Simona's Words of Wisdom

I have a lot of things to say. I usually say them even if people don't want or need to hear them at a given moment. So just in case you miss the important parts, you can use this tumblr as a reference guide. Also: I reblog a lot of things that I find interesting and are not necessarily my opinion, I just like exposing my readers to different ideas we forget exist!

[everydayantisemitism]

"Serves them right": graffiti on memorial in France to children sent to the gas chambers

[simonaswords]

"Class for women jobseekers"

The other day I got an invitation to a class for women searching for employment. 

It made me angry but more than that I just feel a little hopeless. 

We need a whole other set of classes to help us, just because we're women. It's not enough to go to a class on networking or resume writing. No, you should really be going to the one geared solely toward women. Correct me if I'm wrong, and I could be, but there aren't advertisements for 'classes for male jobseekers'. 

But maybe this isn't a way of telling me that I'm worse, just that I'm different. 

[classyavenues]

This was Europe around midnight

[theoverheardcampus-deactivated2]

Tufts University

"Are you a registered hipster? There are union benefits. You get a standard issue flannel."

[simonaswords]

2013 in Review

I'm a little late with posting this, but I was in the Holy Land celebrating the new year and all such fun things.  I wanted to review some of the interesting events that occurred this year both in the world and in my own life.  We started off the year swearing in President Obama for a second term. He hasn't lived up to my expectations, nor the expectations of many, but the man is the Commander in Chief and the President of one of the most 'problematic' nations in the world. So kudos to you for still keeping your head up.  There was the Typhoon in the Philippines, the bomb blasts across the Middle East, changes in Indian rape and sexual assault laws, some shocking prisoner releases in Russia along with the twin bombings in Volgograd, another handful of shootings in American schools and an airport, and countless of other positive (but mainly negative) news stories which exhaust our capacity for constant worry. 

This year my home town had the eyes of the entire country upon it after the Boston Marathon Bombings and the city wide shut down to catch the murderer Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. People in other nations laughed at how our city dealt with this situation, citing their own copious experience with terrorism. Understand though, that the Boston Marathon is a hallmark of patriotism for Bostonians and an incredible event which draws 20,000 participants and tens of thousands of spectators. I was there, along with a couple hundred Tufts students, three of whom were injured in the blasts. Our university was also shut down that Friday. While others may laugh, I am proud of BPD, and particularly the Watertown police department, for their response.  As for my own life, this year was the first time I spoke at Take Back the Night. That was an empowering but horrifically frustrating experience. It is truly shocking how actively political activists manage to rip each other apart, leaving no work to be done for their opponents and little success. I learned that the rode to a better environment for minorities of any sort is often made longer by internal disputes. 

I wrote a post for Hillel International, which is now up on their website. 

I grew closer with some amazing people and I met some people I intend to be friends with for a long time and greatly admire. They have motivated me to do better and feel better. All very important things.

All in all, its been a pretty solid year, and I'm looking forward to an even better one.

[simonaswords]

Reflections on Yad Vashem

Have you ever looked down at your feet while you walk? When the sole hits the ground your feet spread out and your arch flattens. Your toes grip the sweaty insides of your shoes. Your heels dig in, finding their place for a brief second, until its time to rise again. Step after step your feet manage to find the perfect spot to rest, unless you stumble.  Unless your shoes are replaced with wooden clogs. Unless the ground is frozen over. Unless you haven't eaten in days, or months, or years.  Yad Vashem, the Holocaust museum in Israel, has among its exhibits a pile of shoes from a Nazi camp. 

I don't know which camp. Was it a concentration camp or a death camp? Were the people deported there primarily from one nation? Are these shoes from Poland or Hungary, Greece or France? 

Every time I set my eyes on that display I find the one red heel sticking out of the pile. It's in the middle, across from the fourth chair. It's always there. Every time I desperately try to match it to the other red heels in the group but to no avail. Then it occurs to me how foolish it would be to wear heels to the cattle cars. It must have been early in the war, when not every knew where they were heading. But maybe not. I'd like to imagine this woman as defiant, making a last ditch attempt to look young and fit for the Doctor. She made it through and was sent to the right side. She saw countless friends fall to the Nazis and their collaborators, but the piece of bread someone had sneaked from the kitchen proved to be enough to keep her spirits up. She survived the war and lived a long life, emigrating to Israel and raising a healthy family before her peaceful death.  But I don't know if any of this is true. Most likely the owners of all these shoes did not live to see them again.  What is left is a pile of shoes and 2.5 acres of names of communities to commemorate those who were lost. 

[howmanyletters]

[simonaswords]

Genius

[simonaswords]

A bit of Shabbat wisdom courtesy of a passerby...

Today, while running a few errands, I asked the woman next to me if it had been a good year. With the holidays coming up the answer has usually been 'it was a good year but I wish this or that had gone better.' There was always something which had gone wrong and my companion was hoping to fix. This lady was different.  "It was a good year. Every year is a good year and every day is a good day. I rarely complain because I treat every day as an opportunity to do good, even if that good is within my family. There is no 'only' in doing good. I'm teaching my two beautiful kids that being a good person is the most important thing. They get A's in school and they like to learn, but I am happier to see them help a friend than see another A+ homework assignment." Shabbat shalom, and may you see good in the world in the coming year.

[simonaswords]

Stay safe Harvard. 

[simonaswords]

Perks of the Brainless Child

Yesterday a friend from home found out that he had been accepted to MIT. I joined my other friends in congratulating him and wishing him the best of luck in his studies. The rest of the year will be smooth sailing for him while the rest of the senior class struggles to finish their applications and keep their overall level of stress at appropriately high levels. 

Wonderful.

Two years out of high school and I'm still hung up on who got into what school. Most of my close friends are at the various Ivies and unofficial Ivies which pepper the US coasts. The rest headed to state schools to save money for the graduate schools everyone knows they'll get into. Harvard Law, Johns Hopkins for Medical School, and Stern. 

I ended up somewhere in the middle. Last time I checked, and I check often, Tufts was #25, three spots from when I applied. Top 30 of the 4,100 universities in the US alone. Shouldn't I be happy? 

Sadly, a good university doesn't guarantee a good job, or a successful life, and it certainly doesn't guarantee that I will be taken seriously. Instead of a discussion of what I'm studying, every time I come home I hear one resounding question, "so do you have a boyfriend yet?" 

My academic work is inconsequential. I am still reduced to my role in the shadow of a man who is bound to do greater things than I could even dream of. Don't get me wrong, I want to get married. I want kids. I want a family and all the trials and successes that come with raising children. 

There really is no in between for those of us who like to look good but also lead armies. Women are always one or another, never both. Even of my Ivy League friends, most of them are either men or incapable of having a social interaction.

I refuse to resign myself to such a fate.

[simonaswords]

Just realized today was my last day of classes state side for the next eight months. Holy shit. That's crazy. 

[auplaz-blog]

All of these are people who served in the military and were raped and sexually assaulted. Over 20% of female veterans and 1% of males have been sexually assaulted while serving, and rape has been labelled an “occupational hazard” for serving in the military.

I urge everyone to go watch the Academy Award nominated documentary The Invisible War. It’s on Netflix and the statistics and stories are shocking, eye opening, and disturbing.

[newwavefeminism]

I like what this Army officer had to say about sexual harassment in the military.

Thanks for the submission! Anti-feminist theory vs. actual REAL LIFE.

It’s sad because these ignorant school aged boys grow up to become people who make and impact policy, media and culture…

Imagine the people who serve who don’t have access to Majors who actually have a clue and work to maintain basic aspects of human dignity.

[simonaswords]

All around me are familiar faces Worn out places, Worn out faces Bright and early for the daily races Going nowhere, Going nowhere Their tears are filling up their glasses No expression, No expression Hide my head I want to drown my sorrows No tomorrow, No tomorrow Chorus And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad These dreams in which i'm dying, Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take When people run in circles its a very very Mad World, Mad World Children waiting for the day they feel good Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday And they feel the way that every child should Sit and listen, Sit and listen Went to school and I was very nervous No one knew me, No one knew me Hello teacher tell me whats my lesson Look right through me, Look right through me And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad The dreams in which i'm dying, Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take When people run in circles it's a very very Mad World, Mad World, Mad World, Mad World...

[simonaswords]

When the TW is a TW

A few weeks ago an activist in a national group dedicated to the implementation of Title IX posted an article with several trigger warnings. There were all the normal ones that you would expect to see: sexual assault, rape, murder, violence, police brutality etc. But there was one word that caught my eye: blonde. 

A hair color, that makes up only 2% of the world's hair colors, had become a trigger. Now if this was a case, then all hair colors would be triggering which would mean that the 207,754 people over the age of 12, who are sexually assaulted every year, would not be able to look at people because their hair color would be triggering. While it's not absurd that this would happen occasionally, by giving hair color or other common words power, we are only perpetuating the cycle of victimization. 

Everyone has their own experience and there's no reason to judge, but giving undue strength to words forces people to maintain the mindset of a victim, not a survivor. 

This past week, preparations began for Pan-Hellenic's Take Back the Night. In order to raise awareness and for the issue and support for the event, Surviving in Numbers was brought back to campus. After being up for only a few hours, the displays were torn down by a student who found them too triggering. 

Valid belief. Not so valid action. 

Regardless, I can't change the action, only ask that the liaison to the 'activist community' own up to their mistake in not alerting the group to these plans. Other than the problematic concept of one student group allowing another to hold an event, my issue is with student groups believing that they speak for the entire community. If it is valid to say that Hillel does not speak for all Jews on campus (which it most certainly does not), then why would it be valid to say that the only sexual assault group speaks for the nearly 600 people on this campus who experience rape or sexual assault within their 4 years of college. 

There cannot be a monopoly on the victim voice. 

[simonaswords]

My house constantly makes fun of me for being on okcupid.  I tell them I just go on it as a joke, but really it's more because I'm lonely and don't seem to be able to make guys like me, at least not the ones in my vicinity. 

[simonaswords]

National messes and work frustrations.

Literally, who invented bureaucracy. 

Stop.

Go home.