The Tale of Silver Tongue

If I told you anything about myself, there's a chance I'd be lying. If I told you the truth, you'd never know it. I can convince any one of anything, and don't you bother arguing over that, friends. I'll tell you my story, and it's up to you to believe it. Just don't get mad if you find yourself short a few bits when I'm done. [MLP:FIM Text Blog None of the art on this blog is mine. I'll source any art that I do post.] ((This is not an RP blog.))

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((boo))

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((is this blog dead?

or was it never alive to begin with?????

is a mystery))

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((Hey, all. Temporarily reviving this blog to kinda... vent, I guess?

So, a lot of you probably know that we lost someone recently. @askrustynail was a good guy. I didn’t know him. I spoke with him once or twice to recommend a friend’s blog for a drink.

It’s weird how the loss of someone you barely know, who you only know through shared acquaintances, can affect you. Yet I feel this. I feel for his friends and loved ones.

I’m not able to drink alcohol, but if I could, I’d drink to Rusty’s memory.))

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((might try doing some writing for this guy. send in asks, please.))

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Silver Tongue Family Tree, Part 1

Plat Aluminium, the Former Heiress

And forgive me for not doing fancy formatting for these.

Silver Tongue’s mother, Plat Aluminium, was the daughter of a wealthy family from the land of Prance. Her great-grandfather had personally worked as a smithy and metallurgist for none other than Neighpoleon (Because the pun pretty much writes itself.)

Keep reading

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((for anyone still interested in this here horse))

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“Silver Tongue here. A lot of you are probably wondering where I’ve been.

“Well, I certainly wasn’t in jail. That much is obvious. There’s no way I’d be arrested more than three times in a year.

“Nope. I was actually in Alpacapulco, having amazing sex and even more amazing drinks. And I made a million bits.

“That last part is actually true.”

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((Friendly reminder that this blog still exists and Silver Tongue is still a horse.))

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FOR THE PUBLIC’S CONSIDERATION

THIS INTERNET BLOG IS CURRENTLY UNDER WATCH BY HER MAJESTY’S ROYAL INVESTIGATION BUREAU OF EQUESTRIA. ANY AND ALL POSTS, HASHTAGS, GIFS, AND MEMES WILL BE MONITORED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

FOR THE SAFETY OF YOURSELF AND OTHER LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS OF EQUESTRIA, PLEASE CONTACT SPECIAL AGENT PUZZLE PEACE IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION REGARDING THE WHEREABOUTS OF SILVER TONGUE (ALIAS, FOOL’S GOLD; ALIAS, HAPENNY; ALIAS, OLD TRICKY DICK) OR ANY OF HIS KNOWN CRIMINAL ASSOCIATES.

STAY SAFE!

LOVE, THE POLICE

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Mod: Call for asks! Send in any questions or information you have so we can keep this storyline going!

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Pssst. I know where Silver Tongue is. *Whisper whisper*

Dear citizen,

Thank you very much for your attempt(?) at informing us about the whereabouts of wanted criminal Silver Tongue (Alias, ‘Old Man Two-Teeth’).

However, you didn’t actually tell us anything. You just wrote ‘*Whisper whisper*’. Is this some sort of new, hip club? Is it an archaic riddle?

Is this some sort of crank call? Er, ask.

Regardless, thank you for attempting to do something, I guess!

Signed,Inspector Puzzle Peace

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PSA

Crimes are still considered illegal in most parts of Equestria! One of these crimes, aiding and abetting, is on the rise.

What’s aiding and abetting? It’s a cool way of talking about an uncool crime. Aiding and abetting involves helping a bad dude avoid getting arrested by the police.

For a log of young dude kids, this might seem ‘cool’ and ‘rad’. By helping a criminal, it’s like getting close to crime without actually doing anything wrong!

But this is not ‘hip’ or ‘awesome’. It is ‘uncool’ and ‘bogus’. A crime is a crime. Don’t do the crime. 

I mean time.

Shit.

A PSA FROM THE EQUESTRIAN ‘HEY TEENS! DON’T DO CRIMES!’ COALITION.

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FOR THE PUBLIC’S CONSIDERATION

THIS INTERNET BLOG IS CURRENTLY UNDER WATCH BY HER MAJESTY’S ROYAL INVESTIGATION BUREAU OF EQUESTRIA. ANY AND ALL POSTS, HASHTAGS, GIFS, AND MEMES WILL BE MONITORED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

FOR THE SAFETY OF YOURSELF AND OTHER LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS OF EQUESTRIA, PLEASE CONTACT SPECIAL AGENT PUZZLE PEACE IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION REGARDING THE WHEREABOUTS OF SILVER TONGUE (ALIAS, FOOL’S GOLD; ALIAS, HAPENNY; ALIAS, OLD TRICKY DICK) OR ANY OF HIS KNOWN CRIMINAL ASSOCIATES.

STAY SAFE!

LOVE, THE POLICE

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Mod: Call for asks! Send in any questions or information you have so we can keep this storyline going!

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IMPORTANT UPDATE

As you may recall, we here at the Equestrian Royal Investigation Bureau have been asking for anypony with information regarding the whereabouts of Silver Tongue (Alias, ‘Captain Smooth’), a con artist and thief currently wanted for multiple counts of larceny.

Last night, an informant named Smart Mouth (Who wishes to remain anonymous) came to us with information on Silver Tongue’s current activates. Below is a transcript of what we were told:

“Yeah, I know him [Silver Tongue]. I didn’t know him very well, but I worked with him on occasion. Not illegally, though. Everything was strictly legal, and good… and I’ve never killed anyone. Not once.

“Now, when I first met him [Silver Tongue], he was going by the name of ‘Picket Paint’. He was younger back then. So was I. Everyone else was, too, except for my cousin… [he] talked me into giving him some information on a job. A legal job. He didn’t hustle a casino.

“Last time I saw him, I was working at this club– and not a front for a hamburger-smuggling operation– he comes in with this kid, and he says ‘Smart Mouth’, he says, ‘Smart Mouth, where’s my money?’

“So I give him the bits I owe him. Then, he has the nerve to point out that I gave him fake money. Like I’m made of bits? We got into a shouting match, some harsh words were exchanged; the kind of thing that happens between legitimate businessponies. Then he left.”

[…]

“No, I don’t actually know where he is. I just heard there was a reward. Can I get paid now?”

Judging by this anonymous testimony from Smart Mouth, who currently resides in Manehattan’s theater district, we have come to the conclusion that Silver Tongue is travelling with a child or child-like entity.

Once again, if you have any information pertaining to this case, please contact your local law enforcement, or e-mail us on our internet web.

– Inspector Puzzle Peace

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IMPORTANT UPDATE

As you may recall, we here at the Equestrian Royal Investigation Bureau have been asking for anypony with information regarding the whereabouts of Silver Tongue (Alias, ‘Captain Smooth’), a con artist and thief currently wanted for multiple counts of larceny.

Last night, an informant named Smart Mouth (Who wishes to remain anonymous) came to us with information on Silver Tongue’s current activates. Below is a transcript of what we were told:

“Yeah, I know him [Silver Tongue]. I didn’t know him very well, but I worked with him on occasion. Not illegally, though. Everything was strictly legal, and good... and I’ve never killed anyone. Not once.

“Now, when I first met him [Silver Tongue], he was going by the name of ‘Picket Paint’. He was younger back then. So was I. Everyone else was, too, except for my cousin... [he] talked me into giving him some information on a job. A legal job. He didn’t hustle a casino.

“Last time I saw him, I was working at this club-- and not a front for a hamburger-smuggling operation-- he comes in with this kid, and he says ‘Smart Mouth’, he says, ‘Smart Mouth, where’s my money?’

“So I give him the bits I owe him. Then, he has the nerve to point out that I gave him fake money. Like I’m made of bits? We got into a shouting match, some harsh words were exchanged; the kind of thing that happens between legitimate businessponies. Then he left.”

[...]

“No, I don’t actually know where he is. I just heard there was a reward. Can I get paid now?”

Judging by this anonymous testimony from Smart Mouth, who currently resides in Manehattan’s theater district, we have come to the conclusion that Silver Tongue is travelling with a child or child-like entity.

Once again, if you have any information pertaining to this case, please contact your local law enforcement, or e-mail us on our internet web.

-- Inspector Puzzle Peace

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FOR THE PUBLIC’S CONSIDERATION

THIS INTERNET BLOG IS CURRENTLY UNDER WATCH BY HER MAJESTY’S ROYAL INVESTIGATION BUREAU OF EQUESTRIA. ANY AND ALL POSTS, HASHTAGS, GIFS, AND MEMES WILL BE MONITORED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

FOR THE SAFETY OF YOURSELF AND OTHER LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS OF EQUESTRIA, PLEASE CONTACT SPECIAL AGENT PUZZLE PEACE IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION REGARDING THE WHEREABOUTS OF SILVER TONGUE (ALIAS, FOOL’S GOLD; ALIAS, HAPENNY; ALIAS, OLD TRICKY DICK) OR ANY OF HIS KNOWN CRIMINAL ASSOCIATES.

STAY SAFE!

LOVE, THE POLICE

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IMPORTANT UPDATE

The following individuals are wanted for questioning regarding the whereabouts and activity of Silver Tongue (Alias, ‘Not Silver Tongue. Me? Silver Tongue? Don’t be ridiculous. I’m not him. You’re being silly’.)

Godiva Nimbus

Silver Shill

Bronze Medal

Memento Mori

Doctor Snake Oil

The Flim Flam Brothers

A Talking Duck

Summer Rain

Mister Steely

The Nimble Twins

Smart Mouth

Someone who knows a lot about where criminals are.

M.A. Larson

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Dear police, are you investigating archives posts, or just preparing for future updates? I worry that your announcement may deter the horse that regularly posts here from continuing to do so. Thank you for your concern, though, and have a nice day. Love, endarkculi

Dear Citizen,

Hello! Thank you for contacting us. I am unsure as to why you chose to contact us through the blog of a pony we’re currently investigating, but that doesn’t matter. I don’t understand computers.

I am not at liberty to divulge what our investigation into ‘Silver Tongue’ (Alias, Captain Silverhoof) for fear that his accomplices may attempt to contact him. Suffice to say, we have seized all of his social media accounts in order to locate him. Somehow. I don’t know, the IT ponies told me this will help.

Please inform us if Silver Tongue attempts to contact you. Failure to do so could result in a fine, or possible criminal sentencing.

How do I close this message thing? Do I j

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FOR THE PUBLIC’S CONSIDERATION

THIS INTERNET BLOG IS CURRENTLY UNDER WATCH BY HER MAJESTY’S ROYAL INVESTIGATION BUREAU OF EQUESTRIA. ANY AND ALL POSTS, HASHTAGS, GIFS, AND MEMES WILL BE MONITORED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE.

FOR THE SAFETY OF YOURSELF AND OTHER LAW-ABIDING CITIZENS OF EQUESTRIA, PLEASE CONTACT SPECIAL AGENT PUZZLE PEACE IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION REGARDING THE WHEREABOUTS OF SILVER TONGUE (ALIAS, FOOL’S GOLD; ALIAS, HAPENNY; ALIAS, OLD TRICKY DICK) OR ANY OF HIS KNOWN CRIMINAL ASSOCIATES.

STAY SAFE!

LOVE, THE POLICE