Yeah I usually just rely on muscle memory for it. Do you think you could get a keypad in here? That might be faster.

[lesbianshepard]

guy interrogating me: who do you work for?!

me: Okay, so this is super embarrassing. I know he told me his name when we first met but I forgot and at this point it would be weird if I asked him for his name again, right? So I just kind of go with “sir” whenever I have to talk to him. It might be David though. He looks like a David.

[lesbianshepard]

me, after being extracted: bad news guys, I totally blew Dave’s cover.

my boss: Wait, what?

me: Yeah, like they had knives and shit and it was kind of stressful so I just told them that my contact’s name was David Johnson. Really sorry about that.

boss: We don’t have a David Johnson working for us. Are you thinking of James?

me: 

me: Good news, guys, I did not blow James’ cover!

[lesbianshepard]

Enemy 1: So, how did the interrogation go?

Enemy 2: We got nothing. All they did was ramble on about their childhood trauma for two hours.

Enemy 1: Hmm. maybe lower the dose of the truth serum next time.

Enemy 2: We didn’t use truth serum.

[siegfriedthegreat]

As a Get smart nerd I'm delighted by this work development.

@xifindthathardtobelievex @bythxtmuch

[dragon-in-a-fez]

well since no one else is going to perform this vital public service here are some reviews of the top ten gun violins on google, by a violist who has shot a gun like twice.

3/10. strings seem to disappear and there are no tuning pegs. impossible to aim as a gun because violin body gets in the way. 3 points for classic black finish, never goes out of style for murders at the symphony.

0/10. same aiming problem as the last one and with strings that short the sound you produce will kill people on its own so why have a gun. also seems to be cut like you’re supposed to shoulder-mount it like a rocket launcher, which is a terrible idea with this kind of gun.

6/10. looks like they’ve gone for an electric violin which is a great choice! it fits the aesthetic and you don’t need to worry about the instrument body this way. heavy, but the weight is concentrated near the chin so should be fine for short sessions. tuning pegs are directly in the firing line so using the gun destroys the violin, only fire as a last resort.

2/10. not fit for either purpose. stupid fake gun gets in the way of the bow, and there’s no sound chamber at all. plus, where do you even put your shoulder. 2 points because I guess you could put it on your wall as a weird art piece.

8/10. finally someone is thinking this through! the retractable barrel and folding fingerboard offer good flexibility and the bridge even doubles as a handy iron sight! needs to be de-strung to fire, so limited on-the-fly mode switching.

1/10. firing the guns will absolutely annihilate the scroll but you might as well because it would have terrible sound anyway. 1 point for thinking of left-handed violinists for once.

-4/10. not even a gun, just a violin that lets you scope the audience for dramatic effect.

5/10. useful if you want to shoot yourself and the conductor at the same time, which is frequently a mood.

6/10. he a little confused, but he got the spirit. technically works as both weapon and instrument but be VERY careful putting it under your chin if you haven’t unloaded the bolt.

-100000/10 what the fuck

[babyanimalgifs]

omg i’m in love

[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[odditymall]

The Leatherdos is a hair clip that doubles as a multi-tool that combines 5 different tools in a tiny hair clip: screw-drivers, a wrench, a trolley coin, a ruler, and a cutting edge.

—->http://odditymall.com/leatherdos-is-a-hair-clip-multi-tool

[captcreate-deactivated20251226]

This some of that James Bond shit.

[justsomefuckingguy]

Swiss Army Hairclip

[grandenchanterfiona]

Imagine you get kidnapped or some shit, how useful that might be?

[fallen-angel-nightshade]

FINALLY!!!

[naamahdarling]

Lightly hot glue a flower to it and you could make it cute and frilly without sacrificing functionality. Low temp hot glue pops right off.

[fearlessjones]

this is some Kingsman shit right here

[mageofcolors]

@mysterysolver

[literalbirdperson]

Fun story: I have one of these, and wore it every day while working as a vet assistant at a pet clinic. One day a kitten comes in with a cord knotted around her neck, and everyone’s trying to get it unknotted before she heads in for her spay.

I just whip off the hair clip, grab the cord, and slice through it in one go. Everyone stood there, surprised, and stared at the cord in my hand that I just sawed through with a hair clip. 

This would be AMAZING if you got kidnapped, or, in this case, a pet gets tangled in something. It’s very light and flexible, but the insides of the teeth are sharp enough to get the job done.

[effulgentpoet]

she’s seen every episode. on purpose. (a moodboard for every show i watch)

GET SMART (1965-1970)

You’ll be in extreme danger every minute. And… loving it.

[siegfriedthegreat]

I think I found one of their headquarters in Eastern Europe during my travels.

[natanvance]

Chaos is the score upon which reality is written.

Henry Miller (via natanvance)

@siegfriedthegreat omg I felt like this would be such a  good Kaos quote. 

(via xifindthathardtobelievex)

[strivia]

This vid I started a while back, but picked up and finished last night!  It’s what got me to make that post yesterday.

[unbe--weave--able]

“Any bones broken?” - Siegfriedthegreat

“For the thousandth time, no there aren’t. I checked myself, and yes, I am capable of that much at least.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

Siegfried sighed, letting his folded arms fall to his side.  His fingers explored the wall of rubble currently blocking them in.  “If you’re certain,” he relented stiffly.  “But we’re still not going anywhere anytime soon thanks to the explosion.”

[unbe--weave--able]

“In my defense it was a brilliant explosion and it served its purpose.” She grinned proudly, brushing some of the dust out of her hair and off her clothes. “And yes, I’m certain. I’m 100% fighting fit, as always.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

He flicked a piece of rubble off her shoulder, trying to keep the set of his mouth serious as a grin fought to appear.  “Vell, I can’t argue with you on that.  Best keep alert since vie don’t know which side will find us.”

[unbe--weave--able]

“Well, hopefully the other side is just as trapped as we are and won’t be able to get to us.” Though knowing their luck at the moment they would probably end up being found and nearly captured, again.

[siegfriedthegreat]

He hummed absently in response.  He tried to get a sense of how stable the rubble around them was, it wouldn’t do for it to end up caving in on them.  They’d have to be careful about how they attempted to get out.  Next he attempted to determine if there were any gaps letting in air, or if they were on a clock with this.

[memeroundups]

Send ‘rough touch’

and the generated outcome will be used for a small drabble scenario or starter { tw violence, possible noncon/dubcon implications, nsfw }

Your muse throws a punch at mine.

My muse throws a punch at yours.

Your muse suddenly grips my muse’s hair.

My muse suddenly grips your muse’s hair.

Your muse roughly grabs my muse’s arm.

My muse roughly grabs your muse’s arm.

Your muse grips my muse’s hips.

My muse grips your muse’s hips.

Your muse wraps their hands tightly around my muse’s neck.

My muse wraps their hands tightly around your muse’s neck.

Your muse slams mine against a wall hard.

My muse slams yours against a wall hard.

Your muse pushes my muse to their knees.

My muses pushes your to their knees.

Your muse bites mine.

My muse bites yours.

Your muse clutches their hand tightly around my muse’s mouth to silence them.

My muse clutches their hand tightly around your muse’s mouth to silence them.

Your muse grabs my muse’s wrists.

My muse grabs their muse’s wrists.

Your muse attempts to shove away mine.

My muse attempts to push off yours.

Your muse roughly kisses mine.

My muse roughly kisses yours.

Your muse pins mine onto the ground.

My muse pins yours to the ground.

Your muse delivers beatings to mine.

My muse delivers beatings to yours.

Your muse breaks my muse’s arm.

My muse breaks your muse’s arm.

Mun chooses.

[unbe--weave--able]

“Any bones broken?” - Siegfriedthegreat

“For the thousandth time, no there aren’t. I checked myself, and yes, I am capable of that much at least.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

Siegfried sighed, letting his folded arms fall to his side.  His fingers explored the wall of rubble currently blocking them in.  “If you’re certain,” he relented stiffly.  “But we’re still not going anywhere anytime soon thanks to the explosion.”

[unbe--weave--able]

“In my defense it was a brilliant explosion and it served its purpose.” She grinned proudly, brushing some of the dust out of her hair and off her clothes. “And yes, I’m certain. I’m 100% fighting fit, as always.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

He flicked a piece of rubble off her shoulder, trying to keep the set of his mouth serious as a grin fought to appear.  “Vell, I can’t argue with you on that.  Best keep alert since vie don’t know which side will find us.”

[unbe--weave--able]

“Any bones broken?” - Siegfriedthegreat

“For the thousandth time, no there aren’t. I checked myself, and yes, I am capable of that much at least.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

Siegfried sighed, letting his folded arms fall to his side.  His fingers explored the wall of rubble currently blocking them in.  “If you’re certain,” he relented stiffly.  “But we’re still not going anywhere anytime soon thanks to the explosion.”

[siegfriedthegreat]

them: ur fave is shit

me: absolutely *pulls out handwritten 27 page report on exactly how and why they are shit*

[siegfriedthegreat]

Guys, I’m free from classwork now, so if there’s a thread you wanted me to pick back up, or one you have an idea for shoot me a message.

[strivia]

Not that I don’t love them platonically, cause their friendship is absolutely adorable (and tends to be portrayed with a sibling slant), but honestly Max & Hymie are so shippable?  Like, let’s look at this for a second.

Hymie overcame his evil programming because he couldn’t bring himself to kill Max.

Hymie later overcame his niceness programming as well to protect Max.

Max defending Hymie.

The cheek kisses!

Max constantly putting his arm around his shoulders.

That one episode they were super domestic.

You can’t deny their cuteness, whether you like it platonically or romantically.