They Don't Teach Bigotry in the Obsidian Order

[hydrogenandtonic-deactivated202]

are we ever going to talk about how you have to get actual permission from both your captain and doctor in order to have sex with an alien

like who sits around Starfleet and makes these rules

[lohlunat]

For everyone wondering about this:

“All Starfleet personnel must obtain authorization from their CO as well as clearance from their medical officer before initiating an intimate relationship with an alien species.” (VOY: “The Disease”)

It’s true. 

[flowerkirks-deactivated20140917]

this is hilarious

yo captain i wanna bang this alien

[unicorncoalition]

sdfsldkfslkj this is the part of Bones’s job he hates the most, going through all the forms on his PADD to give the green-light to all these potential sexual encounters he just WISHES HE DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE but you know he actually DOES SOME RESEARCH to see if people will be COMPATIBLE whereas Jim just ticks the box, all, FREE LOVE, BONES and Bones has to be like GODDAMMIT DID YOU EVEN READ THE FILE, JIM, THEY DON’T EVEN HAvE ORIFICES and Jim is like, wow, Bones, they can still have fun, don’t judge

and bones

hates

everything

[tptigger]

This sounds like the sort of rule that got instituted because of something that happened to Kirk, TBH.

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

It’s referred to in Bones’ log as “The Incident” and Kirk was itchy and purple for weeks

[sjw-julian-bashir]

it’s because of charles “trip” tucker and his discovery that sometimes, putting your hands in a bowl of space gravel with an alien will get you pregnant regardless of which parts you have

[sjw-garak]

@sjw-julian-bashir this is a positively quaint aspect of Starfleet protocol that I was wholly unaware of up until this point. I do wonder, dear doctor, what did Captain Sisko think of our romance when you first asked him if you were allowed to proceed? Or, did you neglect to ask him at all?

[sjw-julian-bashir]

@sjw-garak It’s…possible that I didn’t ask him…but that’s largely because one can alternatively go through the CMO and guess who I am

[sjw-garak]

@sjw-julian-bashir Yes, I suppose you’re right. However, the above states you need clearance from both the CMO and captain … I love it when you break Starfleet protocol for me, dear. 🕵😘

[hydrogenandtonic-deactivated202]

are we ever going to talk about how you have to get actual permission from both your captain and doctor in order to have sex with an alien

like who sits around Starfleet and makes these rules

[lohlunat]

For everyone wondering about this:

“All Starfleet personnel must obtain authorization from their CO as well as clearance from their medical officer before initiating an intimate relationship with an alien species.” (VOY: “The Disease”)

It’s true. 

[flowerkirks-deactivated20140917]

this is hilarious

yo captain i wanna bang this alien

[unicorncoalition]

sdfsldkfslkj this is the part of Bones’s job he hates the most, going through all the forms on his PADD to give the green-light to all these potential sexual encounters he just WISHES HE DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE but you know he actually DOES SOME RESEARCH to see if people will be COMPATIBLE whereas Jim just ticks the box, all, FREE LOVE, BONES and Bones has to be like GODDAMMIT DID YOU EVEN READ THE FILE, JIM, THEY DON’T EVEN HAvE ORIFICES and Jim is like, wow, Bones, they can still have fun, don’t judge

and bones

hates

everything

[tptigger]

This sounds like the sort of rule that got instituted because of something that happened to Kirk, TBH.

[saxifraga-x-urbium]

It’s referred to in Bones’ log as “The Incident” and Kirk was itchy and purple for weeks

[sjw-julian-bashir]

it’s because of charles “trip” tucker and his discovery that sometimes, putting your hands in a bowl of space gravel with an alien will get you pregnant regardless of which parts you have

[sjw-garak]

@sjw-julian-bashir this is a positively quaint aspect of Starfleet protocol that I was wholly unaware of up until this point. I do wonder, dear doctor, what did Captain Sisko think of our romance when you first asked him if you were allowed to proceed? Or, did you neglect to ask him at all?

[untitled94191]

Dr. Handsome Smile Julian Bashir

[sjw-garak]

@sjw-julian-bashir

😍😜😘

[sjw-julian-bashir]

@sjw-garak quit being a flirt (never stop being a flirt)

[sjw-garak]

Have I ever told you that your smile is one of your best features? Which, is to say it's just a bit better than every other absolutely stunning part of you.

The only aspect of your smile that I dislike is that I can't see it when I'm kissing you. 😉😘

[trekpositive]

Garak knows it can be hard to find clothes to suit your gender expression, but he would be more than happy to help you shop! He could even make the perfect clothes for you himself.

[sjw-garak]

I am always willing to provide my services to anyone who may need them. I also offer discounts to those who are financially disadvantaged. I firmly believe everyone deserves to look lovely and to like how they look no matter their status in society.

[relatablepicturesofgarak]

[just-a-cato]

I mean, duh, Julian. They teach this to Cardassians in pre-school. 

[dominiondiscourse]

STOP THIS RIGHT NOW

[startrekdiscourse]

😷😷😷😷😷😷

[sjw-garak]

@guldukat-is-shredded is enforcing unattainable physical ideals that promote self-hatred in those unable to conform to impossible standards.

[guldukat-is-shredded]

Ah, but, as the very pinnacle of virility and physical prowess, my body represents the ideal towards which all citizens must strive to most fully provide service to their State. It gives them motivation, a visual reminder of their duty, if you will. Outcasts need not be so bitter about these things, Garak.

[sjw-garak]

Everyone serves the State in their own specific ways. For instance, a farmer need not be “shredded” to provide for the Union – they merely need to be able to adeptly grow crops. Most jobs, indeed, do not need the workers to be overly invested in their physical appearance. The State cares not for one’s looks, it only cares for their loyalty and value overall. In fact, as is the case with you, one’s vanity and ego can greatly impede their ability to selflessly sacrifice themselves in service to the State.

As for the last remark, I am not bitter. I simply wanted to point out how wrong your view of the world is so that those less informed than I might not feel bad about their physiques.

[guldukat-is-shredded]

A salient point! Though, I find that I must disagree. The typical Cardassian farmer must be sufficiently yolked and strong of back to break through the hard soil and till the land. So too must Cardassia’s citizens streamline their physiques such that the astral fields of the Alpha quadrant quaver before the mighty, muscled hand of the State and throw forth crop. A sharp military mind would see the advantage of setting forth a strong image with which to cow the enemy before wasting precious resources on a battle unnecessarily fought.

Ah, but such matters are above you. I could not expect such a weak excuse for a Cardassian to understand. Go. I believe your paramour was to meet you for lunch. I'danian spiced pudding, was it?

[sjw-garak]

Dukat, might I remind you that farmers in our day and age would hardly be caught dead tilling the soil under their own power. There is all manner of machines and automation to do much of their daily work for them. If they were to spend all day pulling a plow on their back they would have no time to think of their duty to the State.

And, I must say that much of the Alpha Quadrant could not care any less about how strong and overly muscled our leaders (military or otherwise) are. It is better to not be seen as a true threat so that those you wish to destroy willingly let you into their inner sanctums, wrongly believing that you're harmless. It allows you to strike at the heart of your enemies in an effortless and undetectable fashion. There is quite a bit of value in looking physically unthreatening while, at the same time, having more than enough knowledge to kill any and everyone you see fit to be rid of.

And yes, my handsome, young, and extremely intelligent partner is waiting for me so I will be going momentarily. But, before I leave, I'd just like to remind you that, in spite of more moderate physique, I have no trouble attracting others and have never had to force others to be with me . . . unlike you. It's almost as if people judge others by their actions and personalities rather than how they look.

[dominiondiscourse]

STOP THIS RIGHT NOW

[startrekdiscourse]

😷😷😷😷😷😷

[sjw-garak]

@guldukat-is-shredded is enforcing unattainable physical ideals that promote self-hatred in those unable to conform to impossible standards.

[guldukat-is-shredded]

Ah, but, as the very pinnacle of virility and physical prowess, my body represents the ideal towards which all citizens must strive to most fully provide service to their State. It gives them motivation, a visual reminder of their duty, if you will. Outcasts need not be so bitter about these things, Garak.

[sjw-garak]

Everyone serves the State in their own specific ways. For instance, a farmer need not be “shredded” to provide for the Union – they merely need to be able to adeptly grow crops. Most jobs, indeed, do not need the workers to be overly invested in their physical appearance. The State cares not for one’s looks, it only cares for their loyalty and value overall. In fact, as is the case with you, one’s vanity and ego can greatly impede their ability to selflessly sacrifice themselves in service to the State.

As for the last remark, I am not bitter. I simply wanted to point out how wrong your view of the world is so that those less informed than I might not feel bad about their physiques.

[untitled94191]

Dr. Handsome Smile Julian Bashir

[sjw-garak]

@sjw-julian-bashir

😍😜😘

[raisinchallah]

Really makes you think how the prime directive always benefits those who commit horrible atrocities

[sjw-garak]

The Federation likes to act high and mighty for having rules and regulations. They like to believe that they are the purest and most compassionate confederation in the galaxy simply because of nebulous statements their citizens are supposed to obey.

Their hypocrisy lies in that they only follow their rules when it suits them. My society has done atrocious things but at least we don’t talk until we’re blue in the face about how morally superior we are to everyone else. 

@federationdiscourse what do you have to say for yourselves? 

[hentaishaming-deactivated202007]

Some people??? Keep their mask on???? To cope?????

[saiasus]

[sjw-garak]

[dominiondiscourse]

STOP THIS RIGHT NOW

[startrekdiscourse]

😷😷😷😷😷😷

[sjw-garak]

@guldukat-is-shredded is enforcing unattainable physical ideals that promote self-hatred in those unable to conform to impossible standards.

[federationdiscourse]

Star Trek Discourse Gothic

there has been no discourse for over two weeks, you are worried everyone is getting tired of the discourse, you see one inane post, within five minutes its spirals out of control

there are 50+ discourse blogs, but you know for a fact there are only 35 people tops who run them

there are characters who never met in canon that are now arguing over the use of humanoid vs vulcanoid

some of these characters are dead

there are three different garaks, you don’t question this

no one is affiliated with the federation except anti-sjw-riker

anti-sjw-riker and sjw-laforge are run by the same person

you log onto the discord, you ask lore for a cat, he refuses to give you one

a random user will post a picture of their pet, you go ‘aww’ and send a nice message. three minutes ago you were calling this person vulcanphobic and threatening to expel them from the federation

you only ever see discourse from the 24th century, there is no discourse in the 23rd

you follow every single st discourse blog, when the tea is spilling you see the same post on your dashboard 23 separate times

the vast majority of your followers and notes are just other discourse blogs

[sjw-julian-bashir]

@garakgossip @sjw-garak Tell me the truth, Garak. How are there two of you?

[sjw-garak]

I have no idea who that imposter is. Perhaps a changeling or a look alike the Obsidian Order has crafted to deceive you, my dear doctor.

[garakgossip]

Sounds like something an Obsidian Order plant would say 👀

[sjw-garak]

No, that sounds like something an Obsidian Order plant would say. Perhaps you should stake a more legitimate claim to your identity by supplying hard evidence? 

Or, I suppose you could just refuse to provide proof and therefore, by omission, admit you are not the real Elim Garak. 

Just a thought.

[sjw-julian-bashir]

your fave [sjw-garak] is problematic

Yes, he his. And I see and recognize his flaws (even when he thinks that he’s hiding) and I love him anyway.

[garakgossip]

@sjw-garak did nothing wrong in his entire life except for that orange jumpsuit on s3 of RuGul’s drag race

[sjw-garak]

Beg your pardon, but I must disagree with your estimation of my character. I looked absolutely fierce in my expertly crafted and positively show-stopping tangerine jumpsuit. 

I have done many awful things in my life but my fashion choices have never fallen into the category of “problematic.” 

[tinsnip]

Here’s something to think about: Odo is self-taught.

No mentor. No tracks to follow. Just plunked into an office by himself on a chaotic station. And he went, in a matter of years, from ‘guy randomly assigned to investigate a murder who borks it up’ to ‘single-handed enforcer of justice with a network of contacts that stretches from Starfleet to Cardassia Prime’.

He doesn’t just keep a lid on station shenanigans. He interrupts smuggling rings that are entirely off station. His tendrils are everywhere. And he’s always watching.

And this is our Odo. Who means well.

I can very easily see how the Dominion came to be.

[sjw-garak]

@ododiscourse More people should respect and recognize your progress in this fashion. You're an astounding person, Odo.

[sjw-garak]

@kelas-parmak-discourse Hello, Dr. Parmak. How have you been since we last met?

[sjw-parmak-blog]

Very good my dear Elim, I hope you are too?

Now then, would you tell me all about this lovely Doctor Bashir I’ve seen so much about?

[sjw-garak]

Oh, I’m quite well too, Kelas. Thank you for asking.

Dr. Bashir? Well, I don’t know if I have much to tell – he’s just a kind young human I knew once upon a time. I’ve written him a bit since I left DS9, but we were hardly close when I left. I doubt the bit of communication we’ve sustained through letters is anything more than him trying to be polite.

[sjw-parmak-blog]

Ah, I’m sure the good Doctor doesn’t see it as such. Either way, I’m glad you found company in exile.

[sjw-garak]

I suppose that I’m also quite glad I had a bit of company during my exile. I’m sure that I would have perished or gone insane without Dr. Bashir’s help.

But, how we grew apart during the Dominion War has left a rather sour taste in my mouth. Sadly, I found that I needed him more than he ever needed me. I was just a puzzle for him to figure out.

[sjw-julian-bashir]

Garak, you know that you matter to me. I became distant during the War, and no amount of brandishing my schedule as an on-call federation doctor can truly make up for that. But I do believe that we can heal this, and besides–what makes you think I have you all figured out?

[sjw-garak]

Well, excuse me for assuming you didn’t care a great deal about me when this is the first time you’ve talked about healing things between us. Did Ezri finally kick you to the curb or did you just get bored enough with her that you decided to go back to an old puzzle of yours?

And, I know for a fact you don’t have me figured out – if that was the case you would have started this conversation far sooner. More to the point, you would have made overtures to mend our relationship in a non-public space, unlike the one these messages currently occupy.

To speak frankly, I was always more than willing to try to accommodate your schedule and I feel that if I had really mattered so much to you perhaps you would have found time for me in the same way you clearly found time for Ezri.

This is all quite too little too late and smacks of saving face after being embarrassed publically. If you want to set things right then you have to do far better than this, doctor. 

[sjw-julian-bashir]

Ezri and I are friends–on and off kissing-friends, yes, but friends. Hell, the first deeper conversation we had was about her having realized that she could never see me as a partner. But that has nothing to do with why I didn’t contact you. Garak, I didn’t contact you because I thought that you were gone.

If I’d had you figured out then I’d have gotten in touch sooner, yes. If I could read minds and sift through all your codes, I would have gotten in touch sooner. As it stands, unfortunately, Garak, an augment is only an improved human, not a completely different creature.

Don’t throw “accommodation” around  like you mean it, Garak. “More than willing” is just a cover-up as if I’d forget your willful avoidance of my every passing glance. When I got back to the station, you acted like I wasn’t even there. What else was I supposed to do but move on?

[sjw-garak]

Doctor, did you ever think that you should have confronted me after your return? Did you ever think that perhaps someone with my background and my psychological profile might be wary of becoming overly involved with another party? Did you ever think that I never stopped caring for you but that it was merely the way in which I expressed my care that had changed? 

You heard Tain call me a weakness he couldn’t afford. You were my weakness but I couldn’t afford you in a different way. I didn’t care about what happened to me, but I couldn’t afford to lose you to any of my enemies. The war was heating up and I was falling back down the pit of espionage and black op tactics. I had to dance with the devils of my past to give Captain Sisko what he needed. I didn’t want your association with me to bring you harm.

So, I became distant. And, in the meantime, you acquired a friend with benefits. Perhaps I wouldn’t have been up front with you back then, but it remains that you left me without so much as saying it was all over (or even asking me if it was over). If you had time to romp around in the holosuits with Chief O’Brien you surely had enough time to break up with me. 

If I apparently meant so much to you then why didn’t even give our parting the time of day?

[sjw-garak]

@kelas-parmak-discourse Hello, Dr. Parmak. How have you been since we last met?

[sjw-parmak-blog]

Very good my dear Elim, I hope you are too?

Now then, would you tell me all about this lovely Doctor Bashir I’ve seen so much about?

[sjw-garak]

Oh, I’m quite well too, Kelas. Thank you for asking.

Dr. Bashir? Well, I don’t know if I have much to tell – he’s just a kind young human I knew once upon a time. I’ve written him a bit since I left DS9, but we were hardly close when I left. I doubt the bit of communication we’ve sustained through letters is anything more than him trying to be polite.

[sjw-parmak-blog]

Ah, I’m sure the good Doctor doesn’t see it as such. Either way, I’m glad you found company in exile.

[sjw-garak]

I suppose that I’m also quite glad I had a bit of company during my exile. I’m sure that I would have perished or gone insane without Dr. Bashir’s help.

But, how we grew apart during the Dominion War has left a rather sour taste in my mouth. Sadly, I found that I needed him more than he ever needed me. I was just a puzzle for him to figure out.

[sjw-julian-bashir]

Garak, you know that you matter to me. I became distant during the War, and no amount of brandishing my schedule as an on-call federation doctor can truly make up for that. But I do believe that we can heal this, and besides–what makes you think I have you all figured out?

[sjw-garak]

Well, excuse me for assuming you didn't care a great deal about me when this is the first time you've talked about healing things between us. Did Ezri finally kick you to the curb or did you just get bored enough with her that you decided to go back to an old puzzle of yours?

And, I know for a fact you don't have me figured out -- if that was the case you would have started this conversation far sooner. More to the point, you would have made overtures to mend our relationship in a non-public space, unlike the one these messages currently occupy.

To speak frankly, I was always more than willing to try to accommodate your schedule and I feel that if I had really mattered so much to you perhaps you would have found time for me in the same way you clearly found time for Ezri.

This is all quite too little too late and smacks of saving face after being embarrassed publically. If you want to set things right then you have to do far better than this, doctor.