Ways to Be a Good Lesbian Ally
respect our pronouns and do not assume that our pronouns are always she/her
respect our partners, no matter what they look like or what pronouns they use (trans butches and nonbinary lesbians exist and enrich our community)
not assume that we're secretly bi because we dated a man in the past
respect butch/femme identities as lesbian genders, identities, and important parts of our history and the ways in which we interact and present ourselves to other women
do not hypersexualize or desexualize us
do not treat butches like men and femmes like straight women
do not generalize butches as aggressive and domineering or femmes as soft and pliable
respect stud, stemme, and ag/agg as black lesbian genders and identities exclusively
do not generalize lesbians as exclusionary and mean
do not treat the word lesbian as a word that contains wiggle room for attraction to men
be aware of the fact that comphet is a very real thing for us and doesn't make us any less lesbian
RESPECT TRANS LESBIANS!!!!!
do not become suspicious of people who have lesbian flags in their profile pictures, the word "lesbian" in their usernames, the word "dyke" in their usernames, or just because they're lesbians of being TERFs or biphobes based off of those things alone
do NOT let the word dyke pass your lips if you're not a lesbian
call out your friends if you catch them being lesbophobic
don't get defensive when someone tells you that you're bring or have said something lesbophobic
don't make any broad generalizations of us at all
do not assume that lesbians of color (especially black lesbians) are inherently aggressive or demure
realize that we are the smallest sexual minority and that we need other folks to listen to and stand up for us as well
don't treat our attraction to women as predatory or inherently sexually charged
keep lesbian children safe, especially from fetishization
do not allow us to be fetishized by men
be there for your lesbian friends because it's very lonely for us a lot of the time
don't assume that all trans lesbians are femme or have to perform any level of femininity for your comfort
use the word lesbian when talking about us and don't treat it like a dirty or harsh word
spread our donation posts and support organizations that help us
support our art and writing
advocate for positive lesbian representation
listen to us <3 that's all